Do nice guys really finish last?

I've been a fly on this wall for awhile now and I have to admit that it's very entertaining. So far, Already Gone has my vote for the best response with Gazrok coming in at a close second.

To answer you question though OP, no, nice guys don't finish last. They don't get the scraps, left-overs, sloppy seconds, whatever....either. What they get are the nice girls.

Birds of a feather my friend, always keep that in mind. Also remember that from what you posted I get the feeling that you're better than getting a "bad girl" who has changed for the good. Why? Because I get the feeling that you're not going to "settle" for being a bad boy just so you can get some. Even if you are a good guy, some of us go down that road because we get lonely. It doesn't make us bad, it just means that we made some bad decisions in our lives. Trust me, I've known bad girls and they tend to have baggage that we don't deserve. If you don't believe me listen to this song and tell me if it scares you or not:



You're better than that.( It is a good sountrack for bedtime though ) Besides, the girls who like the bad boy type tend to stay on that track for quite a few years.There are some though, who like some good guys, just make bad decisions. It doesn't necessarily make them bad girls though.



You'll just have to trust me when I tell you that there are still girls/women out there who have morals, a good agenda to fill, and the inner strength it takes to stick to them. If you stick to your guns like they do, you'll attract them. Sometimes even guys like me, who have made bad chioices, can still attract women like that. Only God know how. We're lucky I guess.

As Already Gone said, some women are a mother in the kitchen, a lady in public and a whore in bed.

And THAT my friend is the type of woman that good guys like us deserve.

So no....we DON'T finish last....we finish with the best.

reply to post by Taupin Desciple


Wow, great response! Thanks!

Originally posted by mossme89
reply to post by Taupin Desciple

 

Wow, great response! Thanks!

No problem.

I'm not Dr. Phil but I play one on the internet.

reply to post by mossme89


I have been single all my life so I feel your pain. I am always nice to women even if they act immature or say mean things to me but still I move forward. If I ever get a girl friend by just being me, a nice guy then i'll let y'all know if its true or not.

Unfortunately we do. Still I'd rather be a nice guy and come last than a pr&ck and get the girl. I'm happy with who I am and wouldn't want to change. I admit I am terrible at chatting up women. The girlfriends I have had have all approached me, not the other way around.

It's funny, in my local town, all the best looking girls, go for the hard lads who end up treating them badly getting them pregnant and then cheating on them. Seems these are attractive qualities to many women.

Originally posted by curious7

Originally posted by Suspiria
I'll ask mine when he comes in from work whether he finished last.

So bedroom shenanigans usually happen when you're sleeping or otherwise unconscious?

In that case, yeah, ANY guy can finish last then.

A. No
B. You can get creams for that so I've heard.

No one can resist a healthy,happy,kind,confident guy or a girl.... having a sense of humor is a bonus.... just looking for sex?, then most guys go for the body and face,and girls for the body and attitude.........Being educated, creative ,brave,mature, patient ,loving, and considerate plus all the above will make you a very cool person,even if you are not very cute....Of course you could always go the other way and insult and bully people to see how far you can go... ,Sure some might like that! ,but they usually end up being the ones you will be much better off without..

I guess we are going to move to this thread now?

I stick by my points made in THIS thread.

People go after what they want, or in this case what they find attractive. So, if nice = "unattractive to a prospect" (Which it does in most, if not all, cases) then yes, a "nice guy" will always finish last. At least until they find someone that is attracted to them.

And, like I kept asking in that other thread. Why would you want to date someone who was not interested in you? (By complaining about how you are "finishing last" is exactly what you are doing.) If a person doesn't like ya, time to move on to the next one.

If they all refuse to date you, then something tells me ya ain't so nice.

reply to post by curious7


Your story has proven the silly adage untrue actually. It took you some time, but you found someone who likes you for you.

OP, no, nice guys do not always finish last. At your young age, you may strike out more often than you hit homers (sorry), but keep being yourself and you will find the right woman. I am as anti-alpha male as you can get, I am the perpetual nice guy, always helping others. This makes me happy and sure it has made some women see me as a pushover and leave. So what? If that is what they are like, I would not have been happy long-term with them anyway. I have been dating my girlfriend for five years now and I got her by being the nice guy. I never tried to get into her pants (before dating ) and I always treated her with the utmost respect. She saw the type of person I am and that is what she wanted and continues to want. Now, we are both in our early 30s, so I have worked for some time to find her (don't worry, you probably won't have to wait so long), but the years of dating and screwing up were well worth it.

ETA: Being unable to break out of the "friend zone" is nonsense too. My current and last GF were both great friends before we dated and it made our relationships so much better.

Originally posted by Jepic

A better man. Oh my friend but he is already a better man than those bad boys or "alpha males" we speak of.
He is such a better and bigger man. Most girls or women just don't see it.Let's not confuse female views with the reality.

What you say might be true.

But that doesn't help him.

And you use alpha male as derogatory. That's what you should strive to be in life.
Bad boys have traits of the alpha male but they also have some bad traits as well.

And I'm shaking my head at your last comment. You don't get it.

reply to post by mossme89



3 Simple Law's to follow to avoid falling into the nice guy trap:

I) The Golden Rule: Do onto others as you would have done to yourself.

-Reserve this one for people you just met.

II) The Law of Mutuality: Do onto others as they do onto you.

- After you establish a rapport with someone, treat them as they treat you.

III) The Law of Morality

- If abiding by the Law of Mutuality goes against your conscience, then avoid the person all together.







Following these simple Law's will keep others from taking advantage of you, and if you follow ALL THREE, it will reduce the risk of hurting yourself or hurting others.

Originally posted by mossme89

Originally posted by Gwampo
reply to post by mossme89

 

and yes, nice guys finish last. Start working out, it will change your body and your mind.

edit on 21-2-2012 by Gwampo because: (no reason given)

I do work out by running. So what should I do? Treat women like crap? How do I do that?

You need to be comfortable with yourself. If you think that you are too weak to poor to [insert thing] then try to learn to live with it.

If a person cannot accept some things of you dont change for her. Skip to the next one. Its all trial and error. Try to archieve harmony over everything else. If you can make a person feel nice loved and safe without compromising on who or what you are then you sir got a person that could have longterm potential.

Originally posted by Taupin Desciple


And THAT my friend is the type of woman that good guys like us deserve.

So no....we DON'T finish last....we finish with the best.

i also agree that nice guys don't finish last. they are the ones with the strong long lasting relationships in the end. the other advice mentioned somewhere in the comments is BE YOURSELF. don't change into someone you're not just to get a girl you like because in the end it will be a mess.

personally i'd love to find a nice guy who is TRULY a nice guy. i've kind of lost hope there are any left.

reply to post by mossme89


Haha bro that was my exact situation! Like down to every little detail. My advice? Go for older chicks! Seriously haha it works and girls do grow out of the bad boy stage. And by older i mean a chick in their mid 20's if you are 18. But yeah girls get to a point where they get sick of being treated like # and that those type of dudes are just immature.

But yea honestly dude they love it. Only thing is do you look 18? I got away with it because I looked older

But on a more mature note I know you probably get told this a lot but it's the nice guys that end up getting married to the good girls and the jerks grow old and lonely. And don't try changeing yourself man just be yourself and youl attract the right people but just be confident in how you are

Originally posted by doodles40
reply to post by mossme89

 

Haha bro that was my exact situation! Like down to every little detail. My advice? Go for older chicks! Seriously haha it works and girls do grow out of the bad boy stage. And by older i mean a chick in their mid 20's if you are 18. But yeah girls get to a point where they get sick of being treated like # and that those type of dudes are just immature.

But yea honestly dude they love it. Only thing is do you look 18? I got away with it because I looked older

But on a more mature note I know you probably get told this a lot but it's the nice guys that end up getting married to the good girls and the jerks grow old and lonely. And don't try changeing yourself man just be yourself and youl attract the right people but just be confident in how you are

edit on 14-3-2012 by doodles40 because: (no reason given)

There's a downside to that. When we're 25, we want grown men, not little boys. Our minds have turned towards marriage and children. The only thing an 18 year old is good for is sex. They have nothing else to offer you--no education, no job, no maturity and their mothers are still cleaning their rooms. No grown woman wants that.

Sorry, but there it is.

I would like to say depends...

Nice guys get better quality girls... but when i saw nice guys i don't mean scared and never approach her types... or the ones that let them run you over... its about having control and respecting at the same time....

I look for girls that are successful, educated, in career level similar to mine(hey i worked for it, so i deserve it!) not the ones that hook up with u after like first date.... i want challenge not war

Sadly my natural man instinct does kick in, but i try to resist my self for going for the random ones that seem interested, which i would regret later on.

reply to post by HappyBunny


Oh yeah that's kinda what I was meaning for fun that's why I said more serious stuff in the second part

Depends though maybe this guy is mature for his age and the girls his age are immature? but yeah I get where you're coming from I guess it depends on the older girl aswell though

It's true, nice guys do finish last...To be honest I'm an asshole. Not in the sense where I'm always a dick to a girl, but i'll ignore her or will be late to pick her up, blow her off, etc. It makes them want you even more, trust me. YET I do nice things like pay for dates, open doors, etc. You got to find a balance..More so on the asshole side though, only good looking guys can get away with it though. So if you're on the short end of the looks department you might want to stick to being the pushover p****y. just my 2 cents.

Edit: BTW, to all the women who say they want the nice guy type stop lying to yourself...You may like it because that's what you see on movies but nice guys are boring...Nice guys are usually the type of guys who will agree with you on everything and don't have their own opinions, they'll be whipped by you.. Not to mention they'll usually be horrible at sex, being too soft and cuddly. Women think they want that but they want the complete opposite, hell what am I saying they never know what they want. No matter what age.

Originally posted by jjjigga
It's true, nice guys do finish last...To be honest I'm an asshole. Not in the sense where I'm always a dick to a girl, but i'll ignore her or will be late to pick her up, blow her off, etc. It makes them want you even more, trust me. YET I do nice things like pay for dates, open doors, etc. You got to find a balance..More so on the asshole side though, only good looking guys can get away with it though. So if you're on the short end of the looks department you might want to stick to being the pushover p****y. just my 2 cents.

Edit: BTW, to all the women who say they want the nice guy type stop lying to yourself...You may like it because that's what you see on movies but nice guys are boring...Nice guys are usually the type of guys who will agree with you on everything and don't have their own opinions, they'll be whipped by you.. Not to mention they'll usually be horrible at sex, being too soft and cuddly. Women think they want that but they want the complete opposite, hell what am I saying they never know what they want. No matter what age.

edit on 18-3-2012 by jjjigga because: (no reason given)

Funny I recently kicked a guy to the curb for being exactly like you. Btw there is a big difference between a nice guy and a pushover. What you are describing is not what most girls think of when they are talking about nice guys.