I am really confused. I have had things like dreams and visions that painted tragedy here or there, that date or another, and I usually see it as
something curious- like wouldn't that be wierd if it turned out to really happen? -Without my emotions getting involved at all, because I guess I
just don't believe it. Couldn't if I tried.
But a dream I had a while ago, concerning a big earthquake or eruption happening (and causing a tsunami) seems to be "getting to me" and I find it
very troubling! In my dream I saw on a map where it happened- in the middle fo the meditteranean, between Mallorca and Sardinia. It caused a big
tsunami which hit the coast of France.
As usual, I've mostly been thinking hm, that would be interesting if it really happened!
A week ago my husband surprised me with the news that we are going scuba diving Sunday, off the coast of Marseille. I am excited and happy! We will be
spending Saturday night at a luxurious hotel in a nearby beautiful village, and it will be a romantic getaway for us.
But this whole week I have had a building anxiety happening and I can't figure out what was causing it. I mean, like really bad, I am not okay. Yet
my life is almost fairytale perfect right now! I have no problems, no worries, all is very good. So I am observing my inner reactions for clues to
what is weighing so heavily on me.
I noticed that I feel it grow when I consider the diving trip...... and I realize that that stupid dream is probably the source of my anxiety! I
don't feel safe on that coast any more! I went to the beach two weeks ago and didn't feel any discomfort or anxiety at all. But for soem reason I do
I don't believe in the Elenin approach stuff either, I do not believe Elenin exists anymore. But heck, I am realizing that the subconscious just
doesn't seem to put a whole lot of stock in what I believe or what I don't, and reacts to the images it has in memory anyway. That is a rather
troublesome thing to realize- I am just not totally 100% in charge of how my body reacts to the ideas I am exposed to.
-Unless, of course, you guys hear about an earthquake in the Mediterranean this weekend that causes a big tsunami that hits the coast of South
France.....then I guess I'll be that poster that foresaw it and is now dead.
I feel silly, and embarrassed. I am usually a more rational type. Maybe it's hormones or something.