Politics are ruining my marriage

I am a moderate/libertarian. My wife is a Democrat/Kool-Aid drinker.

So obviously when it comes to politics we don't exactly see eye to eye. I do agree with her on some things, and she with me on others.

But this years election has really tarnished the fresh and lively conversation we have always enjoyed in the past.

This isn't a deal breaker... Come February of '05 I am sure we will be over it no matter the outcome. It's just tough for right now. I am considering proposing a no-politics zone at home until the election is over.

So... anyone else have a mixed marriage in turmoil over this election?

you and your wife need your heads testing.....whats more important your marriage that you both obviously love and adore and can have all control over or politics that you will never have any control over in the first place.. sorry but it had to be said....

It sounds like my house. My husband, a Marine of 8 years and I didnt see eye to eye.
We used to get into the craziest, heated battles over what Bush is all about. It took 2 years for me to stop and give up, and he, on his own started seeing things wrong with this bunch. Even though he now agrees with me on most everything, he still, deep inside has reservations. So, I dont say anything to him anymore and he doesnt bring up the subject to me. I roll my eyes when the news is on, of course.
Then I get him his favorite meal ready and discuss the real important things in life like job, kids, etc.
I know im right. and I know he's wrong.

I watch my parents go at it every time I stop by home.

It's a shame that a good debate and discussion is no longer a kind and respectful exchange of ideas that people look forward to. It's become an angry, accusatory, us-vs-them mud slinging event.

I cannot wait for this election to be over and done with.

Well I really don't like either of the Big 2 candidates. So I will ususal scream "BULLSH!T" at the news and commercials for both.

The wifey is a Kerry supporter. Unfourtunately for us, I hate Kerry more then Bush. So I get the stink eye when I holler at Kerry. It's funny though, 'cause after that she will take a pot shot at Bush, and I will agree with her. I guess that's what frustrates her, I can tear her candidate down, but she can't find anything to hit me back with.

I have learned that when she wants to get into a debate, and I know it's going to lead to hurt feelings, I just say I love you. Doesn't always get me out of it, but at least I don't get further into it.

TextMy wife is a Democrat/Kool-Aid drinker.

Better to drink Kool-Aid than alcohol.

And in my case I turned my husband into my choice of political party. Either that or lonely nights at the sofa.

I will have no debates in my home.

Originally posted by marg6043

TextMy wife is a Democrat/Kool-Aid drinker.

Better to drink Kool-Aid than alcohol.

And in my case I turned my husband into my choice of political party. Either that or lonely nights at the sofa.

I will have no debates in my home.

Glad I didn't marry you!
Besides, my wife is my drinking buddy!
We have never had a problem with each others beliefs. Neither one of us is trying to change the others mind. But this particular election has really heated us up. Polarized if you will, we're just on opposite polls. She's anybody but Bush, and I'm anybody but Kerry.

Its no problem in my house I am a Libertarian and my wife is a Nympho-manic

We get along fine

Originally posted by phreak_of_nature
I am a moderate/libertarian. My wife is a Democrat/Kool-Aid drinker.

So obviously when it comes to politics we don't exactly see eye to eye. I do agree with her on some things, and she with me on others.

But this years election has really tarnished the fresh and lively conversation we have always enjoyed in the past.

This isn't a deal breaker... Come February of '05 I am sure we will be over it no matter the outcome. It's just tough for right now. I am considering proposing a no-politics zone at home until the election is over.

So... anyone else have a mixed marriage in turmoil over this election?

Maybe you should listen to your wife and stop supporting your "tough guy."

Originally posted by cstyle226
Maybe you should listen to your wife and stop supporting your "tough guy."

I don't support the tough guy!

I'm not one of those who excepts the lesser of two evils. I vote for the best guy for the job. And I vote third party. I vote for the person who best represents me.

Which is another thing we get into it over. She votes for the lesser, and I vote my conscience.

Originally posted by Amuk
Its no problem in my house I am a Libertarian and my wife is a Nympho-manic

We get along fine

There's no sleeping on the couch over politics here. Why would she want to deny herself also.


[edit on 8/27/2004 by phreak_of_nature]

Normally the elections cause problems in our household ... I'm a Republican my husband is a Democrat. Most of the time we avoid talking politics but this year it's O.K. Thankfully Kerry's flip-flops and his senate voting/attendance record (or should I say lack of?) spoke for itself and I'm happy that my hubby will be voting the 'right' way this year.

[edit on 10/2/2004 by esther]

You are not the only one...

Things are a little odd around my house as well this time. Been with DH for almost 15 years, and this is the first time we have ever had a serious disagreement in all that time. On anything at all.

He agrees with me that Kerry is pondscum (hubby is a Vietnam Vet and has such a strong visceral reaction to even looking at Kerry that he almost vomits and I am not exaggerating there) but at the same time he absolutely cannot vote for Bush. I have never seen him like this before, and as much as he has against Kerry I think he is still voting for him. I am worried about him since he may go off the deep end if he does that

Things are really on edge this time around, and I think that the polarization extends to everyone in general, and not only those in your household. I have not told ANYONE at work who I am voting for since I don't want to find my windshields smashed or tires slashed. Both the pro-Bush and pro-Kerry groups at work are coming unhinged, so it's best to just sit back and keep my mouth shut (and THAT is a first for me, ever!).



Gardenia

Oh yeah,

we would fight many times, while I would be objective to what he would say, he just couldn't. Solution: Don't talk about it unless we can both agree to not get heated...

Originally posted by esther
Wow. I wish I had this problem. Unfortunately, my partner and I agree on something quite fundamental to our happiness:

Politics doesn't have to ruin our marriage. It was easier to pre-emptively outlaw it.

So my thought is this... be thankful that you have a spouse who loves you even though you have a difference of opinion. Some of us don't get the chance to wonder how politics would affect our marriage because we aren't allowed to marry.

Don't sweat the small stuff. Be happy and appreciative of the blessing that having a great spouse truly is!

BRAVO!! And ditto, I might add!

My husband and I almost always vote diffeently in Presidential elections, so we have a "don't ask; don't tell" policy. We each have the right to vote for whomever we please -- and our love is a lot more important than the vote.

Of course, the difference is that we're both peaceable people and we don't make snide comments at the tv when a candidate we dislike is on television. With experience, one learns when to pick a battle.

Originally posted by Amuk
Its no problem in my house I am a Libertarian and my wife is a Nympho-manic

We get along fine

Someone still gets screwed !

I live alone , so there are no arguments here (none that I lose anyway) , but at family reunions that occur every 2 years we have a "no politics or religion" rule .... Dad is a liberal , sis is a gay unitarian , Grandad is an 82 year old methodist minister , aunt swims with dolphins to find the answers, cousin is a brainwashed Ann Coulter lover who actually asked my dad " why do you hate America ?

Best to just keep it to yourself , you only have one vote ....

Try to enjoy each other and practice random acts of kindness , it may catch on .....

I'm single, never married. The woman I'm dating thinks Kerry is the cat's meow, for now. I have to admit that I have a harder time relating to her having heard her rationalizations for her views. We really haven't discussed politics that much, but I feel so strongly about Kerry that I'm not sure I can get past this one.

I'm trying to adopt a "no politics stance". It is getting a little heated. I have strong views on some points, that she is not as vehement about. And she has strong views on somethings, that I don't care to take a stance on.

Looking forward to November so we can go back to talking politics. She's my favorite debating partner/opponent.