Originally posted by Aeons
reply to post by fnpmitchreturns
If the piece of paper means nothing, then it means nothing to you to sign it.
You're basing your argument on that point, and in my opinion, that point is beside the point. If that makes any sense.
If the piece of paper legally stating that you're married means nothing to you, then it means nothing to YOU. That's not to say though that it
doesn't mean something to SOCIETY at large. because it does. To society it means that you can share benefits, and upon divorce or death, legally
share assets. That's it. At the end of the day, a marriage certificate has nothing to do with love, and I think that's what fnpmitchreturns was
trying to get at.
Here we are, 2012, and society at large is still under the impression that marriage=love. It doesn't. Pre-nuptual agreements should be enough to
prove THAT point. I don't know who I feel for the most; the people who are married who claim they're in love simply because they're married, or all
the people who believe that. This, I think, is one of those old fashioned values, laws if you will, that are outdated and have no use in this society.
Kind of like one of those old west laws that states that it's illegal to shoe your horse on Saturday on Main St., or some such nonsense. If anything,
it can be a very unhealthy way of thinking.
Marriage started out as a notion that for 2 people to truely be in love they had to take vows before God to consecrate their union. To make being
together "right" in the eyes of God. I find it fascinating that as each year goes by it is proven that less and less people believe in God in the
traditional sense, the sense that started this whole marriage business, while at the same time the divorce rate goes up. And while all that this is
going on, people still want to cling to the notion that marriage is some sort of sacred union that shouldn't be touched by anyone else. Meaning that
if another man or woman came onto a married couples' scene and sparks started to fly, it would be frowned upon by society. Both the person
"tempting" one of the married people as well one of the married people would both be looked down upon as not doing the the "right thing". Sorry,
but if the one married person was truely in love, they wouldn't have been looking in the first place.
So no, this makes absolutely no sense to me. It didn't make sense to me 20 years ago and it STILL doesn't. The real crime in this case is societies
pre-concieved and ill fitting notions that the institute of marraige itself is more important than love. And to me, that speaks VOLUMES about
organized religion and how stifling to our spiritual growth it really is.
Don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are plenty of people who are both truely in love AND married. All I'm saying is don't assume that just because
two people are married, they're in love. There's a difference. And on top of that, just because you're in love when you get married doesn't mean
you're going to stay in love. Sorry, but love isn't dictated by a piece of paper. Your benefits are.
I should know.
So why did I get married if I'm so strongly against it? Let's just say that sometimes there is no arguing with a woman. Even if you feel that
something like marriage for the sake of it is wrong; she's right. If you've never been in those shoes, it's hard to explain it better than that.
To the OP: Don't concern yourself with marriage. Concern yourself with love. If you fall in love with someone THEN want to get married, go for it.
But love is more important. And hopefully these words of advice will keep you from confusing the two like so many people today seem to.
Deny Ignorance friend.
Personal disclosure: Sorry for the rant. The underlying reason why I went off like that is because all this marraige business, and that's exactly
what it is; a business, comes down to organized religion. The people who have been here a long time know how I feel about it and how it can get under
my skin from time to time.