It Came From Beyond The Page
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange æons even death may die.
-- Abdul Alhazred, The Necronomicon
ThePunisher carefully opened the dust-covered, moth-eaten grimoire believed to be bound in human skin and began reading from it aloud, intoning
in a dread voice which only hinted of the hoary iniquity contained within the tome's accursed pages.
A shadow fell over AboveTopSecret.com as a beast more ancient than the firmament and terrifying beyond the feeble capacity of the human mind to
comprehend rose from the mouldering, foetid, malodourous depths of the Paranormal Studies forum.
His eyes alight with supernal frenzy,
ThePunisher held the thick, mephitic librum aloft and shouted shrilly through a penumbra of impenetrable
tenebrosity punctuated by crashes of thunder:
"Behold! The Confessions of a Dark Sorceror!"
...and here I am.
Whom doth disturb the timeless slumber of my dread magnum opus? ^
^
Sorcery, Fantasy Or Trickery?
Actually, I still find this whole subject fascinating, especially with the benefit of some time having passed.
Did I start this thread with the intent of deceiving or tricking anyone?
Nope.
I readily confess that much of it has a Lovecraftian flavor to it, but that's because I am an undying fan of Lovecraft and his work. His style has
influenced my writing since I first read (and re-read countless times) his many works as a boy.
So when writing of something like sorcery, you can expect me to apply some poetic license. After all,
when don't I?
Geez, just read any of my other posts. Yes, there's a pattern.
I Know What You Did Summer Before Last
I think I disclaimed things adequately enough in the thread. I mean
damn, if you missed them somehow, you may want to start over and read it
again.
To recap some key points:
1. The things I claim as fact in this thread are fact. I dabbled in Wiccan magic long ago, seem to have inadvertently gotten in over my head and,
amidst a growing pile of ultimatums from my wife at the time and my own realization that something was terribly wrong after seeing a shadow on the
wall, gave up the practice.
2. During the course of this thread (which was originally intended to get some of this off my chest after so many years of not talking about it and
harboring some unfair prejudices toward Wicca, more than anything), as an apparent consequence of revisiting some of my old exploits, some new
exploits took place.
3. I reported these exploits as honestly as I could, and in some parts of the thread, I reported them almost in real time.
4. All the experiences, spiritual and otherwise, which I described in this thread were absolutely real to me. Whether they correspond to some sort of
universal objective truth, I don't know. But they were real to me, were meaningful to me, and remain very much so to this day.
5. I first met up with fellow ATSer
Paul_Richard in this thread, and continue to maintain an association with the Society of Light. As a
skeptic, of course, I don't necessarily agree with everything Paul may say, but he is unquestionably a capable and experienced mystic whom I hold in
high regard. I intend to learn from his example as long as I may.
6. Though I don't make such a big deal of it these days, I continue to meditate very frequently. Indeed, meditation has become an intrinsic part of
my life, and I incorporate it into virtually everything I do. I recommend it highly, and in particular the Heart Chakra Radiance techniques espoused
by the Society of Light. Very, very helpful for anyone, in my opinion.
7. I am still very much fascinated with this subject and continue to study a wide variety of sources related to it. I am finding the process to be
very rewarding and stimulating.
8. Since I am known to be bipolar (I've tended to be rather close with that information in the past, for reasons I hope can be understood), skeptics
may reasonably dismiss all this as delusion or psychosis associated with a manic episode. Not only am I not offended by that suggestion, but I offer
it myself. Maybe I'm just a maniac, and that's all this is. No harm, no foul. However...
9. Being crazy doesn't make me wrong.
10. As noted in my
Yoshiel exploits, I personally think the whole prophet business was
self-delusion on my part. I also wouldn't be surprised if all of this is. Maybe I am hopelessly deluded. Maybe all of us are.
11. Nonetheless, I still find the "supernatural" experiences cataloged here intriguing, and if nothing else, they provide insight into myself to a
degree rarely found in written form. Truly, I called it like I saw it, and whatever opinions others may have of all this, I am proud that I did.
12. I am perhaps a little ashamed of some of the personal disclosures that exist in this thread, and how it may be nothing more than a window into the
mind of a madman, but I do not regret this thread and, in fact, consider it to be one my finest contributions to ATS.
13. As documented above, several members expressed a desire that this thread be laid to rest, and I respected those wishes. However, I am more than
willing to discuss any aspect of this story and its contents if anyone wants to, either in this thread or a new one.
Post-Epilogue
I hope that sums up my position reasonably well, but as mentioned, I am very much open to questions and discussions of anything contained in this
thread.
Hmm. Now that it's been brought up, I think I may want to read through it again myself. Or at least skim through it.
Something that's bugged me about my posts here is the presence of all those question marks which replaced my curly quotes as a consequence of an ATS
database migration. As I find time, I think I'd like to clean those up, if that wouldn't be considered misuse of my moderator powers in this
forum.
As for the content itself, despite my neurotic perfectionism and possible embarrassment over some of it, I wouldn't want to change a single word.
Let history, and my fellow members, judge me as they will.
[edit on 4/9/2006 by Majic]
