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No Need To Worry About Those Pesky Zombies Anymore

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posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 04:53 PM
I know we have all been doing our darndest to find ways to deal with the comming zombie apocalypse.

We can all rest a little easier now the corporations have heard our plea.

And, of course, if you're concerned about tangling with the undead, a contract with the Zombie Apocalypse Insurance Co. ($15 a year) provides peace of mind, not to mention post-attack car repair, home reconstruction and, if necessary, relocation to a zombie-free locale.

This may be the best time to take advantage of this offer.

Once the attacks begin I know the prices for coverage will go up in a hurry.

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 05:03 PM
Wow, people will sell anything. And what's scarier is that people will buy it too.
I want to know what happens if you are turned into a zombie? Is there a pay off? Do you get your money back for failure of service? Or do they provide you with three square meals of brains to help you cope with what has happened? Do they help you find replacement limbs? Or buy cleaning supplies so that people aren't grossed out by your smell? Do they offer psychological help?

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 05:40 PM
Or you can just pay sign a document to me saying I can have all your property and I'll shoot you in the head if you turn into a zomibe.
Any takers?

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 05:41 PM
This would make a great Christmas or Birthday present, depending on how much money you've got throw away. Sort of like having a star named after someone etc.

I'm not so sure I like all this zombie stuff becoming mainstream... Now I'll just get back to playing Dead Island.

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 05:42 PM
People were worried about this? What can I say? Anyone who buys this, is a fool.

Unless you buy, like one month of it as a gag gift for some one....?


edit on 23-9-2011 by gimme_some_truth because: (no reason given)

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 05:47 PM
reply to post by hdutton

.............what if they all turn into zombies..........whose going to fulfill the obligations of the policy!

Too many risks there!

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 06:34 PM
theres a sucker born every minute

and you can bet people will be stupid enough to pay it.

i swear

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 09:45 PM
How about Alien Attack insurance? We could call it GreyCo!

"In the event of alien abduction, full coverage medical benefits are offered for counseling and for doctor visits related to probing.
Also, onsite storage is available for memory backup to deal with any possible memory loss that may occur to alien action, OR in the event of visits from MIB agents.
24 hour Real-Time GPS tracking is only available inside our solar system."

posted on Sep, 23 2011 @ 09:50 PM
I for one, should it ever occur, will take great pride in caring for my own, and have fun doing it.
I would literally go insane with the power of the kill, and feed my bloodlust for endless dead zombies.

but the fact other people would be gullible enough to waste their earnings on such a thing, well you shouldn't be too surprised.

posted on Sep, 24 2011 @ 05:13 AM
i think i might start selling Elenin insurance, any takers??

posted on Sep, 24 2011 @ 05:22 AM
reply to post by ManBehindTheMask

*Clears throat*

*Says in best deep and gravelly American film promo voice*

"In the Zompocalyspe, not even opportunistic insurance agents will be spared"

edit on 24-9-2011 by skitzspiricy because: (no reason given)

posted on Sep, 25 2011 @ 06:18 PM
That's so ridiculous...

Although, 15 dollars a year is looking like a pretty good excuse to not buy loved ones a Christmas Gift for the rest of their life.

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