Soldiers of the world, except American soldiers,...this is for you

I am a stone in the ground. I am a stone sinking in a sea of lies. I am the heavy truth of my burden in its tomb . I look to my table and see the barren fields that fill it not. I look to my children, see them bare before the cold winters and the scorching sun. I hear then in the distance, the drum of war. I hear then in the sky the roar of thunder. I turn to my family and see them die day by day. I see the barren field filled then with warriors. I see then the scorching sun darkened by wave after wave of falling fire. I run and flee for my mortality is very present to me now. I see my children struck down and their blood is a river. I see my home as it was when I close my eyes, I open them and see but ruin. Hate fills me. Hate for all my enemies that wish to see my death.
My eyes are not watching as I seek to fill the void that was my life with the corpses of my enemies piled high. I find them in our homes. I find them eating our food. I find them ravaging our women. I hate them. I seek not understanding anymore. I seek not to live in this world any more...I seek to understand their weakness as they have known mine....I seek to kill their world as they have killed mine. I seek the end of my horror..I seek the end of this anguish....I will end it or end my unbearable burden...I will speak of death to those that have it offered....I seek MY peace.

Man, NY must be tough these days.


I can tell a lot of feeling went into this so... good job.
I'm not so sure what you are getting at by excluding American troops, but whatever floats your boat.

If I don't glorify American troops like F-ing angels they get all prissy and say I offend them......so this is done in a way that no one gets offended....they are excluded and don't have to feel like sissies when they read poetry that doesn't sound like it came from a recruitment center.....

I wrote a poem the other day in tribute to ALL soldiers....and ended getting the redneck 3rd degree from my own people. so F-em


and yes....NY is HELL....I love it

Do not edit staff actions

Someone is clearly angry and biased. Hate is a poison, a cancer in your soul and you would do well to abandon it and learn the path of forgiveness and love. His name is written within my signature, he is the chain breaker, the equalizer, the freedom fighter. He slays with his words and his kindness is his justice, all men are equal under the same master and no one is ever alone.

reply to post by newyorkee


can you translate that into something that makes sense ?

Here we go .......
Nice poem .....again
Yet again though you are looking through biased blinkered eyes
I enjoyed your previous poem but believed to address it to the soldiers of the world was a bit far
Now you go and do it again ( however excluding US troops )
AGAIN NOT ALL SOLDIERS FEEL LIKE THIS - a very very small percentage infact
Just to clarify a little and I'm now going to go against many of my own rules and do a little self revealing
I'm a soldier - not American ( presumption is the mother of all f#%k ups )
I had my first experience of armed conflict in 91 at the age of 14 ( why my nan ways went yugoslavia and thought yugoslavia was gonna be fine ........whoops ! )
I joined an elite infantry unit at 17 straight out of school - split my knee cap and had to leave - spent 5 years living as a civie then joined another considered elite infantry unit at 22
I have nearly 1000 days of combat operations and have lost many good friends
Been married for 14 years and have a 13 year old son
Yes I have PTSD but I'm also a TRIM manager ( mental trauma assessor and manager ) To use a rather cheesy quote with reference to being a soldier 'I didn't choose anything - I was born and this is what I am'
I am as are many a professional soldier - soldiering is my profession
Do not think for a second that this limits my poetry prose to simply
Roses are red , violets are blue
I'm schizophrenic, and so am I
We are not all darkened tainted products of the killbot factory
Some are failed by the system though either not being weeded out in the training process, missing elements from the training process or are not properly addressed on return from operations
Until you've layed down next to your buddy as he's holding his own face on so he doesn't need to look up to any man - he shouldn't have to look up to any man ! As the lights go dim you cannot comprehend what a soldier may or may not feel so I reiterate my response to your former poem
I feel insulted by this
Not everyone's cut out to be a soldier - its not f%#king call of duty
And for you to feel hurt becose some was insulted by your narrow minded poem , tarred with the same brush and insulting of my profession, attitude, mentality, humanity and psychological state tells me all I need
Chk the sig

Sorry I must add
Your in America, you state these poems are from countless testimonials and friends
American soldiers ?
Please just take a step back and look at your posts poems and comments
Have you ever even spoken to a soldier from the Africa's, Europe, the former soviet states, mid east, far east, australiasia ?
Please do not think I'm trying to burn you or insult you in any way but your perception of soldiers is clouded and biased and you sound intelligent enough to realise this

WTF?

talk about twisted minds:shk:

how anybody can think OP is describing a soldiers POV

prose poem is written from a victim of war's POV

jesus wept:shk:

Originally posted by Neocrusader
Here we go .......
Nice poem .....again
Yet again though you are looking through biased blinkered eyes
I enjoyed your previous poem but believed to address it to the soldiers of the world was a bit far
Now you go and do it again ( however excluding US troops )
AGAIN NOT ALL SOLDIERS FEEL LIKE THIS - a very very small percentage infact
Just to clarify a little and I'm now going to go against many of my own rules and do a little self revealing
I'm a soldier - not American ( presumption is the mother of all f#%k ups )
I had my first experience of armed conflict in 91 at the age of 14 ( why my nan ways went yugoslavia and thought yugoslavia was gonna be fine ........whoops ! )
I joined an elite infantry unit at 17 straight out of school - split my knee cap and had to leave - spent 5 years living as a civie then joined another considered elite infantry unit at 22
I have nearly 1000 days of combat operations and have lost many good friends
Been married for 14 years and have a 13 year old son
Yes I have PTSD but I'm also a TRIM manager ( mental trauma assessor and manager ) To use a rather cheesy quote with reference to being a soldier 'I didn't choose anything - I was born and this is what I am'
I am as are many a professional soldier - soldiering is my profession
Do not think for a second that this limits my poetry prose to simply
Roses are red , violets are blue
I'm schizophrenic, and so am I
We are not all darkened tainted products of the killbot factory
Some are failed by the system though either not being weeded out in the training process, missing elements from the training process or are not properly addressed on return from operations
Until you've layed down next to your buddy as he's holding his own face on so he doesn't need to look up to any man - he shouldn't have to look up to any man ! As the lights go dim you cannot comprehend what a soldier may or may not feel so I reiterate my response to your former poem
I feel insulted by this
Not everyone's cut out to be a soldier - its not f%#king call of duty
And for you to feel hurt becose some was insulted by your narrow minded poem , tarred with the same brush and insulting of my profession, attitude, mentality, humanity and psychological state tells me all I need
Chk the sig

edit on 1-1-2012 by Neocrusader because: Bloody auto correct

U MAD BRO?
you seem well versed in all the things you are not, denial much?

Neocrusader? lol frozen adolescence

reply to post by newyorkee


You do know "America" is more than one country don't you?
In fact, there are TWO Americas, one north one south, they are continents that home many countries.
Do you exclude all of these, or might you need to change your title?
So much for deep thought?

reply to post by DerepentLEstranger


Sorry dude but you seem to have come into a discussion which was touched on in another thread
However as stated by the op

"If I don't glorify American troops like F-ing angels they get all prissy and say I offend them......so this is done in a way that no one gets offended....they are excluded and don't have to feel like sissies when they read poetry that doesn't sound like it came from a recruitment center.....

I wrote a poem the other day in tribute to ALL soldiers....and ended getting the redneck 3rd degree from my own people. so F-em "

Now if you would kindly check this former topic you might understand some of my comments as I was one of only a few commenters on that post I can't help but feel this was somehow directed in my direction ( hey call me paranoid)
Now I reiterate I'm a soldier .....not a poet
But the poster having so much experience and conducted so much research into this subject matter must accept that SOLDIERS ....that these threads are directed too indeed dedicated too are going to be subject to scrutiny by those very soldiers
If this had been posted on a poetry site then I believe it would recieve great praise, but this isn't a poetry site
Poetry or not these poems have been posted in a way to target a set audience .........that audience disagrees ( well I do )

If I am wrong in this then in answer to your question
U MAD BRO?

Yep probably

reply to post by newyorkee


Very nice poem, but to reiterate your earlier point that you left Americans out because they harrassed you last time, it seems that logic has done the opposite to what you would like.

I made the mistake to originally write something creative on a paranormal /conspiracy site. I saw it as a public forum where people of different backgrounds met and shared culture.....

I did speak to people who knew what they were talking about....I am currently in Spain and .....a country where a bloody civil war ravaged and splintered this country......spit families in 2.....my own included.....a time where brothers would kill each other....sons their fathers.....a time that filled this land with mass graves of countless nameless people, put there by other people that differed only in political ideology......

Not one person I have spoken to here since my childhood up to now......has ever been ok with the things they did to each other.....rapes......murders.....it all tore us apart.....you assume I speak from an American point of view because my name says newyorkee.....I am very much Spaniard and half of all I am is this part of my identity......In my own family we lost loved ones to the worst of men in the worst of ways......I hate war.....I won't hide that......but don't think for a second that a civil, sensitive person, can in any way try and hurt people based on an "agenda".....I am not sick and maladjusted.....I live a perfectly normal life....I am not bipolar or schizophrenic....I am a normal person living a modest life.....

I speak of my friends that were normal too and came back different....they didn't form part of elite units.....they didn't get special treatment for doing their job well.....they were as good as they could be...the best they could be....but they came back to very dull, meaningless lives.....stock boys, waiters, they didn't get much for their sacrifice.....meaningless wars......that makes things harder.....makes it allot darker a world for them....

I just want to say that for some one that dislikes something written with the hopes of a creative interpretation.....you are taking quite literally my writing style and commenting in too many ways your dislike of it....just ignore it.....look at how many times you try and express your dislike of this......yet you can't let it go and have to attack the validity of my point of view.....just go......you have ruined the conversation I wanted to offer someone that didn't see it like you....maybe they would have just wanted to speak their mind on the subject and move on...maybe they would have wanted just an ear to listen about this.....who knows.....but any chance of that is ruined when people like you.....intolerant people....try and impose your "superior" understanding.......

who says NO SOLDIERS feel like this .you don't ,fine .leave .someone else might. Instead you have to just KNOW this is not correct, valid, sincere. Whatever .(agenda) really. grow up .I am not as deluded as you to think anything we post here has more than passing value to anyone or anything .get real MR.hollywood...(as I call you)

this is where I can speak my mind .I made not argument...stated no claim to anything.....I just wrote something .yet you have to try and silence it.....why? you don't agree......you remind me of the friends i lost not to war in that they died....just that they ended up screaming at me at some point.....If you don't like America...THEN LEAVE!!! Like when bush was on his way to Iraq......when I suggested 911 was an auto attack....I was humiliated by people I loved. because they couldn't disagree.....it would mean all they lost to this way of life was lost for nothing......it was easier to deal with if it was all really for freedom....if it really was for democracy....if it was for any damn word you could name. I think of the wars MY COUNTRY is in....and I look to what it has done

SO what if in your eastern European country you have become desensitized by all the war you have seen....91 huh......long time to still understand what a person who has less than a year of actual combat might feel....MAYBE, you have grown too professional a soldier to understand what we.....normal people might feel because of war....we aren't maladjusted...we aren't schizophrenic....we try and stay normal.....it is WHO WE ARE.....not what an army or a war made us....but rather what and who we were before we go in.....It's harder to try and live by who you are after you have become some one new.you are a professional soldier....anything after that is still down that road.someone trying to return to being teacher...or a mechanic.....might not just revolve back into his life without addressing the things he saw one set of human beings do to another.....it's not all one road for him.....it's harder....he has to choose who he will be.....that warrior....or who he was before.....for some it's harder.IMO.I am not military...I don't pretend I am.....I have close people who are....I do know them....I have spoken to people who have done in ways more sinister and more twisted, things to their own countrymen....that conventional war should never be. no expert. just me

reply to post by DerepentLEstranger


solfiers are the greatest victims of war

reply to post by Jace26


no I left them out so as to rid a creative outlet of logic and fact......I want to go deeper so as to understand....not higher so as to praise

reply to post by Neocrusader



you are correct.,...this does not belong here...I like it when I can connect to people....but I don't like praise as it takes away from the experience of the connection.....no one here that is a soldier has told me where I am wrong....tell me your story....make me understand...that is the purpose of this....I want to understand something that has in me taken a deep meaning....It resonates with me in ways I can only scrape the surface of....

but your argument is one of offence...you take offence.....to my ignorance of your story or to the story itself....how would I get to where I took this....what is the valid way.....I did it as sincerely as possible.....I did it thinking of their pain....not their glory.....that is what moved me....not the praise they deserve....but the pain they have because of their story....their life....

I am truly sorry if it offends as obviously insulting some one doesn't need to be this complicated and that was not my intention......but I didn't .....you just chose to see it that way......I guess it's not for you....but please let me speak my mind without words of silence and in a way censorship....your approval doesn't negate or confirm my writings validity....it simply is what my heart made me do......I truly felt this as I wrote it the same way I felt it as it was planted in me by those sad eyes that revealed it to me.....I can't not write it......

thats why I came back...I was going to become a lurker again....I got mad.....I am human and I am sorry for that....but I do believe in all I do....I choose to be here and I choose to express myself....not for praise saying how nice my poetry is....but to connect to something I feel but don't understand.....I need the world for that.....I want to grow....this is the step before me....I do not hesitate to take it.....with or without you....

but you tell me....its your story you say......

reply to post by g146541


proof of technicality is not an argument except for greater technicality....technically I am a New Yorker first and an American second....yet if you feel so strongly to take issue with me ....I suggest you go over this entire site and "correct" every instance of this terminology when referring to North Americans.....or People of the nation of the United states of America.....I just don't care....call me lazy....I say your just looking to be a jerk....IMO

reply to post by Neocrusader


sorry my skill in interpretive writing is lacking...I´ll try harder next time.....If I bother at all.....as this subject has not made me grow....but rather has brought out in me the worst of my humanity....I just don't like the way you guys think.......I really don't like it at all.....

I take comfort only in the fact I am not alone in this......

reply to post by ignorant_ape


no,....it's a rant that I felt at the time and being that its source is a FEELING it has no place in logical A-B-C thought....I imagine you have at least an inkling of creative thought in you so as to see that....but hey if you want to technical I was pissed and I didn't hide it...I am not ashamed.....it's what I felt.....it was valid enough to me to put it....and I would again if that is what I felt....it was written for no one but myself and those that might feel as I did at any given moment....if you felt that way you would understand it....since you don't....move on....not for you buddy