CAUTION READER: if you are intent on having a day full of "good tidings of great joy", i suggest that you may not want to continue reading this post.


i am not a christmas hater. in fact, in recent years i have made a radical re-assessment of my level of enjoyment of holiday festivities. the basis of my reassessment has been, in short, to try to quantify how much my activities during the holidays (thanksgiving thru new-year) aligns with my developmental goals.

this, obviously, is a very personal measure. i will explain my method and its use.

__________


in order to measure something, you must first define a standard of measurement. for me, it has become necessary (this year and last) to separate myself entirely from the holiday trappings in order to obtain a necessary level of objectivity. when you release yourself from the obligation of participation in the holiday social arena, you may then use the internal physiological and behavioral responses to your lack of participation, both of yourself AND OTHERS, as the standard. some common occurrences are anger, and the guilt-trip.


make no mistake: you are here trying to identify just how much you allow your personal integrity to become sacrificed at the alter of social obligation. this is a measure of your personhood.


i can hear your arguments about the value of sacrifice....and to a degree, i agree with you. however, you must first love yourself before you can love others (or perhaps both at once). if you are "loving others" while at the same time pushing your own identity into the mud, you have succeeded only in bringing both parties into submission of the other. therefore, i would like to coin a new phrase: "self-FULL sacrifice". the meaning of this new term is actually the same as the intended meaning of "self-LESS sacrifice". however, in order to resolve the two conflicting terms, you must come to define an equality between "other" and "self".


but that is just so much philosophy....what does it mean???

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last night i attended a family christmas eve dinner. it was probably the same dinner that you, yourself, also attended last night.

when i had had my fill of food, i commented aloud that i might like to finish my plate, but that i was just too full (darnit, this stuff is so delicious!). my overweight auntie (in a room full of extremely overweight people) responded with the following: "well, christmas seems like a good excuse to me."

?!?!?!

my response to that was a real show-stopper: "you do not need an excuse. you may do as you please. no rationalization is necessary."


you see, people LOVE to find reasons to justify their self-destructive (ANTI-developmental) behaviors. at their core, people really hate themselves a lot. and in a society filled with increasing incidence of individual self-loathing, christmas has become the #1 excuse of ALL TIME to perform a sacrifice of the self at the pleasure of the group.


christmas, in other words, has become a cult.

--pretending that you can afford all of those PRESENTS!!!! because santa is AWESOME and you DESERVE it!
--....wait a second. santa? you're not still lying to your children are you?
--were you sure to look your best for the gift exchange? well, of course, there will be pictures taken!
--etc.

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dont believe me? just try it. for the remainder of the afternoon and evening i urge you to do the following simple task: ask yourself how much are YOU really getting out of this, in terms of nourishment for your own soul?

is there any part of this that you would prefer to not be doing?
then, why are you doing it?
you do not need an excuse. you may do as you please.
in fact, you MUST do as you please.


if you leave your christmas festivities today feeling like you just spent the day on-the-job, you deserve to spend some time pondering that.

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i have written this thread because, if what you're seeing in your life is even remotely like what i am seeing in my life, the state of the human soul is deplorable. and yet, everyone around me presents the appearance of the JOY-JOY-JOYfulness that they certainly must be experiencing.


interacting with hypnotized robots is tiring.


i hope that you, dear reader, are a fully actualized person filling your day with activities which are enriching for both you and those around you.


but, somehow, i doubt that is the case....


best....



p.s. my responses to this thread will be very limited. thanks.

As far as I'm concerned, you can only do as you please so long as it does not violate another being's free will. Beyond that, I pretty much agree mostly. People are very sensitive about Christmas and immediately shut down any criticism of it. However, you should be careful about calling others "hypnotized robots." You might look back 5 years ago today and view your past self as such, but who's to say that you won't be doing the same 5 years from now?

I actually agree with a lot of what you say OP.

I don't celebrate at all actually because it doesn't mean anything. Like you said it is almost an indoctrinated obligation conditioned into us by the corporate media in order to make us feel like we have to go blow tons of cash and spoil everyone.

Pointless.

I choose to enjoy every day of my life equally, and to treat people the same at all times of the year.

And I am no fan of wasting money supporting corporations I do not agree with that practice very questionable policies.

I won't bother trying to convince anyone else, it's just something you have to come to within yourself and let go of before you will ever be able to free yourselves from this contradictory existence.

It's a day.

Nothing hypnotic about it, other than you "must spend."

I didn't so that must make me free and clear.

I chose to do what I wanted today.

I slept til noon, had coffee and read online.

I then chose to go to Denny's and have some fajitas while chatting with my honey oveseas. I was happy they had free wifi!!

I had a few people get all pissy cause I wasn't celebrating Christmas but those who know me know that I don't celebrate it.

I dont need a holiday to show loved ones how I feel and I dont need a holiday to tell me to buy things. I spent 0 on Christmas this year and it was by choice.

I enjoyed my day all by myself....


I use to do the festivities of Christmas but it was always something I dreaded and wanted to get out of then I just said screw it nobody is gonna tell me I have to do anything. It was a nice feeling!