posted on Jan, 18 2012 @ 05:18 AM
Much as I believe fully in reincarnation knowing a lot of my past lives and obviously from that the proof that we do come back, I still fear death
because I'm leaving behind my loved ones and giving them so much horrific grief when I do die. And, despite believing in reincarnation and knowing my
past lives, part of me still sits here and debates against my own beliefs saying "But what if that's just a belief that you hold NOW and it's not
really true? What then? What if reincarnation is just in your mind? What's going to happen when you die?"
It's one thing to hold an opinion. It's another to be able to question your own personal beliefs and keep striving for answers.
But we can't really /do/ that.
Because no one knows for sure. No one can sit here and say with certainty they KNOW 100% with no room for doubt what happens when we die. We all have
our own opinions. Some say Heaven. Some say reincarnation. Some say a void. Some say we just turn to dust and it's lights out, black nothing for
eternity. Some say we're energy and we go on to .... something. Some say what we personally believe is what is going to happen to that individual.
No one knows. As much as I do believe in reincarnation, as much as I do believe in those stories of near death experiences, I still have to question
and wonder if my beliefs are based on fact or based on a hope to make the prospect of death easier to handle. I think for the latter, that's the best
way to do it, to face it. It's inevitable. I'm not comfortable believing that we fade to dust and are nothing so I choose to hold to the
reincarnation theory. It may be right, it may be fallacy, but it tames my fear of dying somewhat. The fear is still there.
And that fear extends to our loved ones. We don't hear them, see them, smell their scent, can't hold them anymore, can't say or hear 'I love you'
from them ever again, anything you want to apologize for will never be heard (or will it?) and that's god awful frightening to have to face even
though we ALL face it second hand or personally. But we want our loved ones to stay with us as long as possible cuz that kind of goodbye really
freaking SUCKS. It isn't like they're going on a holiday to another Country and will be back in 3 weeks. It's a forever, never see you again ever
kind of good bye to where you can't even call them or write them or nothing. Ever. And so we do what we can to keep our loved ones breathing and able
to function in this plane of existance with us as long as we can. I know people who clung to hope and kept their loved ones on ventilators for YEARS
when they were clinically dead, just because of hope to hear their voice again, see them look at them and know who they were, just HOPE to have their
loved one back.
Ever have to make that choice to take a loved one off a ventilator and know they're going to die and you can not do any thing about it? I have
witnessed it from my friends family and even that was SO hard for me. It's like, so many questions: if we wait another day, they could pull through.
If we pull the plug, are we playing God? do we have the right to say when they should die or not? And I hope to GOD i never EVER have to face that
decision with any of my loved ones. I'd never pull the plug. I'd have that hope that they'd wake and would be fine. I'd NEVER be able to live with
myself if I let them turn off the machines; I'd forever think "maybe a few minutes waiting and they would have woken up."
so maybe this answers your questions. maybe not. There are so many ways to answer your question that no two answers will be the same. They can't be.
We all live this and experience it so differently. Death is a dance that has a different song, dance, step and pattern for each person on Earth and as
we grow, it changes for each of us as well.