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Gay People

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posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:24 AM
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Lets have a civilized discussion about Gays and Lesbians!


I think gay people are interesting, but I'm always a little reserved expressing that because I don't want people to think I'm gay.

Lesbians seem really cool too =] and I'm not just saying that because it can be hot, I'm saying that because... lesbians are cool.



So when did you know you weren't straight?



Edit: I realize that actually didn't read as funny as I thought it would, I was trying to be funny but also serious.
You know, to break the Ice.

I am not closed minded.
I realize lesbians are more than just straight mens fantasy.
I have a younger bro who is gay. But he is still very awkward regardless and doesn't like talking about it too too much (he's too young to be cool yet)


I added an edit to my post to better reflect my views.


also I'm not worried about this getting out of control at all... Don't feed the freaking trolls y'all. Its 2012 we can have a honest and respectful discussion about homosexuality.
edit on 26-1-2012 by truthinfact because: (no reason given)




posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:29 AM
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I judge a person based on the merits of who they are, not what their sexual or other preference is.
Someone being gay is about as interesting to me as someone liking anchovi's on their pizza (yuck). Not my thing, but hey, I am not going to think they are some sort of twisted freak for liking the horrible fish stinking up the pizza.

As far as gays are interesting and lesbians are cool...thats a generalization to a massive degree. Some gays are interesting, some are boring, some are idiots, some are intellects. Lesbians are also a diverse group.

Come to find out, they are actually just people like anyone else and you can't really just cast a big label over all of them.
Like me saying "straight people are nice". erm...sure, some are, some arent, some are at times, etc..



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:35 AM
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Originally posted by truthinfact
Lets have a civilized discussion about Gays and Lesbians!


OK. What do you want to talk about?



I think gay people are interesting, but I'm always a little reserved expressing that because I don't want people to think I'm gay.


Why not? There's nothing wrong with it.



So when did you know you weren't straight?


When did you know that you were?



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:39 AM
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reply to post by truthinfact
 


You just opened up Pandora's box


Expect a wild ride!

Personally, it's a non issue to me, but I hope you find the discussion that you seek.



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:41 AM
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Gays and lesbians are just like other people.

I have less trouble with lesbians, not because they're cool
but because they're just women, and they don't mind other women.

Gay men on the other hand, can range from being like "one of the girls" , they're easy and wonderful friends for women.
Then there's the other far end of the spectrum, where you have the gay man that absolutely HATES women.
I don't like that type. They're A-holes.



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:45 AM
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I agree you can't label gays or lesbians nice or cool.

I am very comfortable around gay people, then again I like most people



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:45 AM
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Originally posted by SaturnFX
I judge a person based on the merits of who they are, not what their sexual or other preference is.
Someone being gay is about as interesting to me as someone liking anchovi's on their pizza (yuck). Not my thing, but hey, I am not going to think they are some sort of twisted freak for liking the horrible fish stinking up the pizza.



Sorry to burst your bubble, but most pizza's add anchovies to their sauce. It makes it actually taste good.



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 10:45 AM
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Personally bi, but I know plenty of gay people. Some of them, you can tell it when they're like 7; others actually have to come out of the closet.

Most that I've talked to started suspecting when they were fairly young. For my own experience, I had the internal debate of "am I gay?" when I was about nine, so I don't doubt it a bit.



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:05 AM
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When did I know I was straight?

I don't even know honestly.

Yes, I Realize that was a stupid question to ask now.


I really want to talk about just what it means to be gay in america.. or anywhere. What does it mean?

What does the last leg of the civil rights movement need?


What happens after full equality?
Will the world be able to go on if there isn't one specific group of people we are supposed to hate?!?!?



edit on 26-1-2012 by truthinfact because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:20 AM
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Originally posted by truthinfact
When did I know I was straight?




What happens after full equality?
Will the world be able to go on if there isn't one specific group of people we are supposed to hate?!?!?



edit on 26-1-2012 by truthinfact because: (no reason given)


So...are you saying you have a problem with gay people, with your last statement. I'm curious why you started this thread.

Was it for controversy. Do you have any gay friends. If not, why?



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:21 AM
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Originally posted by truthinfact
I think gay people are interesting, but I'm always a little reserved expressing that because I don't want people to think I'm gay.
So when did you know you weren't straight?


Thats ridiculous! I'm gay and not interesting at all!


As for your question; if I had known what "gay" was at five years old, I could have guessed it then. I had a crush on my best friend and was very affectionate with him. I even tried to kiss him on a couple occasions. At some point society forced the idea on me that "boys are supposed to kiss girls!" and thus began the repression of my feelings.

I had a few girlfriends from age thirteen to sixteen. All of them came on to me, and I was flattered by the attention. There was never really a prominent attraction though, hence I never actually tried to get a girlfriend. Most of those relationships failed within weeks. The longest lasted 3 months. I didn't understand why they kept leaving me, but the answer is obvious now; I never "put the moves on them", never tried to have sex, so they got bored and found a horny straight guy.

During those years I found myself occasionally fantasizing about stuff with guys, which freaked me out because I had assumed a straight identity. I tried to shut these things out of my mind, but they kept creeping up on me. I assumed my failure to have a working relationship with a girl was simply because I hadn't found the right girl.

Gradually I accepted the possibility that I might be bisexual, and allowed myself to fantasize about whatever I felt like, though most of the time it was guys. Any time I thought about girls that way it felt really forced, like I had to exercise my sexuality to stay bi and not "degenerate" into "one of those gays".

Around seventeen I started messing around in online chat, having a bit of harmless fun. My fabricated attraction to females vanished and within a couple years stopped self-identifying as bisexual. The catalyst for this was a drunken hookup with a girl...which sucked.


I'm still in the closet in real life. It's been fairly easy to just be a regular-seeming guy since I'm not overly effeminate or anything, and I'm quite shy. I'm sure most of my friends have their suspicions since I rarely show any sexual interest in girls (when I do its merely to keep up appearances).

The main thing stopping me from coming out is the fear that my friends' opinions of me will drastically change. I don't want my sexuality to dominate my identity, but at the same time I can't continue to pretend I'm someone that I'm not.

Bloody hell, I spilled my guts out again. :/
edit on 26/1/2012 by Glass because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:22 AM
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I think it's flattering when I get hit on by a gay man but that's about it. I don't like to get hit on persistently, it makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable but one or two shots towards me doesn't bother me. If I get groped by a gay, then I get mad, lol One of my best friends is gay and he's not 'flaming' either, I can't stand the flamers. He really never hits on me, once in a while he'll throw something at me but I just blush and he leaves it alone after that, which i'm cool with as long as the line isn't crossed.



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:24 AM
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Originally posted by Destinyone

Originally posted by truthinfact
When did I know I was straight?




What happens after full equality?
Will the world be able to go on if there isn't one specific group of people we are supposed to hate?!?!?



edit on 26-1-2012 by truthinfact because: (no reason given)


So...are you saying you have a problem with gay people, with your last statement. I'm curious why you started this thread.

Was it for controversy. Do you have any gay friends. If not, why?



Woah woah no not at all! I was inspired by the responses I saw in this thread asking if ATS could make a LGBQT section. So i thought I would start a discussion about homosexuality!

I dont have any gay friends of my own, they think I'm gross! That why loL!



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:32 AM
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Originally posted by kimish
I think it's flattering when I get hit on by a gay man but that's about it. I don't like to get hit on persistently, it makes me feel awkward and uncomfortable but one or two shots towards me doesn't bother me.


Thats exactly how I feel when girls hit on me.


Except the bit on getting groped. I've been groped by a couple cougars in bars, and I just laughed and joked with them for a bit before moving on. Just a bit of harmless fun from my perspective.

I've noticed a lot of straight guys groping eachother around here


"No homo"



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:33 AM
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Originally posted by truthinfact
Yes, I Realize that was a stupid question to ask now.


I don't think it's a stupid question. If you're curious, it's a good question. The reason I asked is to make you think.


I'm "mostly straight".
I don't know when I knew that, I just did. I am attracted to people, not gender. I am a female and happily married to a man for 20 years. I strongly support equal rights for all people.



What does the last leg of the civil rights movement need?


The federal government needs to enforce the 14th Amendment which says: No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.

State laws against gay marriage abridge the privileges of citizens and deny gay people equal protection under the law. THAT needs to happen. Failing that, each state in turn will eventually come into the 21st century and make marriage available equally to all citizens.



What happens after full equality?


Life will go on. People will still hate those who are different than them. Gay people will still be hated and persecuted - because people are stupid, fearful, closed-minded and don't believe in freedom. But at least gay people will have equal access and protection under the law.
That's what I want.


edit on 1/26/2012 by Benevolent Heretic because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 11:37 AM
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reply to post by Glass
 


if your friends opinions of you were to significantly change if you came out (and I assume you mean in a negative way) then they werent your friends in the first place .... your good friends will still be your good friends ... and infact they probably already know ... or at least suspect ....
edit on 26-1-2012 by johnrobca because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 12:01 PM
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Originally posted by johnrobca
reply to post by Glass
 


if your friends opinions of you were to significantly change if you came out (and I assume you mean in a negative way) then they werent your friends in the first place .... your good friends will still be your good friends ... and infact they probably already know ... or at least suspect ....
edit on 26-1-2012 by johnrobca because: (no reason given)


Not to devalue your reply, but I've heard this a lot. It's true, but it doesn't change the fact that it bothers me.

I've told my two closest friends so far, and the results...vary. They both told me that it doesn't bother them, but one of them slowly, over the course of a few months, phased me out.

He stopped calling me and stopped answering my calls. On the rare occasion that he would answer my call, he'd say he'd come to hang out, and then disappear. I ran into him once at the bar, and we talked for a bit and he acted friendly as if nothing happened, and then he was gone again.

The other is in complete denial. He kept telling me that he'd find a girl to "fix" me. Needless to say he's not the brightest of my friends. He continues to point out girls and say "there's one for ya!" (facepalm)

So naturally I have to assume that if my whole circle of friends finds out, there will be at least one who will start bashing me with derogatory terms and urging others to avoid me and a few more who will phase me out. What if my smoking buddy that I chat with between classes about video games suddenly doesn't want to be near me? What if the hilarious guy in my class turns me into the butt of every joke? Thoughts like these plague me since its in my nature to overanalyze and determine possible outcomes.

I don't want to end up feeling even more isolated than I already do, and I certainly don't want my only friend to be Mr. "Don't worry, bro, we'll fix ya". -__-;



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 12:43 PM
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reply to post by Glass
 


Im really sorry to hear your experiences. I understand now why you would be cautious. Im guessing by their reaction that they have never knowingly met someone who is gay? Ignorance and fear seem to be very closely linked .... and your experiences sound like like they somehow fear you ..... Im not sure how you could turn that around without directly challenging them about it ... my answer was based on the fact that in my world I have always know people who are gay, infact we used to go to gay clubs because they were always much more fun, some of my friends are gay and some of my friends siblings are gay so within my circle of friends it actually is no big deal ... I wish that how it was for everyone ... because really when you think about it why the hell should it make a difference? Its not like you are an axe murderer!!

for what its worth ... i recommend going to a gay club to meet some like minded people ... even if you go by yourself ... youll have a great time .... and BTW ... from my experience you are never alone in a gay club


Im not sure how old you are but as a 44 year old my experience tells me that through life friends come and go, some stay forever, some are fleeting ... Ive had friends who I thought Id know forever and now never see them and ironically vice versa .... but one thing is for sure that when you share something as personal as this with friends you find out if they really are friends ... my friends are my friends no matter what they are or do, its that simple .... BUT its so much easier to ramble on than it is to actually do it .. i do realise that .... i wish you my best and perhaps if you do go to a gay club and meet some new friends and talk about your experiences it may give you the courage to tell your friends ...

when I have something difficult to do I think to myself what would life be like if I didnt do it? .... ive been through some serious sh*t in my life because I have asked that question ... the best path is rarely the easy one

good luck and i honestly mean that ..


edit on 26-1-2012 by johnrobca because: (no reason given)



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 01:43 PM
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reply to post by johnrobca
 


Thanks for the advice and kind words, and for listening to me rant.


Regardless of my bad experiences, I am more comfortable with myself now than I have ever been in the past. I'm going to have to take a chance sooner or later, and hope that my worst fears arent realized. But really, the odds of being cut off from all of my friends are quite low, and I know I can't let paranoia continue to make my decisions for me.

I've been considering telling one of my new friends who was introduced by my sister. He's a really cool guy and rather open minded so I don't think that there will be disastrous results. Its just a matter of working up the courage.



posted on Jan, 26 2012 @ 04:07 PM
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Originally posted by greenfox83

Originally posted by SaturnFX
I judge a person based on the merits of who they are, not what their sexual or other preference is.
Someone being gay is about as interesting to me as someone liking anchovi's on their pizza (yuck). Not my thing, but hey, I am not going to think they are some sort of twisted freak for liking the horrible fish stinking up the pizza.



Sorry to burst your bubble, but most pizza's add anchovies to their sauce. It makes it actually taste good.

Repulsive, and I refuse to acknowledge that as truth (nor will I read up on it just in case its true).

liar, liar -covers ears, closes eyes-



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