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To Not Be Loved Is Like Hell

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posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 02:55 PM
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Now I don't know what hell would be like but I am assuming that it is much worse than to go through life not being loved. But to go on for years and have the opposite sex not care anything about you, it feels like hell. It feels like you want to cry so much inside but your tears are all dry. It feels like you want to throw up but you are not sick. Every time I see lovers I get jealous now just because I have gone for so many years witnessing ladies not care anything about me. This person is so heart broken, every day by lunch time I have so much pressure in my chest I am about to burst with flame, all because the opposite sex does not care anything about me and has not cared anything about me.
edit on 13-10-2011 by greyer because: (no reason given)




posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:04 PM
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Sometimes Love can be like living in Hell... I know, I'm in Love with someone and it's a nightmare... Love hurts... I say forget Love and persue LUST...



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:05 PM
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reply to post by greyer
 


Amen brother. That is the way we are designed, it is called the survival instinct. If it where not for these feelings, this urge to please and get pleased by the other sex, we would be extinct a long time ago. What you need to do is stop caring so much, really. No woman wants a desperate man, and it shows as soon as you get near them. Get something else to think about, and it will happen, when u least except it.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:07 PM
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women want fame/royality/security to make other women jealous.


Thats all you need , get them one of those and the women will be all over you .


They are shallow just like us men who really care about sex. But we sugar coat with other crap to make it seem not so shallow.


Women and men are simple creatures . You wanna be happpy / exploit there desires and they will eat out of your hands.


Money talks my good man.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:09 PM
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To be quite honest... at times I think it may be better to have never been loved than "loved" by the wrong type of people...

Had I never had any girlfriends (or family)... had I never decided to get married... I would be far better off financially, emotionally, and mentally...

Would you prefer to be "loved" by someone that cheats on you... lies to you... and wreaks havoc on your life to serve their own best interests... or never loved at all...

I personally am at the point I don't know which I would prefer... but I do know the pain of feeling trapped by someone you love that doesn't return it is seemingly far worse than never having been "loved" by them at all...



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:10 PM
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reply to post by greyer
 


It is very emotionally painful to feel the way you do.....and I can relate. There have been times in my past where I did not receive much love....what I finally realized was...that I needed to love myself.....accept myself with all my good points and flaws....forgive myself....be my own best friend. I then got involved in community volunteering ...and made some good friends....who grew to love me..... and I them. At one of those friends parties...I met my current partner.

What I did may work for you....I hope it does.






edit on 13-10-2011 by caladonea because: add more



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:11 PM
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Originally posted by 001ggg100
Sometimes Love can be like living in Hell... I know, I'm in Love with someone and it's a nightmare... Love hurts... I say forget Love and persue LUST...

I think it is a tad worse to have never been loved. That really does something to your self confidence and makes you feel worthless. And i say this as a person that knows what the OP is ranting about.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:11 PM
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not being loved is irrelevant. you must learn to love others and yourself, regardless of if you are loved.
we only find ourselves truly when we are alone and learn to love ourselves,



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:13 PM
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posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:19 PM
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Aye, several years without a cuddle is quite damning for the soul. The only thing I find as bad as "not to be loved" is to be loved, but the person loving you doesn't want to see you. You're right in thinking that doesn't make sense, which is why when it happens it's a real head **** ! Hope you have some luck. Hope we ALL have some luck


I for one understand how it can be hard not to be jealous.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:20 PM
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Originally posted by 001ggg100
Sometimes Love can be like living in Hell... I know, I'm in Love with someone and it's a nightmare... Love hurts... I say forget Love and persue LUST...


Lol its all the same to me, I can transfer lust energy into love. It is harder to love a person I lust, cause lets face it body size has a lot to do with lust, a person in better shape is more likely to attract.


Originally posted by NeoVain
reply to post by greyer
 


Amen brother. That is the way we are designed, it is called the survival instinct. If it where not for these feelings, this urge to please and get pleased by the other sex, we would be extinct a long time ago. No woman wants a desperate man, and it shows as soon as you get near them. Get something else to think about, and it will happen, when u least except it.

That was very refreshing to hear. Again it was my emotional being at fault and not anybody else. There is not anything stopping me but myself in all reality.



What you need to do is stop caring so much, really.

I cannot stop caring too much. This statement reminds me of the lack of care in the world, stirring up my negativity again.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:25 PM
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Originally posted by ValisInUnderland
not being loved is irrelevant. you must learn to love others and yourself, regardless of if you are loved.
we only find ourselves truly when we are alone and learn to love ourselves,


Just noticed the replies thanks, this is good here to because again the root cause is my fault, we are all one. I have been going on for those years loving myself, and I think that the more I love myself the more I understand.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:27 PM
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Will everybody kindly trap their mouths about "having to love yourself for others to love you."


If you have never experienced what the OP says please instead of writing BS don't write at all.

With that said, you have basically described my life from the moment I was born till now.

In college I hang out with a few girls that play hug with the boys but when they turn to me they look at me weirdly.
What I've noticed is they like to be treated like s*** basically.

If that's how it is though, I continue to be alone because I won't change for anybody like that.


It's a cold world for good men. I'm not gonna be hypocritical and tell you that in the end you'll find good friendship or a love that will make this pain go away. I know how much you must hate people telling you that. You would rather have change than comments of pity.



You are not alone.
edit on 13-10-2011 by Jepic because: (no reason given)



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:32 PM
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This song will help you. I've posted it in another forum already but I'll post it again.



edit on 13-10-2011 by Jepic because: (no reason given)



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:37 PM
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I have to ask what you mean by "love". Sex? Intimacy? Those are 2 totally different entities. Caledonia nailed it. You can't even start to "love" another until you love yourself. The childish can put a masturbation joke in here.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:38 PM
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reply to post by greyer
 




It doesn't matter who you are or what you do, there is someone out there for everyone, no question about it. Don't want to sound cliche but I see that as a fact.The key is to not give up, to just keep trying.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:39 PM
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Believe it or not, there are women out there who feel as isolated, lonely and rejected as you do. Your situation is rather like a catch 22.....the more hurt, angry and desperate you become, the more women are put off by it, and the more hurt, angry and rejected you become.

It is necessary to break this cycle within yourself before you can break the lonely cycle of your life. First of all, the intense focus on yourself must be turned outward. This is usually done by volunteer work. You can volunteer at animal shelters as a dog walker or a cat petter (there are TONS of single women who volunteer there). You can volunteer to bring food to the elderly and disabled (Meals on Wheels). Just search the internet for volunteer opportunities in your area.

Once you are focused outward, on others, the better and more attractive parts of who you are will surface, and women will definitely be attracted to that.

Another option is to join clubs, like walking clubs. You show up with a smile and some walking shoes, and go walking along with others.

The emphasis here is to get yourself engaged in a social activity in which the focus is not on dating, but rather helping others or making friends.

As Albert Einstein said, You cannot solve a problem at the same level at which it was created. Break the cycle, get out and care about others, and you'd be surprised at some of the female attention you receive (as long as you are friendly, open and not pushy).



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:41 PM
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Man, I'm sorry to hear you're so distraught. Look to find joy! That's the key. I found joy by meditating, and shutting off the negative thoughts that told me I was no good. Whenever you're feeling down, ask yourself "would things be different if I felt joy right now?". Also, get close to your dad if you're nit already. Men who have poor relationships will their dads will have problems with women. It's all about how you feel inside. When you feel really good, you will be surprised at how your life changes.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:41 PM
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Originally posted by intrepid
I have to ask what you mean by "love". Sex? Intimacy? Those are 2 totally different entities. Caledonia nailed it. You can't even start to "love" another until you love yourself. The childish can put a masturbation joke in here.


Again!?


Please explain to me the freaking concept about having to love yourself to at least have someone that is there when you are alone. This is what I think OP is meaning.

Please by all means.



posted on Oct, 13 2011 @ 03:43 PM
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reply to post by FissionSurplus
 


This is also a very good suggestion that I found helpful. Once again, it's all about changing how you feel and you will he surprised at how much women find that attractive



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