Things women should know about men

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posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 06:49 AM
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Great post. Basically... so true


9 words women use




posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 06:53 AM
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reply to post by tinker9917
 


Many thanks, that would explain why I don't know what it is. I hate "decorative" cloths, period.

And yes I am a woman.

Namasté



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 07:09 AM
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reply to post by tinker9917
 


Yikes

* runs away and hides from women like that *

Namasté



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 07:26 AM
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LOL I love this! Especially the long hair thing. My husbands theory: The older a woman gets, the shorter her hair gets. WHY?

Needless to say, I have longer hair. Small price to pay, in my book, to keep him happy!



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 07:42 AM
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That is hilarious, and true.



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 08:13 AM
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I read those, and it was like I wrote them from my husbands perspective! That was great! Those are pretty much right on and I must say I generally follow them.

My husband also loves the long hair and boobs. I have to say that some of my past relationships have gone sour just after getting a hair cut. Needless to say it's down to my bum and I am married now,


Expecting too much from a man is always a disaster, finding out early how they are and living with it will save a person a lot of heart ache in the long run. My husband's work/hobby is something I struggle with because it keeps him away from home a lot but I have to remind myself that he was doing it before I ever came around, and asking him to stop would not be good for the relationship.
Anyway, great post!



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 08:38 AM
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reply to post by KnightwhosaysNi
 



1 - Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.


[color=mediumorchid]But some of us just don't look good with long hair.



1 - You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.


[color=dodgerblue]Not all us of have a sick shoe obsession. I only have four or five pairs.



1 - Crying is blackmail.


[color=deeppink]It's not if you made us do it.



1 - Check your oil. Please. The red light is not supposed to come on. It is not a reminder light. It is a $5000 IDIOT Light.


[color=mediumorchid]This is your job. I don't know where it is on my new (to me) car. It's also your job to change the headlights. So don't yell at me next time I get pulled over for having only one and it just happens that my license is expired by one day and I get a ticket. Just sayin'...


1 - What the hell is a doily?


[color=deepskyblue]I have no idea.



edit on 22-12-2011 by daryllyn because: (no reason given)



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 08:43 AM
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Originally posted by unworldly
I have always hated ridiculous joke lists, such as this one, that supposedly speak for all men. I don't find them amusing and funny; I find them offensive. No man speaks for all men.


I think I can speak for most women when I say...

#1 - We prefer men who are "worldly" enough to know that you shouldn't take everything too seriously, is capable of a sense of humor, and can laugh at themselves while not being easily offended.



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 09:13 AM
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Originally posted by concerned24
I find this funny, however i can say i am glad to be a lesbian. I like long hair as well but i myself have that sinead/ Demi moore look. But i pull it off because my head is nice and round LOL. You know i would imagine for men and even myself that boobs have more of a significance then hair does..just saying lol.


surprisingly, most men are initially attracted to a woman's hair before any other physical feature



longggg hair



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 09:17 AM
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1 - Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.


[color=mediumorchid]But some of us just don't look good with long hair.

unattractive



1 - You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.


[color=dodgerblue]Not all us of have a sick shoe obsession. I only have four or five pairs.

above average, regardless.



1 - Crying is blackmail.


[color=deeppink]It's not if you made us do it.

ESPECIALLY, if we made you do it.




1 - Check your oil. Please. The red light is not supposed to come on. It is not a reminder light. It is a $5000 IDIOT Light.


[color=mediumorchid]This is your job. I don't know where it is on my new (to me) car. It's also your job to change the headlights. So don't yell at me next time I get pulled over for having only one and it just happens that my license is expired by one day and I get a ticket. Just sayin'...


this is YOUR CAR.



1 - What the hell is a doily?


[color=deepskyblue]I have no idea.

HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF GOOGLE?



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 09:26 AM
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well, I joined ATS specifically to post to this thread. LOL- Nothing better to do today I guess.

It's about the long hair thing...Men- if you had to take care of it, you would never wish it on us. It is a lot of work required into a sometime already busy, busy day.

My other thought is that if you like your woman to have long hair, how's about YOU actually shaving every day, or wearing things when we go out that make us go, "wow", ----takes work for all that doesnt it? See what I mean?



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 09:29 AM
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Originally posted by KnightwhosaysNi
Inspired by another thread here, I've decided to compile a comprehensive list of things women should know about men. Disclaimer: I did not come up with these. I also don't agree with all of them. Note: they are all labeled #1 on purpose!

1 - If you think you are fat, you probably are. Do not ask us, we refuse to answer. well, then lie to us, cause we prob need your assurance that YOU don't think we are.

1 - Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.How about YOU learn to do the same? If you put it up, put it back down!

1 - Do not cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair, and by then, you are stuck with her.

1 - Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can find the perfect present yet again!

1 - If you ask a question you don't want an answer to; expect an answer you do not want to hear.

1 - Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1 - Do not ask us what we are thinking unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as naval lint, the shotgun formation, and monster trucks.

1 - Sunday = Sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1 - Shopping is not a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1 - When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1 - You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.

1 - Crying is blackmail.

1 - Your ex-boyfriend is an idiot.

1 - Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Please just come out and say it!

1 - No, we do not know what day it is. We never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar. Reminds us frequently beforehand.

1 - Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we`d be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

1 - Yes and No are both perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1 - Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1 - A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1 - Foreign films are best left to foreigners.

1 - Check your oil. Please. The red light is not supposed to come on. It is not a reminder light. It is a $5000 IDIOT Light.

1 - Do not fake it. We would rather be ineffective than deceived.

1 - Anything said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1 - If you won't dress like Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1 - If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of those ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1 - Let us ogle. We are going to look anyways; it's genetic.

1 - Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.

1 - You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done - not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1 - Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1 - Christopher Columbus didn't need directions, and neither do we.

1 - Women wearing Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at. More women should wear Wonderbras and low-cut blouses. We like staring at boobs.

1 - The relationship is never going to be like it was in the first two months we were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends - like THEIR relationship is SO MUCH better.

1 - All men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit, We have no idea what mauve is.

1 - If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1 - If it is OUR house, I do not understand why MY stuff gets thrown in the closet, attic, basement or worse, the garbage.

1 - We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1 - If we ask what is wrong and you say *nothing*, we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.

1 - What the hell is a doily?
edit on 21-12-2011 by KnightwhosaysNi because: typo - where ware were and wear oi!



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 09:34 AM
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reply to post by Gwampo
 

[color=dodgerblue]You really butchered the bbcode there... My goodness.




ESPECIALLY, if we made you do it.


[color=mediumorchid]If you intentionally said something to hurt our feelings, it's not blackmail if we cry. It means that you were being a jerk.



unattractive


[color=dodgerblue]I could care less if you don't find my hair attractive. I don't like the way I look with long hair. I will probably never have long again. And I am completely okay with that.



this is YOUR CAR.


[color=deepskyblue]No. It's his car, we just refer to it as my car because I am the one that drives it.




HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF GOOGLE?


[color=mediumorchid]I was being sarcastic.
edit on 22-12-2011 by daryllyn because: (no reason given)



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 10:19 AM
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Originally posted by KnightwhosaysNi



1 - Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.


2 - We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

editby]edit on 21-12-2011 by KnightwhosaysNi because: typo - where ware were and wear oi!


#1....
Why DO they do that?

#2.... A very timely reminder.....Thank you. There are good reasons for that sometimes though.


Great list man, thank you.





posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 10:25 AM
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Originally posted by Deetermined

Originally posted by unworldly
I have always hated ridiculous joke lists, such as this one, that supposedly speak for all men. I don't find them amusing and funny; I find them offensive. No man speaks for all men.


I think I can speak for most women when I say...

#1 - We prefer men who are "worldly" enough to know that you shouldn't take everything too seriously, is capable of a sense of humor, and can laugh at themselves while not being easily offended.


Women i feel joke too much sometimes then men (me) cant tell the difference then we get yelled at when we take the wrong thing serious or wrong thing jokingly.



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 10:31 AM
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reply to post by KnightwhosaysNi
 

in jugoslavia or serbia we do not have the women problem. is stupid american trait. either you are man or not. if you make the embarass of yourself you must make yourself honor again. either join republika srbija as vojnik soljier or make the many kill of turk and croatian..... or albo. but the albo is hard to kill. they are slippery and hide in holes like rat.. but i digress

when i met my wife i am 9 years. i force her to bring herself to my home.. i am orphan so i live in forest in shadow of carpathian mountains. is romantik... i make love to her and she grew child from my seed. she 12 year old at time.
i now 14 year old and we make the happily marriage of orthodox christianity. my child will fight for serbia... remember that next time you come here american... we will get you



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 11:17 AM
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Short haired women are easier to lay, in my experience.
edit on 22-12-2011 by Fitch303 because: (no reason given)



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 11:21 AM
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reply to post by Nana2
 

I never saw it that way before...but I will always appreciate long hair (it hypnotizes me)
edit on 22-12-2011 by Luckyxfactor because: (no reason given)



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 12:02 PM
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Well, I've started a hair war, and just on time for the holidays too! To those who are offended or disagree about the list: lighten up. If you don't approve of the humor intended, then move along and find content that you do approve of. Nobody can cater to everyone, and if this doesn't cater to your tastes, then oh well.


Originally posted by Nana2
well, I joined ATS specifically to post to this thread. LOL- Nothing better to do today I guess.

It's about the long hair thing...Men- if you had to take care of it, you would never wish it on us. It is a lot of work required into a sometime already busy, busy day.

My other thought is that if you like your woman to have long hair, how's about YOU actually shaving every day, or wearing things when we go out that make us go, "wow", ----takes work for all that doesnt it? See what I mean?


I resent that statement! I HAVE had long hair, and on more than one occasion. I know how much time is required to maintain it. We do appreciate the effort you ladies take on your appearance. Also, I do like short hair as well. Even Emma Watson and her REALLY short hair. I'm not bothered by it as some are. Oh, and, welcome officially to ATS! Do enjoy your time here!


Originally posted by daryllyn
But some of us just don't look good with long hair.


I concur. And there are some great short hair styles as well!

And for the record, since it must be said: with the exception of one or two points, I do not, personally, subscribe the this list. That, and this list is probably dated a bit. And yes, I do put the seat down when I'm done with it.



Originally posted by thatonedude
... remember that next time you come here american...


I resent that statement too! I am not American!



posted on Dec, 22 2011 @ 12:13 PM
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Originally posted by Nana2
well, I joined ATS specifically to post to this thread. LOL- Nothing better to do today I guess.

It's about the long hair thing...Men- if you had to take care of it, you would never wish it on us. It is a lot of work required into a sometime already busy, busy day.

My other thought is that if you like your woman to have long hair, how's about YOU actually shaving every day, or wearing things when we go out that make us go, "wow", ----takes work for all that doesnt it? See what I mean?


this is true as my gf has long hair and she complains about the maintenance required for its upkeep





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