posted on Sep, 30 2011 @ 04:40 AM
Hello all, it was not too long ago that I was giving out relationship advice to a fellow ATS'er and now it seems that I am the one in need of some
My girlfriend manages a restaurant which about a month ago catered for the annual golf tournament which took place at the local country club.
Apparently everyone from the restaurant was given the numbers of staff who usually work at the country club in case they needed assistance. The
country club's staff could get them ice, beer, soda, basically anything they needed for customers but were too busy to get for themselves. Multiple
guys hit on my girlfriend that weekend but apparently one of them, a country club staff member, fixated on her (This guy was someone she had been
involved with for literally only about a week in high school, so it's been about seven years.)
Anyway, she would send him a text to get her ice or something else and he reply with something corny like "I'd do anything for you
" or "I was just
in the break room dreaming about you." Well apparently his sub-par attempts worked and eventually she was flirting with him. Now she claims that her
flirtations were more along the lines of shut-downs and veiled insults but they evolved beyond those. Eventually one night after work, she was at the
bar with some coworkers. She then made the decision to text him and ask him if he wanted to come see her at the bar. He said that he couldn't come and
she then claims that she realized what a foolish mistake she was making and told him they should stop talking. The guy agreed, she deleted his number
and they haven't spoken since.
This all came out on Tuesday of this week, I could tell that something was off between us and my gut would not let it go. I eventually came out and
asked her if there is anything she had been keeping from me and she told me the story. Obviously this was extremely upsetting to me and I came down on
her pretty hard. She claims that she would have never taken it to a physical level. However, my mind goes to the "what if's" and thinks about what
could have happened had he come to the bar that night. I must make it perfectly clear that flirting does not bother me, I am just fine if flirting
occurs, we all do it from time to time. What really bothers me is that I was anxiously waiting for her to come home that night, but she was at the bar
hoping to see another man. To me trying to meet up with someone is definitely stepping over the line.
I have since broken up with her and I am in the process of finding a new place to live. Everyone around me states that I am being extremely harsh and
that she is a great girl who just made a silly mistake. I on the other hand still dwell on the "what if's" and find it close to impossible to trust
her after this incident. I need some advice ATS, I have A LOT invested in this relationship both emotionally and financially. Am I being too hasty?
Have my emotions and ego gotten the better of me?
edit on 30-9-2011 by Sentience365 because: (no reason given)