I Love FEMA Camps!

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***Warning to Americans: This thread requires more than 30 seconds of attention & some light reading! Please refer to the comments below from Britain, Australia, Germany, France, Spain, Portugal, Russia, South America, Saudi Arabia, Iran, Syria, Finland, Sweden, Africa, India, Pakistan, Poland, and Canada for a quick and easy break down of the contents.***
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Oh my, where to begin...


I know this is a dated topic, but have you seen the recruitment ad for the Army's Internment Resettlement Specialist?

I mean really, what an opportunity!!



Quotes from the ad:

"These MP's are combat support soldiers, trained to fight. Then, also trained as Internment Resettlement Specialists, to control and supervise detainees, to ensure their humane treatment, and to assist them in returning to a productive life..."

--Think about it.... working in your home country, helping your fellow Americans get back to their productive lives! What could be more fulfilling than putting a homeless, Muslim, or elderly civilian out of their misery? This!

"For this job, the army will train you to use specialized equipment to monitor activity, to conduct searches, and to inspect areas where prisoners work and live..."

--How cool is that.... the army will actually train us to use specialized equipment to monitor AND conduct searches, it's like being the TSA... AND a soldier!

"...you'll train to in-process prisoners and detainees, and to brief them on their Rights..."

--I mean really, how many Rights do they need? A brief description of their entire list of Rights should be sufficient. They are getting free donuts, have supervised visitation, can play Football, have forced exercise, play poker, mow lawns, all completely supervised in a humane manner, to preserve their dignity.

"You'll train to conduct prisoner formations and roll calls, to monitor their exercise, recreation, and work areas..."

--Structure is important, I'm sure everyone agrees with that. Stand up straight, look people in the eyes, and forced exercise to keep those American tummies trimmed and fit. It's like being on the Biggest Loser X 2, for free!! Teaching people how to take pride in their work areas is a great skill, because your cheap labor will build lots of character when you are finally released back to your productive lives in a competitive economy!

"After your initial entry training and advanced individual training, you'll work long hours, day or night, in a garrison or field environment..."

--How many Americans already have 2-3 jobs and have no "individual training"?

"Serving in this MOS can help you transition from the military to the civilian employment sector, in the military police corps you'll be providing both combat support and law enforcement where ever you go..."

--If I've said it once I've said it a million times... there's nothing quite like going from combat to police force employment. You'd be 10 steps ahead of the rest of the force at the start, they'd all be looking to you for wisdom and Urban Warfare experienced guidance. These are tough times we live in, you never know when combat training could mean the difference between life & death in the Walmart or McDonald's parking lots!

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I personally found this ad to be a bit bland and intimidating, which is only going to hurt their numbers of Internment Resettlement Specialist applicants in the long run.

I don't really contribute much to this world, so I decided to take action!
So I remade their ad to be more appealing to the average American commoner looking for respectable career opportunities serving their country.

Feel free to spread these far & wide.
These are some of my favorites....


www.youtube.com...


www.youtube.com...


www.youtube.com...


www.youtube.com...

Check my signature link for more.

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If you've made it this far, I'd like to welcome you back to Earth.

If you listened to the original ad and/or read the quoted text of it, you may or may not have noticed the keywords I put in bold, but your brain sure did. That brain processed the keywords that were repeated and when you think back to this memory in the future, those keywords will define your entire memory of that ad.

Is it just me, or should this not get lost or forgotten in the archives of American insanity?

reply to post by JibbyJedi


And They love you, all expenses included.

I think things will get that bad you will be begging for FEMA to take you in.

In fact I may sign up lets look at the benefits.

.Armed guards to watch over you
.All you can eat
.Free medical and dental
.No more tax to pay
.exercise routine.

And many more im booking my place right now.

(this one had a headline saying jews were leaving Sweden because it was unsafe for them there.)







en.wikipedia.org...

en.wikipedia.org...

artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com...

Because only America has crazy people and idiots.

I didn't think the prospect could be improved upon until you guys pointed out the fact about "free living" expenses. How attractive is that to the average American hovering around the poverty level and considering a career in domestic terrorism?

Are you trying to imply that FEMA is somehow related to military police and military prisons?

How do you get to this conclusion?

It's not cool to fear monger you know...despite the cheap flags you'll get.

reply to post by Mr Headshot

Because only America has crazy people and idiots.

I never said we were the only country, but we do have shows like Jersey Shore and Kourtney and Kim Take New York... give credit where credit is due. We are world leaders in many areas.

reply to post by Chadwickus


He's not fear mongering, he's paranoid. He actually believes this crap, and thinks it's still important.

reply to post by JibbyJedi


In my best dumb American voice: Man screw this thread, thirty seconds, that's almost a third of an entire minute!



I've actually seen these videos before and indeed it does seem rather eerie to see this put out as a possible job for people. It's funny the detached way they talk about it.

The power to suspend the Constitution and detain folks indefinitely is not something new. Everyone, I'm sure, knows about what happened to the Japanese-Americans just after Pearl Harbor. Constitution or not in an emergency the government is going to do what it thinks it needs to do for its own survival, if that means rounding up American citizens for forced relocation no piece of paper is ever going to stop them. Of course they only use these powers in an emergency, and only use these sorts of prisons for military prisoners (supposedly). The apocalyptic FEMA camp epidemic reported by most conspiracy types, complete with coffins, is over-hyped nonsense.

If only we had one of those by the people for the people governments instead of a den of bought out thieves

reply to post by JibbyJedi


It's all been disproven in THIS thread. At least that's what I was told!! Apparently they do not exist and anyone who believes they do is a fearmonger with a tin foil hat!

IMO FEMA camps are active across the country. The only question is - WHO ARE THEY INTENDED FOR??

So when in a re-education camp, do we play dumb?

Kinda curious on this....

If we have high IQ do we try to join the collective?

Thoughts?

Originally posted by Chadwickus
Are you trying to imply that FEMA is somehow related to military police and military prisons?

How do you get to this conclusion?

It's not cool to fear monger you know...despite the cheap flags you'll get.

If this world has any respect for itself left, I shouldn't get that many stars & flags to even make it worth my while. How did I get to this conclusion? Listen to the ad as many times as it takes for the WTF to kick in. How does this ad seem even slightly necessary in a world where martial law isn't a remote possibility whatsoever? What is the point of it if it's just a small percentage possible contingency plan by the military?

How am I fear mongering when the ad itself does enough on it's own?

reply to post by JibbyJedi


We also invented the damned PC and mass produced the car.

reply to post by JibbyJedi
Yay! FEMA camps!.

Will we learn how to canoe? Make ashtrays out of clay? Archery? Camp fire sing-a-longs?

Okay. Sorry.

With 10's of thousands of troops returning, and unemployment still sky high, what better way to put them back to work than with imprisonment of the populace that disagrees with policy?

Silly elections!
Silly Constitution!
Silly freedoms and Bill of Rights!

We're talkin' jobs! man! Jobs!

Originally posted by litterbaux
So when in a re-education camp, do we play dumb?

Kinda curious on this....

If we have high IQ do we try to join the collective?

Thoughts?

Got High IQ?
*BANG*

There will be no Mensa meetings in the camps, or in any military police division assigned to the camps, I assure you.

Originally posted by Mr Headshot
reply to post by JibbyJedi

 

We also invented the damned PC

Kinda ironic you are using a PC to post this complaint.

reply to post by JibbyJedi


so play dum

reply to post by JibbyJedi


But how can an ad for military police and military prisons which are for military prisoners relate to citizens?

What part does FEMA play in it?

How are those activated FEMA camps in all 50 states going??

The round up must have begun by now, surely...why else would they be activated?

reply to post by litterbaux


I wasn't complaining about the PC. Learn subtlety in regards to language.
I said damned because you're using an American invention to bash America. Also, the internet exists, largely, thanks to us. If it wasn't for us, ARPANET wouldn't have happened. GG.

Originally posted by seabag
reply to post by JibbyJedi

 

It's all been disproven in THIS thread. At least that's what I was told!! Apparently they do not exist and anyone who believes they do is a fearmonger with a tin foil hat!

IMO FEMA camps are active across the country. The only question is - WHO ARE THEY INTENDED FOR??

Well going by the vocabulary of the ad, it is intended for Americans. Stationed in garrisons or field environments, whatever that means, and helping "prisoners" return to productive lives? Is that our role currently overseas with "prisoners and detainees" or is that what we do in America only?

They are intended for the Black Friday and Nike Jordan sneaker sale crowds primarily, and encompassing "cheap labor" as they state they will have "work environments" to maintain.

Do we really need to get Alex Jones to translate this from new speak to English for the layman?