posted on Sep, 14 2004 @ 03:12 PM
Just a little humor to cheer up what seems to be such a sad day:
Texas has given all those complainers plenty of time to get used to the
results. After seeing the whiners along the campaign route, the folks from
Texas are considering taking matters into our/their hands.
Here is our solution:
#1: Let John Kerry become President of the United States. (All other 49 states.)
#2: George W. Bush becomes the President of the Republic Of Texas.
So what does Texas have to do to survive as a Republic???
1. NASA is just south of Houston, Texas. (We will control the space industry.)
2. We refine over 85% of the gasoline in the United States.
3. Defense Industry (We have over 65% of it). The term "Don't mess with Texas," will take on a whole new meaning.
4. Oil - we can supply all the oil that the Republic of Texas will need for the next 300 years. Yankee states? Sorry about that.
5. Natural Gas - Again we have all we need and it's too bad about those
northern states. John Kerry will figure a way to keep them warm....
6. Computer Industry - We currently lead the nation in producing computer chips and communications: Small places like Texas Instruments, Dell
Computer, EDS, Raytheon, National Semiconductor, Motorola, Intel, AMD, Atmel, Applied Materials, Ball Semiconductor, Dallas Semiconductor, Delphi,
Nortel, Alcatel, Etc., Etc. The list goes on and on.
7. Health Centers - We have the largest research centers for Cancer research, the best Burn Centers, the top trauma units in the world, and other
large health planning centers.
8. We have enough colleges to keep us going: UT Texas, A&M, Texas Tech,
Rice, SMU, University of Houston, Baylor, UNT, Texas Women's University,
Ivy grows better in the South anyway
9. We have a ready supply of workers. (We'll just open the border, when we
need some more)
10. We have control of the paper industry, plastics, insurance, etc.
11. In case of foreign invasion, we have the Texas National Guard and the
Texas Air National Guard. We don't have an army, but since everybody down
here has at least six rifles and a pile of ammo, we can raise an army in 24
hours if we need it. If the situation really gets bad, we can always call Department of Public Safety and ask them to send over a couple Texas
(Their proven 100 year motto; "One Riot, One Ranger").
12. We are totally self sufficient in beef, poultry, hogs and several types of grain, fruit and vegetables and lets not forget seafood from the gulf.
And everybody down here knows how to cook them so that they taste good. Don't need any food.
This just names a few of the items that will keep the Republic of Texas in good shape. There isn't a thing out there that we need and don't have.
Now to the rest of the United States, under "President" Kerry: Since you
won't have the refineries to get gas for your cars, only "President" Kerry
will be able to drive around in his 9 mile per gallon SUV. The rest of the United States will have to walk or ride bikes.
You won't have any TV, as our Houston Space Center will cut off your
communications. You won't have any natural gas to heat your homes, but
since Kerry has predicted global warming, you will not need the gas.
Signed, The People in Texas
Y'all have a nice day