The Yearning (YWC)
"How I came to my Personal Beliefs."

This is my demented word cubism explanation of my beliefs.
Good luck … strap in …. (remember .. think cubism but with words )

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Life is Chaotic Color.

From living life I have come to believe
life is feelings and reactions which are energy and color.
Chaotic color. Every color. Every combination of color.
colors = feelings = energies = colors = feelings = energies
Swirling like clouds in a hurricane.
Floating like jelly fish in the ocean.
Changing like a kaleidoscope without boundaries.

A purpose to it all?
Why? Does there need to be?
Maybe. Hope so.

Green.
The beginning? BANG! ?!?
A wave of an omnipotent hand ?!?
Life from nothing? The end – back to nothing from life?
Is there an end? I’m thinking not.

Gold.
Ghosts. Spirits. Shades.
Entities. Sightings. Signs.
Vibrations raised. OBE. NDE.
Multi universes, multi dimensions.
How’d I get stuck in this one?
Seems there is more than just ‘this’.

Yellow.
Who is in Charge?
Does Someone have to be?
A loving ‘Father’?
Bald children dying in Cancer wards.
Broken hearted woman miscarry.
Born just to starve in Africa.
Orphan, Widow, Widower.
“Dad’s taking a nap.

Blue.
‘Someone’ is there.
Sometimes it seems so. Miracles!
Marie-Paul Stevens was cured!
But Tanya wasn’t.
Owen Lives! But Robin didn’t.
Some miracles happened!
Some miracles never came.
So, someone is there. Sometimes at least.

Brown.
Reincarnation. Come back here?
Pains of being born – AGAIN.
Pains of adolescence – AGAIN.
Pains of illness; of tonsils; of toothaches – AGAIN.
Pains of braces and glasses – AGAIN.
Pains of loss and disease – AGAIN.
Pains of broken heart and fatigue – AGAIN.
Too depressing. No thanks.

“There is a reason for everything”
“We just can’t see the whole situation”
That’s what ‘they’ say. ‘Oh really?’ I say back.
Why does new life go to those who abort
but then others who pray for a baby are childless?
Oh … don’t get me started. Big dark purple smudge.

Jesus. Buddha. Gandhi. Sparkling silver burst.
Neda Agha-Soltan. Martin Luther King Junior. Maroon teardrops.
Edith Stein. Adolph Hitler. A burst of bright warm white against a pocket of deep black.
The balance of a painters palette? Ying and Yang?
The randomness of a child’s spin art toy?

Green and full of life. Red and angry.
Blue and peaceful Orange and full of disease.
Swirling and changing altogether and yet separate.

Life. Playing a board game.
Not knowing the rules or the goal.
Who came up with this game?
It won’t sell well on Black Friday.

Colors; shifting and swirling.
Never on solid ground and can’t be touched.
Tried to wrap my head around it.
Just gave myself headache after headache.
Took some asprin.
Found out that color can’t be ‘wrapped around’.
So they still shift and swirl.
When I’m just all color … then I’ll know.
But for now … no more trying to 'wrap around' and no more headaches.

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At this time and from living life I’ve come to believe
– life is feelings and reactions which are energy and color.
Like I said .. demented word cubism.
But that’s where I am.

there should be a rule banning art students from ATS

Originally posted by Lucifersjester
there should be a rule banning art students from ATS

I'm a 50 year old stay at home mom ... with a degree in psychology.

Originally posted by FlyersFan

Originally posted by Lucifersjester
there should be a rule banning art students from ATS

I'm a 50 year old stay at home mom ... with a degree in psychology.

I liked the Cubism aspect of it, but I enjoyed more how well you expressed the theme of this contest and that it wasn't exactly in prose.

Well done, FlyersFan!

I do want to ask you though, are you a synesthete? I am to some degree both a grapheme synesthete and a sound synesthete.

Originally posted by FlyersFan

Answer ... I don't know. I'd have to know more about it to be able to tell. Take a test or something. From the write up here I can say I match what they say about numbers and time and calendar for sure ...

Thanks for bringing it up. Having never heard of it I'll have to look into it.

I think more people have it than is realized. It's just not as strong in some people. For me it's fairly strong, but not like some of the case studies done. Anyway, your writing made me think that you were one, that is why I asked.

I often get annoyed with certain corporate logo words because they are the wrong color to me. Taco Bell especially annoys me, the words "Taco Bell" are supposed to be Green, not Purple.

You got me. Flag.

I read your entry before I checked your profile. I flagged after I read. Then I viewed your profile. Gasp.

Excellent entry. I was satisfied by reading.

You got me as well.

If your writing is cubism then this story must be 'Les Demoiselles' by Picasso.

To tell a story is one thing but to invent a whole new writing style is something else entirely. SnF

A very prolific mind altering explanation of the colors that come in waves and affect you and each one of us daily!!!

I love what you did here. I hope you become enveloped in the best colors the Universe will allow. Now and always.

May they all mean happiness and health!!