I am a 25yr old White Male in UK, and I have been diagnosed with HIV :(

I have lived with HIV for 19 yrs and would have been dead by 2000 if not for anti-retroviral medications. Every day you cease taking the medications, your viral load goes up. This has massive implications for your immune system (reduces all your natural defenses - CD4, CD8, etc), your endocrine system (a high viral load plays havoc with your hormones, particularly corticosteriods), your brain (the virus can cross the blood brain barrier and lay dormant in the brain) and just about all your vital organs (increased viral load leads to increased inflammatory responses in the body - effectively your age much faster with a higher viral load). On top of all this, you have an increased liklihood of contracting a variety of cancers (liver, skin, and pancreatic) if you don't get you viral load down to below detection (which mine has been for 15 of the 19 yrs). So PLEASE go and see a doctor who has lots of experience in HIV/AIDS and develop a relationship with him/her. They will be able to explore your needs in great detail to tailor a drug regime for you. You are still young and you deserve to give yourself a good life. My generation of gay men died so that we could enjoy the social and emotional benefits younger gay men experience to day. Don't let their efforts and deaths be in vane...

it's really quite disturbing that there are such judgemental, nasty people posting in this thread, .. i have no doubt that people like them wouldn't say these things openly to anybody, rather hide behind the anonymity of a keyboard to get their own little bit of 'attention'. adults? i think not.

sorry to hear about your diagnosis OP...i spend a lot of time online and in my years of online travelling i've found a few things that might, or might not, be relevant.... that's for you to judge if you want to.

www.youtube.com... a lecture given by dr bob beck, very relevant. i've heard of positive results.

www.youtube.com... another very logical idea.

and i've also heard about the acid/alkali theory too.

i hope they're of some use and ignore the horrible excuses for human beings that are trolling your thread too

I'm sorry this happened to you.

What was it like contacting and informing every sex partner you've already had as to your status?

Thanks for your story OP.

I'm also a gay male who has been living with HIV for 8 years, but I've had no AIDS defining conditions, and my CD4 count is still within normal range. I certainly agree that you do not have to be promiscuous to get HIV, and stereotyping HIV-positive people like that is a part of what leads people to be careless with their own behavior. Stigma makes us think that HIV is the problem of "those bad people", and the irony is I also used to think like that, instead of making sure I was safe in every situation.

We have 6 million people living with HIV/AIDS in SA.
The virus was at first ignored during some crucial stages, and many people did not understand it at all.
The most affected population group are heterosexual women, which means that mother-to-child transmission, as well as AIDS-orphans and child headed households, were a big problem.

Since 1996 it's been quite a struggle to get the new medications, and at first only the rich, or people on medical insurance (including those in the government) had access to them.
The virus also took an economic toll as it killed productive adults, with high rates amongst nurses, teachers and the army.

President Thabo Mbeki became convinced through some conspiracy theories that poor nutrition, rather than HIV caused AIDS.
He also believed that the medicines were toxic, and for a whole decade we got no clear message on HIV prevention from leadership whatsoever.
Apart from some pilot projects run by foreign aid groups, the ANC refused to supply the drugs, and told us that a mixture of breakfast cereal, lemon juice, olive oil, beetroot and garlic would cure AIDS.
Essentially 300 000 people were left to die in that period.
Today it's been mooted that we should have a truth commission to understand how a middle-income country that was offered the ARVs on a platter failed it's people so badly.
Some blame it on internalized stigma, and Mbeki's view that AIDS was based on colonial myths about "unbridled African sexuality".

Since Mbeki was removed from power in 2008 things are going better, although there are still religious groups pushing unclear messages on condoms, and a range of con-men peddling useless and unproven products, but luckily the biggest crackpots left the country. One of these crooks even sold a single ARV as a vitamin pill, which works for a short time, but the virus finds it's way around it.
Currently not everybody who needs ARVs gets them, but the situation is better, and mother-to-child transmissions are much reduced.
At least many people can put food on the table and support their families.
Leaving people with AIDS untreated leaves them with a hyper-infectious viral load, as well as with mental problems that can cause further harm.
The social strain of caring for a person dying of AIDS is also tremendous.

I'm certainly open to the idea that HIV was man-made, and was also spread by Polio vaccines grown in monkey organs in central Africa.

At least here coming out as HIV-positive is seen as commendable, because it's only by public advocacy that the stigma and denial can be addressed, and people can be honest with themselves and their partners. A lot of celebrities have already done so, although there's probably a lot more in government who could do so.
Some are still in denial, while con-man preachers tell people they are healed from AIDS.

I followed the diffuse arguments of the denialists at first, but I've seen the medications work, even the limited 6 cocktails available by state clinics here (and in Western countries there are many more). I've discussed that issue ad nauseam on ATS, and if people want to believe that diets or vitamins can cure them that's fine with me - nobody is forced to take ARVs.

All the best, and I do hope you check with your doctor before stopping medication so that the virus doesn't develop resistance, but I've heard of some people who can stop when an AIDS-defining condition has cleared up and their CD4 count is still high (above 350 in SA). I assume you proceeded with the knowledge of your doctor.

Don't worry about people who say you brought it on yourself and don't deserve treatment - we still have some people like that here, and we just remind them that a lot of medical expenses are due to carelessness and risky behavior. It's a bit like saying we shouldn't help shark attack victims, because everyone in SA knows that swimming in the sea is dangerous; or that rugby can cause spinal injuries; or that the sun can cause skin cancer; or that a bad diet causes heart diseases.
Arguments like that have never been helpful, and just make people fatalistic and unwilling to know their status.
The activism and clinical work done by brave Western people in the face of continual stigma has already saved and improved the lives of millions of people in poorer nations.

reply to post by MaMaa


Well I'm 21 and my tally is at 6, which is a lot less than a good portion of my peers; this is universal afaik.

We need to care about each other. I've had a number of friends die from HIV. They were all negative about their disease. Please try to stay positive. I've engaged in risky behaviors in the past. I'm bisexual.(I'm negative, I've had myself tested five times.) One of my best friends(who was straight), died of cancer. Thing was, after he got done with chemotherapy and radiation, he didn't have an immune system So the cancer that was in him, took over. He wasn't positive about it.So maybe that's why he died. Stay positive, please stay positive. An aside, I take flaxseed oil. I haven't been sick since I started taking it. It's been quite awhile almost two years.

I wish you well OP.

I am amazed by your recovery from such a serious cancer and think you should be inspired and encouraged that with the help of doctors, boosted by your remaining potent healing capacities, perhaps your diagnosis of HIV+ isn't necessarily a death sentence.

I think with a VERY healthy diet and exercise your chances for survival are better than they would be just taking the medicine (which you stopped taking) alone. Pretty much every drug that is tried and tested on people goes thru clinical trials in which a factor for placebo effect is taken into account. Nearly every disease has shown positive improvements due to the placebo effect. I don't think HIV/AIDS is immune (completely) from the potency of the placebo effect.

Being at peace with yourself and your decisions will help to endure this disease. Sharing hope with others and continuing to grow(mentally, emotionally, spiritually) can also contribute to your wellness and longevity. maybe listening to your doctors can help too....

I don't know you but it's not my place to condemn your decisions or lifestyle choices, but from one human to another, I wish you well, with all my heart. Share the strength you have with others, remove doubts and insecurities from your life, keep learning, keep asking questions, there is strength in curiosity (because it lacks doubt) and cast out dogma from your life.

Be well......

I forgot to ask, have you been able to check your sexual history to see if you infected other partners?

I'm just trying to understand how 1 in 3 gays have HIV (in American cities), to me it seems like a quiet, supressed pandemic as they go about and o their business like handshakes or whatever.

here is an Indonesian herbalist who claims he can heal HIV via natural medication and therapy

news about him (use google translate)

his website: www.akarpinang.com (currently down though)

He cured my mom of a paralyzed arm, caused by stroke and i know of a little girl who had a tumor and also got healed.

You have done very well. Congratulations. Sometimes we are not very good at self-compassion/patting ourselves on the back and telling ourselves how well we have done. Some people with severe Hodgkins lose their lives suddenly.

The thing about returning to health is that hatred or resentment comes in. This is a killer. Instead of the opposite of being grateful for life one despairs. Why me? Self-pity follows.

Most diseases are incurable. It depends on what time of life we are hit by them. Drugs can make it easier.

The current approach to patients by most good doctors is called ICE - what are the patient`s ideas, concerns and expectations.

Your ideas on man-made viruses and big pharma are shared by many on this site.

Yours concerns are shared by many on this site.

What are your expectations if you stop all of the drugs completely?

You may become quite ill. Why not discuss the side-effects with your quack and keep your immunity up?

Your views on life may change dramatically over the next decade. All feelings do pass or something like that.

I always remember Aleister Crowley the most evil man in the world who fell in love in his 60s and became remorseful for feeling so bad in his earlier years.

You sound so compassionate that it is most likely that you will fall in love again.

I read somewhere awhile ago that back in the 70's in New York doctors where doing a study on gay men giving them Hepatitis B shots, but really was HIV. HIV has been around long enough to know you should be protecting yourself especially with gay sex. Hope you stay well.

Originally posted by Frontkjemper
reply to post by benjamin2012

 

And this is WHY we have condoms. Sorry OP, I really am sorry for the situation you are in. But you know damn well that unprotected sex is never a good idea unless you both have been tested. (This goes for heterosexual's as well, but double for homosexuals.)

You played Russian roulette with ten men. You bit the bullet. Hopefully someone else will learn from your mistakes.

Actually HIV can indeed pass through pours in a condom. They do decrease the chance of infection but by no means ''safe sex'' just ''less risky''. Lamb Skins certainly don't. Unless you were told that you would assume them safe.....if you're allergic to latex (not at all uncommon trust me on this) lamb skin would be your first thought as an alternative.
FDA
As long as he has done right by not spreading it, then it's not really our business. I'm sure OP has thought long and hard about what should have been done....easy to think that anytime anything is said and done.
Hope all goes well for you OP. Thanks for sharing your story. S&F

I predicted at the start of this thread we would get Religious nuts,experts in health care,people trying to get custom for some hippie with a bag of herbs......right again.But like I said,any life confessions I had would not be made on here.

In fact posting private details on Ats would be like asking a dog not to lick.

Originally posted by Schwalbe
you fail to mention how you became infected? if through sex you seem not to be worried about if you have passed it on!

edit on 5-1-2012 by Schwalbe because: (no reason given)

Come on. Why you trying to make a dying man feel guilty? It's probably crossed his mind already why you need to hang a neon sign over it?

It is manmade. You'd be surprised what Big Pharma infects you with just so you have to go to the doctor to buy the medications to treat what they infected you with.

Btw, avian flu is now transmitting to humans and its said to be worse than swine flu. I had swine flu and i had a 103.4 fever for 7 days straight in the nights. i can see how it kills kids and older people, i had to constantly be drinking fluids because i was puking and sh*tting everywhere and that was when i had the energy to get off the couch and crawl to the toilet.

reply to post by ignant


The chart is not human. Man when I grew up in the 70-80's as a local on the finest Cali beach, sex was as natural as breathing. It is ignorance which causes charts to be reality over nature. Sex is beautiful and for most people more is better in a lifespan, you would die if you knew my count by 25...

Originally posted by ignant

Originally posted by antar
reply to post by ignant

 

10 is NOT that many, what planet are you from Judge?

The OP at 25yo is a living proof of why is it.

Besides, by definition, 2 is a couple, 3-4 is a few, 5-7 is several, 8+ is many, no?

I go away for a couple of hours and you guys all start hating again! lol 10 sexual partners by 25 is nothing. I had 10 (consensual experiences) by the time I was 16 and don't even get me started on how many I was forced to lay with...which is in the many hundreds sadly and fortunately the worst that happened to be was a dose of the seaside nippers and many sore throats...

In this day and age people should be less prudish about such things and realise that the world is a different place nowadays. And we're different too; all of us...we just have to embrace that difference and roll with it as the mediocre band Oasis would have said.

Rev

reply to post by benjamin2012


May I apologize on behalf of all those who first did not congratulate you. Your journey has been one of sanctification. Your acceptance of this path and the strength you find daily is evidence of the divinity of man and his limitless power. We can overcome the most "soul" crushing turns of "fate" if we put our faith first, in our own abaility to endure. May hate never find you again and may love continue to find you.

Philodemus

I'm not being a wise guy but are people giving stars to this because of your recovery or are people giving you stars because you are no longer taking your medication..personally I think you are being selfish if you stop taking your aids medicine...not sure what you are taking but your not only living for you but you are living for your parents...don't be a dope in saying if I die I die or it was meant to be....meet with your doctor and discuss some alternatives to your medication...the bulk of people living with aids are doing very well...you may want to look into steroid treatment to strengthen your immune system...you made a mistake now don't make it worse and regardless if it's man made or not that's not the issue...your friends and family want you around a long time...