Trying to Prepare When No One Around You Believes In It

I have yet to hear someone cover this theme specifically but I could be wrong.

Just about every survival tenet one reads expresses the need for strength in numbers. Survival works better in groups. You have more talent to draw upon, more resources, more help if needed, and more moral support. But what happens when those around you (family, spouse, significant others, close friends, etc.) do not share your beliefs or enthusiasm?

This is a dilemma I face. I am not about to dump overboard those around me because I see them as a little myopic when it comes to preparedness. BUT... It sure makes it hard to facilitate healthy family decisions when you are the lone voice. Now, I am not advocating all those close to me to pick up lock, stock, and barrel and move to a cave in Guatemala. (For those of you with a cave in Guatemala, rest easy) But when it comes to spending money or putting forth effort I feel like I am the loony for even mentioning it.

I love to garden. I recently purchase a dehydrator to get a little more mileage out of this years production. Unless I do it myself, it will not get done. Any attempt to discuss the issue results in the "fact" of electricity to store produce in the refrigerator. Prepare meats in the smoker? No way. There is plenty of meat at the store. Whenever I buy items for the long term, I get the smiles, the nods, the "C'mon Dad what on earth is that for?".

Do not get me wrong, I love my family. I want to be prepared to take care of them. I want them to be ready even if just slightly. I do not ask my kids to be able to fashion a shelter from grass clippings or expect my Mother-in-Law to start a fire with sticks in the pouring rain.

I am looking for a way to demonstrate to them the need to be less dependent on the thin veneer of technology around them. I want to make them know there may come a day when they need to depend on the knowledge in their heads and the skills in their hands versus purchasing their way out of discomfort. Taking them camping only goes so far. Power outages only last so long (darn those efficient electrical company employees).

Keep up your skills and when the SHTF who is the hero they WILL follow? The guy who puts food in their mouth when the fridge is rotten and the stores long looted, thatś who. A lot of us Quazy Dads feel the same but I figured I know what will get through and it will take the loss of their safe little world to make the Quazy Dads into heroes
seed

reply to post by mustard seed


"Hero" "Quasi Dads"

Great stuff! Good motivation. Thanks.

I empathize with your situation. I'm recently married, and though my wife is very open-minded, I don't get the sense she would respond very favorably to what in her mind would constitute being overly prepared for when the SHTF. But then again, for most ATS'ers, that's life.

My advice would be to invest in the cheapest survival choices you can accommodate; canned food, bottled water bought in bulk etc...

Though I will say your post raises a very real and valid point; how to prepare for the worst when your spouse/family perceive such preparations to be unnecessary, or worse yet, crazy. If you're right, then your family will be provided for when things go bad. If they're right, then I guess you'll just have a surplus of water and beans.

I say do what you can to prepare for the future, so long as you don't sacrifice too much in the present.

i so understand, i feel like Marie Antoinette reincarnated in many dozens of people i know.

they talk about how much better japanese steaks are, and are worth the money, even if it's 400$ for a meal.

lufthansa has the best 1st class when flying to paris.

and electricity never goes out, end of conversation.

and the rest are only interested in entertainment.

i have camping equipment and volunteer for a disaster response team, so everyone laughs at me and call me a survivalist.

if we had even a small earthquake, i'd be the only one who could make a cup of coffee.

my sympathy, i understand.

I feel your frustration. Recently i've brought up the subject in casual conversation to a couple of family members because I worry about their safety if something does happen and I don't want them to be caught off guard. The first one I approached and brought it up in a casual conversation and they just kind of blew it off. The second one flatly stated that they didn't want to know. It bothers me but I don't let it worry me because at least I know i've tried to open their eyes.
Even if nothing happens, with the price of food going up all the time and job security an issue, it just seems smart to me to have some extra stored away.

I think a lot of people have the same issue. I have been able to convince my family, and we have made great strides in the past year. One thing I found was that my wife would shut off when I told her how things in America were going to get worse, she didn't want to hear it. It really was a self defense mechanism, she doesn't want to hear the lifestyle she knows could end, but there is a strong possibility it will. Most people will agree that something is coming, but they don't know what to do about it.

I think it would be beneficial to review the stages of grief.
www.memorialhospital.org...

You will see the first as Denial and Isolation, where is where most are.

We have spent the past year focus on lifestyle that is self sustaining.

Educate your family on world events, and what is happening. Talk practically about it being a possibility that lifestyles could change. What will you do to be prepared for such and event. Talk about situations that have happened in recent history, like Katrina, and what happened during that time (looting, weapon confiscation, etc...)

For me my breakthrough moment was with my wife, talking about how we are going to protect our children and what steps were we making to ensure their survival on the day where we could not go to the grocery store.

We are very prepared for whatever might happen. Hopefully we never need to be self sustaining, but we are capable. Our children know where their food comes from, and are able to produce it if necessary.

When TSHTF you won't have time for sympathy while those who are unprepared try to drain you of resources. Family or not you need to be prepared to cut them off. Like those guys in the 50's who build nuclear bunkers in their backyards and everyone laughed at them well if the time ever did come guess where they were gonna be rushing too.

If people won't listen and prepare themselves it's not up to you to save them.

I'm in a similar position and have been gradually stocking up food.

I've been able to fend off the smug and the nosy with excuses of food price hikes and annual power outages thanks to our crumbly 1930s mains supply. I aquired an old generator which is being fitted with an exhaust and heat exchanger.

As for the food and water, I've gone for non-acidic food in tins and acidic contents (pickles, fruit, preserves and oils) in glass jars only. These all have longer shelf lives. Avoid stashing clear plastic bottles as their shelf life is much shorter than you'd expect. Use LDPE or HDPE (e.g. opaque milk bottles) for containing water.

Dried pasta and 20Kg bags of rice which can be found for a very reasonable price at cash and carry or Asian/Continental food markets - much cheaper than the small bags in supermarkets.

A good friend who works in the gardening / decorative fish industry tells me that plastic water tanks of all types are shooting up in price. He can't explain why but I can hazard a guess.

If people think you're mad, just remind them that the £20 note in their pocket could be worth £5 tomorrow and you may need to remind them that they are living on an overcrowded island (like me).

The bottom line is that if the food stops coming in, we starve.
No point trying to grow your own food while there's a panic going on. Our local allotment growers already have food stolen from the ground! Just make sure you have enough for yourself and family for a few weeks should a panic ensue.

Toilet rolls can double as insulation
UK - A shotgun certificate can be applied for without reason given. Approved gun cabinet required.

Until we can all feed ourselves from the ground again, we will always be at the mercy of the food importers. It makes sense to always put something away.

Originally posted by kro32
When TSHTF you won't have time for sympathy while those who are unprepared try to drain you of resources. Family or not you need to be prepared to cut them off. Like those guys in the 50's who build nuclear bunkers in their backyards and everyone laughed at them well if the time ever did come guess where they were gonna be rushing too.

If people won't listen and prepare themselves it's not up to you to save them.

Spoken like someone who does not have a wife and kids or if so perhaps should not. I do not want to be the freaking Omega Man and will gladly die WITH my loved ones if it is a choice of saving myself over my loved ones.
seed

reply to post by mustard seed


I wasn't referring to your kids or wife but others around you that you may care about. Neighbors, friends, cousins stuff like that.

You can't help them all after they wouldn't listen to you before.

reply to post by ABNARTY



leading by example quietly sometimes gets others to reflect on things. laying down the law as the man of the house is a more direct way to curtail some activities while encouraging others. limiting how much time big screen TV's are on and viewed is reasonable and that can apply to video game consoles and PC's as well. balance is very important in life. adults/parents may have to take an unpopular stance from time to time, but if you wish to instill traits and knowledge that you feel are positive, important & beneficial to the lives of your children, then so be it.

when children used to join Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts they had opportunity to earn Merit Badges by proving they completed and learned from participating in specific tasks related to a given skill set. MB's were displayed with pride for they had been earned. They were also part of moving upward in rank.

perhaps you could plan family time in which you and your children participate together. by thinking ahead and outlining what was necessary to achieve a desired result you will know what raw materials you need to gather ahead of time and put on paper the steps your group will take to achieve the desired goal. taking your children with you to the lumberyard, hardware store, nursery etcetera will expose them to what these merchants have to offer. it will also give time together, show them the flip side of online shopping, and give you a chance to mention the importance of supporting small business in your community.

by doing tasks (gardening, recycling, stocking goods etcetera) on your own you will lead by example. by having your children participate in a planned family function weekly you will instill in them what they need to know and learn as well as the importance of time shared together and working with others.

you may receive some grumbling, bitching and moaning but by taking the adult lead you are going to give your children sweet memories they will fondly recall when they are adults. i wish there were more Dads like you who give a damn, and are willing and able to teach their children well. bless your heart my friend and best of luck to you.

reply to post by ABNARTY


You are the Sheepdog guarding the flock. Don't let your family side-track you. Tell them it's your hobby, after all they have theirs, don't they? You can eveen get high and mighty and tell them that your hobby at least produces something.

I have been in a tornado where there were a couple girls who refused to believe what was going on around them. We literally had to drag them to shelter. When we exited, that was when they freaked out after seeing the destruction. Some people just willingly refuse that something bad may happen to them.

Take care of your family, but beware the predetors. They'll be out in force when the time comes.

Eh,the less,the better.
So they won't listen to you,much like my situation.
But hey,I will take care of my kids and my wife,and for the rest,well
I told you so!

reply to post by ABNARTY


wow!!! I thought I was the only dad/husband out here that felt like this~! BIG S&F here!

Interesting to note, I just went to a gun & knife show on Sat, ALOT of guns & knifes, about a 80,000sq/ft facilities worth~! Talked to a few people and one in particular survivalist/sales guy (he was more of the first than the second) which was selling handmade para-cord bracelets, and we got to talking about pricing and at the end of the covo' said.. 'bah.. i keep forgetting that's POST collapse" then grinned..

well.. I've been slowing, for about 6 months now, about how we need a BOB and A,B,C plan...it's kinda a one sided subject with the wife and then it goes dead and onward to life..

I feel ya ......4 grand-kids, a wife, step daughter and her live-in bf.............a couple of which are not in any physical shape to go a trekking across any type of rough terrain let alone a blocks worth of flat concrete. If the SHTF.....i have no idea what we would do except head for the cascades .....if we can get that far..

i am not a fan of the survival in numbers mentality.

sure it has alot of pros to it but it has the biggest con that any survival credo has.

more people can stab you in the back.

doesnt matter to me if people dont beleive you or they dont want to beleive it.

for anyone with a little faith

noone beleived in noahs cause either til the flood came and then they went "oh crap..........argh."

show your kids footage of hurricane katrina.

the real footage not the clips from the news.

It's hard,isn't it,this knowing? I've felt an urgent need to prepare for years..had more conversations with family and friends than I care to recall about what I believe is coming and a need to prepare for it.

My conclusion is this;WE know what needs to be done and why,and it isn't so imperative that those we care for do in order for us ourselves to begin preparing in the best way we know how to. In the end,we'll be as ready for any contingency as we can be,for ourselves and those closest to us.And unless we have access to or have built for ourselves a decent well stocked underground shelter,none of it will matter.As far as aligning ourselves with outsiders to our family? Um,I'm thinking if push comes to shove,if we aren't real bad a$$es,when things get tight for them,they'll take what they need from me,if they can. Kinda rather go it alone awhile.

Just my thoughts. Carry on.

reply to post by ABNARTY


Trust me when I say that I feel your pain.
I have been preparing for over three years.
My husband thinks that I'm crazy and wasting
his hard earned money.
He was even letting strangers look into my
pantry.He was wanting someone else to agree
with him.I saw the look on that last one's face,
I just know that he was thinking this is where
he will loot first.
I have tried to get some of my supplies sent to
a hiding place,he won't let me do that either.He
even gave several boxes away to some friends.
My husband believes in the pre-trib rapture and
I don't.
I hope your family wakes up soon and keep stocking
up.

reply to post by mamabeth


awww thats kinda horibal.. my wife is the same way but she at least knows things can tople anyday