All I can say for some of the comments in this thread is.... Wow... Some people here are quite vindictive. I know this particular situation is solved
for now by her cancelling, but it isn't in some respects, as now you have trust issues with your wife because she lied to you, but I think more so
because your went through her Facebook.
I have my own wife's Facebook password, and yet, I wouldn't spy on her because I trust her. She leaves her phone lying around all the time, I don't go
through it because I trust her. And I know she doesn't go through my Facebook or phone because that trust is mutual (she has my passwords as well).
even if she were to go through my stuff, there is nothing to find, because loyalty and honesty mean a lot to her and I.
Her lying stinks, granted, and its good that you have your evidence (since you have already made the decision to be sneaky), just in case, deity(s)
name(s) forgive, something goes south with the whole situation. I hope everything works out for you and your family. Honestly I do.
I do not, however, support being nearly so vengeful, as some folks on here recommend. For me personally, I think that its better to keep the moral
high ground and not look like a jerk following her around so you can make a scene at the proper time, or paying friends to do that for you. And mind
games are the quickest way to escalate the tiniest relationship problem into a game ender, and imagine what it would do with something big like a lie.
Mind games always exacerbate a situation.
Since, for the sake of your marriage, I don't recommend following her around, you can (obviously this is advice, not orders) do one of a couple
things. Come clean and tell her everything and hopefully you guys can forgive each other. Or you can keep the breech of privacy to yourself and ask,
today or tomorrow, what's up with him, and hopefully she says "not much, he asked to hang out and catch up, but I don't really care to hang out with
him" or something like that.
I sincerely wish you guys luck. I hope it all turns out alright. I just wish people could understand that honesty generally works best. I know honesty
can blow up in your face if you've done wrong, but the explosion and fallout will surely be worse if she finds out you did something wrong waaay after
the fact and from someone else who isn't you. Sorry, I don't mean to be preachy, and I really do hope you guys work things through. But trust and
honesty are the key.
Also, see gazrok's advice. If the guy is still after her, I'd confront him...
edit on 30-9-2011 by TruePatriot1685 because: add