Cats are Alien Camcorders!

I wake up everyday for the last 14 years with my black cat sitting on my chest staring at me and waiting for me to get up and FEED him!! LOL

Seriously though, when I was pregnant with my son, my cat would lay across my belly and purrrrrrrr until my baby kicked! Everyday, all the time!! I always thought that was WEIRD!!

reply to post by wiltondeportes


My cat shoots laser beams from her arse! This must mean mine is a different species from yours. To which i logically conclude there is more than one species from different planets visiting Earth!!! Maybe the Universe is teaming with feline like life?

my cat snores.. is that part of the alien thing too? or has my cat been compromised? she sux so I'd really like to send her back ..

reply to post by jimnuggits


Cats do not always land on their feet, that is a myth.

As far as them being alien camcorders, the "alien overlords" are going to get a lot of footage of each of my cats butts since they are always sniffing each other.

The Egyptians were the first to domesticate the cat so of course there is no mention of them before that.

They domesticated them in order to protect stores of food from vermin. They eventually began to worship them or at least greatly revere them.

Thanks for the early morning laugh, I seriously hope you don't honestly believe your post.

Seriously the front page?

Makes me want to keep my ats membership anonymous for fear of embarrassment.
Which is not good of course.
"Yea come to Ats where we deny ignorance". Isn't it a bit ignorant that this made front page no?
I donno maybe it's just me who's bitter.

Link to Funny Cat Vids

www.abovetopsecret.com...

No I am bitter as well...

I was gonna go on a big long rant about how this thread getting so many S&F encourages bad threads, but everyone wants to post their BLEEPing cat pictures....

There is no evidence, it is an extreamly weak hypothesis when taking actual facts into account.

And also no one posted... no pictures=not happening my favorite ats post

*edit... I have to leave ATS for awhile..this thread is over 60 flag... This is THE WORST THREAD OF THE YEAR.
It frustrates me to no end. You know I think I hate cats now because of this thread....and it has nothing to do with the OP

I always knew cats were superior beings, looking down on us lowly primates with contempt.

Hence, why my home and yard are filled with them. Cats rule.

reply to post by KingAtlas

but everyone wants to post their BLEEPing cat pictures

It's ridiculous. I like cats also, but for this thread to be in the front page is what im complaining about.

To each their own but this is pathetic.

Um

Hey dude, my pickle is loyal, he sends disinfo to them there aliens

Originally posted by megabytz
reply to post by jimnuggits

 

Cats do not always land on their feet, that is a myth.

What do u mean?
I'm deadly sure that they will always land on their feet since one of my childhood research was to throw cats from a high place and see which ones didn't made it. The result was always the same. They would end up landing on their feets.

I cannot believe how many people agree with the OP's premise. Surely this thread is a joke? If not, then you all should be embarrassed, tsk! tsk
_______________________________

I thought we stopped demonizing cats back in the middle ages?

Originally posted by jimnuggits
That's right, brothers and sisters, I am here on ATS to steer you to the awful truth about our feline 'friends.' They are biological transmitters working as spies for our Alien Overlords. Take these facts into account and reach your own conclusion... Beware, what you are about to read will forever change the way you see these minions of our extraterrestrial oppressors.

1. There is no documentation before Ancient Egypt that mentions the existence of Cats, and IN Ancient Egypt, they are worshipped as Gifts from The Gods.

2. Science is baffled by a cat's purr, and cannot determine how the sound is produced. (Feedback, much?)

3. If you hold a cat's ears back and describe what you see, it is a perfect match to the classic 'Grey'. Almond shaped eyes, small mouth, small nose.

Freaked out yet? How about these:

4. A cat can see exponentially better than you. Making it appear that it must be more advanced evolutionarily speaking. How?

5. Ever watch a cat wake from a deep sleep and run out of the room in an instant? Transmissions from the mothership coming in, and must be alone.

6. All things that come out of cats are totally unnatural. (Not of this earth.)

Still not convinced? I got a few more for the more skeptical among you:

7. Cats survive situations that any Earthbound animal would surely perish in. How can a cat fall out of a four story building backwards, and land on its feet? (Anti gravity properties)

8. If you die, your cats will eat you. Not really a link between cats and Aliens, but still pretty creepy.

9. Ever wake up and your cat was sitting on your chest, staring at you? Taking your will not to do their bidding and dreaming of the day their Alien handlers once again fit you for your yolk and chains.

You have been warned, intrepid ATS'ers...

Well im f****d my moms got 4 cats and they all look evil like im there slave

This thread got me through the last half our of my job. Greastest piece of comedy I have seen anywhere in a long time. Great job ATS! Its kinda of sad that this is joke is reality for some people though.


Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

Originally posted by LvSLoLo

Originally posted by jimnuggits
That's right, brothers and sisters, I am here on ATS to steer you to the awful truth about our feline 'friends.' They are biological transmitters working as spies for our Alien Overlords. Take these facts into account and reach your own conclusion... Beware, what you are about to read will forever change the way you see these minions of our extraterrestrial oppressors.

1. There is no documentation before Ancient Egypt that mentions the existence of Cats, and IN Ancient Egypt, they are worshipped as Gifts from The Gods.

2. Science is baffled by a cat's purr, and cannot determine how the sound is produced. (Feedback, much?)

3. If you hold a cat's ears back and describe what you see, it is a perfect match to the classic 'Grey'. Almond shaped eyes, small mouth, small nose.

Freaked out yet? How about these:

4. A cat can see exponentially better than you. Making it appear that it must be more advanced evolutionarily speaking. How?

5. Ever watch a cat wake from a deep sleep and run out of the room in an instant? Transmissions from the mothership coming in, and must be alone.

6. All things that come out of cats are totally unnatural. (Not of this earth.)

Still not convinced? I got a few more for the more skeptical among you:

7. Cats survive situations that any Earthbound animal would surely perish in. How can a cat fall out of a four story building backwards, and land on its feet? (Anti gravity properties)

8. If you die, your cats will eat you. Not really a link between cats and Aliens, but still pretty creepy.

9. Ever wake up and your cat was sitting on your chest, staring at you? Taking your will not to do their bidding and dreaming of the day their Alien handlers once again fit you for your yolk and chains.

You have been warned, intrepid ATS'ers...

Well im f****d my moms got 4 cats and they all look evil like im there slave

Not a slave!!! "Staff",

Dog's have owners ,cats have staff

Originally posted by blocula
I cannot believe how many people agree with the OP's premise. Surely this thread is a joke? If not, then you all should be embarrassed, tsk! tsk
_______________________________

I thought we stopped demonizing cats back in the middle ages?

Sense of Humour Fail..:facepalm:

I love this thread!

I can relate to it because I've always had weird experiences with cats.
Like they follow me around even if I dont know them, I can call them and talk to them telepathically, and there's a grey coloured one that comes to my window when I'm feeling down.

I used to have an orange one that was like my best friend but when my GF at the time took off she took him and I have no idea where he is now.

Do not doubt the seriousness of the Catspiracy.

They are everywhere.

Thank you ATS for embracing this shocking theory, which, we all know, is Iron Clad and totally unassailable.

Unless you are an agent of the coming CATastrophe....

Maybe humans are actually alien created cyborgs and our eyes are motion picture transmitters and all our images and thoughts are sent back to another planet in another galaxy and when we think the wrong thoughts,see the wrong things,our alien overlords send an invisible lasar beam that hits us and we have a stroke or heart attack...Could be?

Spontaneous Human Combustion?...Invisible creatures that live in the sun and they ocasionally attack unsuspecting earthlings and burn them alive...Could be?

My toaster has been acting really weird lately...Its an alien drone from jupiter...I knew it!