Is it possible to fall in love on the Internet?

Words are very powerful!



(Picture above from a recent post by ATS member Rustami).



Can the words somebody writes alone make you fall in love?

I think its possible. But dangerous. Because you don't know the whole person. You only know what they write. Even if they are not deceiving you intentionally, they will be presenting themselves in a better light.

Can you trust the reality behind the words?

Or, is love from words the purest love? Because it is uncorrupted with physical matters?

What do you think?

(No I'm not in love with anyone on ats lol...inb4...)

check out all the "phelia's"

people fall in love with/via the wierdest things and ways.

so my answer is yes. outside influences help you steer yourself into arriving at certain emotional states...love, of course, being one of them.

I have been with the same guy for 13 years and we meet via good ole AOL IM...lol 4 kids later.

I spent 2 years talking to a girl on irc and we did indeed "fall in love". Some days we would talk for 10-12 hours. I'm in Europe and restricted. She lives in the US and likewise.... ain't life a beach?

ETA Only text, via internet. No photo's, no webcam, no voice. I was completely smitten with her and her appearance mattered nothing for I had seen her heart in all its glory! She was also 10 years younger which didn't exactly fill me with confidence but that is possibly more my self-insecurity than anything else. I want a Vegas/Elvis wedding.

reply to post by outandopen


Wow! So cool!

Would you say you fell in love over the internet or later in real life?

reply to post by Partygirl


I met my wife on MySpace haha!
2nd

Ever hear of Cyrano de Bergerac? Tha being said, wiping vomit from the chin of a real person is a far cry from sweet nothings over the net. Translation: talk is cheap.

reply to post by jcord


I haven't heard of that person but talk is not cheap. My wireless internet costs me around 200 dollars a month.

(oh after thought...just wanted to clarify, I am not chatting for romance stuff) That is what it costs me just to entertain myself.

maybe that is cheap though? I don't like spending money so perhaps 200 dollars a month is not that expensive?
and what about phone bills or smsing etc. That adds up too.

I do not have any advice on this issue. There are some bad stories and then there are some good ones so...

try it and find out? or don't try it and find out?



(that is an inconclusive answer, I do apologise!)

reply to post by jcord

I know Cyrano. He's like me, he has a large nose! What does Cyrano have to do with vomit though? It has been a while since I watched the movie but Gerard Depardieu was good in it.

My view on love is something I rarely talk about, just because I want to avoid arguing with the majority of people, because the majority will probably disagree with me. From a psychological standpoint, what most people call love is simply a dropping of the ego-boundaries.

The "feeling" of falling in love, and I'm sure everyone knows this feeling, is NOT really love. It is this removal of your ego-boundaries. When that feeling goes away, and it almost always does, that is your ego-boundary snapping back into place. That isn't love, it is a chemical reaction in the brain caused by personal desires.

TRUE love doesn't involve removing your ego-boundary. True love is EXPANDING your ego-boundary to include this other person. So basically, true love is present between two people when they still are attracted, care, etc with one another, AFTER the perceived "feeling" of love has dissipated.

Most people think that because that feeling is gone, they aren't in love anymore, and that just is not the case. This isn't just some theory I put together overnight, but rather an idea that has been developed, not by me, but by actual psychiatrists and mental health professionals.

As I said, most people won't agree, but it is what I not only believe to be the truth, but what I have experienced as truth as well. Take it for what you will.

Anyway, about what your question...I think two people can have that "feeling" over the internet, which just proves that it is chemical, so I do not think it is truly possible to fall in real love online.

reply to post by Partygirl


I don't know about love, but serious Crushes are possible.

I'm crushing so hard on one ATS member that it feels like one of those impossible fourth-grade crushes...the kind that hurt you in the pit of the stomach...meanwhile she has no idea I exist...and actually I have no idea what she looks like.

The intra-tubes are weird, weird stuff.

In my opinion, NO!

You can find a connection and have feelings for that person due to the connection, but love comes with knowing someone all-round. I feel in order to love someone you must know their true colors and actually experience social connection on a up-close personal level. At least that applies for love in an intimate relationship kinda way. Feelings and love are two different things, it's time for people nowadays to realize this. But I doubt anyone will ever realize it, that is why relationships die out quickly... All feelings, no love. Until you know what love is, your helpless.

Originally posted by FailedProphet
reply to post by Partygirl

 

I'm crushing so hard on one ATS member that it feels like one of those impossible fourth-grade crushes...the kind that hurt you in the pit of the stomach...meanwhile she has no idea I exist...and actually I have no idea what she looks like.

thanks for the laugh out loud.

I did feel sorry for you when I read that...

I had a 'relationship' with a woman in Holland via the interwebbies. we talked each other through the sudden death of her mother and my becoming estranged from my family.

Neither of us would have dealt half as well if the other hadn't of been there as a 'safe' place to find refuge from the world.

So yes, i think love is possible.

It sure hurt when it ended i know that much. and there is the downside. Physical limitations eventually come into play.

reply to post by Thurisaz


It hurts. It hurrrrrrts!

I'm in love with some pixels !!

I think it is possible.

I fell in love with a guy over the Internet. We talked for about a year and a half, almost every single day, for hours on end. He was even the first to talk about starting to have feelings.

When we finally got around to talking about where we lived, we wound up finding out that we lived within about an hour and a half drive of one another.

So we met and started dating and everything was going fine for about six months. Then one day I went over to his apartment to surprise him. He'd given me a key, so I went on in. Long story short, I caught him cheating.

And so that night I sacrificed a goat to Thor that he might be smote from the Earth.

He wasn't smote from the Earth or anything dramatic like that, but he did have quite a bit of financial troubles after that.


(But, in all seriousness, yes it's possible)

Since I now consider "in love" to be something that occurs within a persons own mind, and something of a slight insanity, then yes. A person could fall in love in any given situation, unfortunately.

reply to post by Partygirl


Of course!

My Dad signed up to one of those dating websites and found his new partner.

He now lives in Calgary with her.

Originally posted by notquiteright
Since I now consider "in love" to be something that occurs within a persons own mind, and something of a slight insanity, then yes. A person could fall in love in any given situation, unfortunately.

That's so sad....

Originally posted by Partygirl

Originally posted by notquiteright
Since I now consider "in love" to be something that occurs within a persons own mind, and something of a slight insanity, then yes. A person could fall in love in any given situation, unfortunately.

That's so sad....

Actually, it's not, really. It's kind of liberating.