Kuroibunshi: For me at least, humility is an ongoing process, and an absolute state of being I doubt I will ever achieve. As I stagger back and
forth between humility and arrogance like a drunkard, however, I think I come to understand each of these things a little better.
Midnight Watchman: Don’t believe anything I post! That doesn’t mean I am lying to you, but it means that you should never assume that I am
telling the truth, either. I can tell you I am being honest in my writings here, but that I am also certain that I am a prisoner of illusion.
Who’s to say I’m really honest, anyway? Not me. I catch myself drifting into little deceptions and self-delusions all the time. My little turns of
phrase, witticisms, multiple entendres and general literary style might themselves be considered deceptions, albeit benign deceptions designed to
inspire thought. Where should I draw the line?
I am certain that I cannot be 100% honest, no matter how hard I try -- and I try very hard, so please bear that in mind. Thus my insistence that you
not look to others for truth, but within.
MKULTRA: Thanks for some excellent insights into all this. I agree that what we call “sanity” is somewhat arbitrary at best, and based on a
definition founded upon norms derived from rampant mass insanity at worst.
While I do anguish at times over whether I’ve really “lost it”, I become less concerned as I come to see how easily I can slip back into comfortable
illusions of normalcy if I ever feel the need.
Thus while I can explore some rather strange places and experiences, it seems unlikely that I will ever become lost in them. That only seems possible
if I should ever abandon skepticism in favor of blind faith.
As for seeking power before knowledge, I must still watch myself carefully here. Where you may be drawn more toward a path of light, my propensity
seems to be toward darkness. Thus I must always be extremely cautious, since temptation is always with me, and will probably never leave me.
I suppose I could consider my tendency to stray into darkness as a burden, but it is at least one which has already taught me a great deal, and will
no doubt continue to teach me in the times ahead. I suppose we’ll see.
As always, thanks one and all for the feedback and advice!
Majic
[edit on 9/17/2004 by Majic]






