posted on Aug, 22 2011 @ 06:40 PM
How does one feel when their only source of joy exits their life?
How does one find a point to living?
When one's days are spent in idle amusement – when all the amusements on offer fall so far short of that which they have lost?
How can one justify extending their stay here when there is no-one to share with?
Long empty days with no warmth
No-one to laugh at or with
No exasperating, endearing little habits to look forward to
No strange little looks that defy translation
No being taken advantage of
No-one to twist ones arm into doing something one would rather not do
How does one cope when confronted with one's own empty soul every day?
When the only thing that filled it with delight has gone forever?
How to carry on when one finds oneself over the brink, and doesn't wish to find the way back?
When every day becomes a battle to do that one thing that will finally release one from one's bondage
What is it? That thing that has to be done so that one can depart this Earth
Long, desolate days ahead with no light, no joy, no sharing, no irritation, no fun
A pointless, empty life devoid of the companionship that eased one's passage through a cruel and lonely world
Uprooted from a warm, chaotic place and re-planted in a clean and sterile atmosphere
Without the only joy, the only comfort, the light of one's life
So sad, but beyond sadness
Way past Misery, an old friend who will miss out on this particular pain
Although, way past pain, too
Not even numb, way past that
Just hopeless, simply hopeless
Without hope for a brighter tomorrow
Without hope for an escape form hopelessness
A pointless life, no more sharing, no more warmth
Just a lack. A lack of the only thing that made life worth living or even tolerable
Cast adrift without one's lifeline to the world
Seeking small compensations and finding none, or very few
Nothing left, no point to it all
No-one to be here for
Nothing to be here for
Just carry on haunting a life that is no longer desired or desirable
Cold, sterile life with no meaning
No point to any of it
No sleep to draw comfort from
Just meaningless dozing and a deep desire to wake up dead
Empty vessel – heart ripped out long ago
Appeal to soul to find meaning for this empty, pointless life to continue
Get through each day and watch the will to live slipping ever further away
Nothing left, nothing to live for
Nothing to die for, either
Pointless and hopeless
No reason to be here
No reason not to be here
No reason for anything. No reason for nothing
No joy forever, now
No more warmth
No more ingratitude
Empty, pointless life
Going on, sapping will to even exist
Anywhere, as anything
One desire left, to turn out the light and be dark forever
Had enough now. Don't want any more
Joy all gone, never to return
Feelings out now, never to return
Another part of me has died – farewell. I know it wanted to go
So little left. Death by a thousand cuts. Not many pieces left now for life to cut from me
I'll be all gone soon
I don't want to resurrect the automatic pilot. I'll see it through this time
Stay and be numb
Stay and take the despair
Learn to live with the nothing
Learn to cope with being Hopeless.