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Thanks to those who replied so far!
Originally posted by Gseven
reply to post by Before2017Victor
Friend, you just stated everything I feel. Thank you!
I too, struggle with wanting to dig into something, but then holding all this information and then saying, "what now?" There's nothing next. Where's the end? Who's holding up the pinata? It's so damn confusing, it can't possibly be true, but then things come out, and suddenly, I feel like it MUST be true. If it's true, I have no recourse. Who am I against all these huge, faceless entities? I'm a single ant to the dinosaur. Then what??
I just want to know why the hell I'm here, because I'm not enjoying this life much. I go up and down, between saying all the right things, but not feeling them, or feeling all the right things and not saying them. People talk so much about what they know...enlightenment, "in the moment", and all this good-feeling stuff, but to be honest, I've never felt one single iota of it. I've tried. Believe me, I've tried. I'm starting to feel like everyone is full of crap, and they're all just pretending not to be to keep from feeling what I feel. The one time I DID feel some strange and amazing things, it was not the result of some meditation....it was the result of a diet change, a parasite purge, and something else that was alchemically related. (I've been interested in alchemy for many years now as well, but even that is full of a bunch egomaniacs, looking to make a buck. It's hard to find truth in that as well.)
Just once, I want something real. Give me something real that I can believe in that helps me understand what all this is about. If there are "angels" out there and God can see this, I'm tired of the confusion...hell, I'm just tired. Help me out, please.
Originally posted by NowanKenubi
“Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing had happened.” – Winston Churchill
We all want to unknow at some point. Be strong, and don't give in to paranoia.