We've raised a 22, 18, 13, and 6 yr old. ALL GIRLS.
**bangs head for having all girls and wishing cell phones had never been invented because when they asked Im weak and I couldnt say no! **
Privacy is one thing, setting up secret meetings, sending suggestive pics, and etc with my minor daughters is another. Our 18 year old was seeing a
little boy when she was just about 16. Seeing as in at school, out house to play games, his house when parents were home to play basketball, and
sometimes when a fair or whatever came along we would bring him along with us. He was a nice polite kid we enjoyed having around.The older brother of
this kid was 23 and texted her a pic of his erect penis. She kept this quiet and never told us - but I popped a surprise cell inspection. And
immediately went berzerk. My wife went into orbit. We drove over to the house to confront the ADULT and he said it was only a "joke" and had no idea
why we were so upset. It was resolved, believe me. When discussing this with the guy's parents in his presence and mentioning calling the police and
pressing charges it was all of a sudden not so funny to him or them. Especially when the accompanying text said " do you want to meet my little
friend". Soliciting minors and sending pornographic images to them is a no-no. Our daughter didnt suffer any social repercussions and we still
enjoyed having the kid over , ( but she never went back over to his house) and she learned to tell us about what she calls "creepers". Letting us
find out on our own was not the way to go!
WIth your children that you are responsible for privacy takes a back seat. Kids are just not equipped to see all of the bad out there and the things
lurking in others. Predators are pretty slick and kids are easily caught up in things because being online or texting isnt quite "real life" to
them. In reality, its an open doorway into your home and to your children. Our daughter generally sees only the best in people and never dreamed this
would happen. The wife and I figured it might and were definitely going to check the phone. Its your duty as a parent.
I will say you texting the kids back is pretty damned creepy and if you had texted my child and Id found out you were an adult, youd have met me.
Learn from that mistake and take the adult to adult road - NEVER mess with anyones kid even if itsin retaliation for something that kid may have done
you find to be bad. What you think is cute or funny or your attempts to discipline or teach a lesson to someone elses kid may cause you to suffer
consequences you hadnt considered. You have also possibly destroyed her socially and when the kids tell their parents, you will be looked at by some
as a threat or potential threat. That sort of behavior is just not acceptable. Live and learn.
Take her phone for a period of time you discuss with her and discuss with her WHY you took the phone and what you expect in the future from her. Then
return the phone with a clean slate (but vigilant eye) at the time you told her. Let her know what you will be doing and how you will be doing it when
monitoring her. At 13 she isnt a fool.
