posted on Aug, 11 2011 @ 05:35 AM
Ok, another comet E thread, you think… Guilty, your honor… but actually I don’t wanna discuss the validity of all the theories whether comet E
is going to hit earth as a comet, a long lost planet or one the 7 dwarfs. I’m not interested in his responsability for all the disasters this year
be it earthquakes, volcano eruptions or my personal financial crisis…
I simply wanna state that it is amazing how a tiny little comet became the harbinger of doom in just less than 6 months…
Yesterday my best friend called me, puzzled and asked me if I heard about the comet. I asked him why. He told me that his sister and her daughter are
preparing themselves for the impact. She and her daughter know for a fact (the internet) that a certain comet is going to hit earth in october and
that the best thing we can hope for are some earthquakes and tsunamis. She already knew the end was near but originally it was scheduled for 2012 and
she thought she still had some time. He asked me for help. I told him that she was talking about comet E and that this was all bs and just your
everyday doomsday theory. He told me she was so embarrassed she could hardly speak. He wanted to calm her and asked me if I could send him some more
info that would back up my words. I just said: "You know, there’s a nifty little search engine called google…” but he interrupted me and said
he didn’t find anything useful there… So I googled myself and guess what? He was right! with a ratio 10:1 the doomsday proclamations outweighed
the scientific explanations! (we are talking about german hits since his English is not the best) I remembered that last time I checked (2 months ago)
it was approx. 1:1 or 2:1 at the most… What has happened?
So I read most of the links and I started to realize that the story was like the proverbial snowball turning into an avalanche. The story gained
momentum and grew bigger with every passing day . The chronological order goes something like this:
10.12.2010 Lucky bastard and amateur astronomer Leonid Elenin discovered comet E
"Potentially dangerous? Nah... Too small, too far away (you wish!)"
January 2011 - Sorry, say again. What was the name of the guy? Leonid Elenin??? That's no real name!!!! That's the most obvious cover-up since the
faked moon landing! Leonid ELE-NIN!!! Get it?
Hm, I thought... Sounds russian to me. But what do I know... Being a huge fan of riddles I tried to solve it myself: leonid, leonid.... There was a
sowjet union leader called leonid brezhnev... One down two to go... Ele... is the first syllable of elephant! That was easy... And the last one...
Yessss... Anais NIN, the famous writer of erotic literature and lover of Henry Miller!!!! When I finished praising my vast common knowledge I tried to
make sense of it... A russian leader making love to an elephant? Though the thought of it is amusing where is the doom...? So what did the other kids
came up with? I asked my good old pal google again.
Leonids are a meteor shower... Okay
E-L-E = extinction level event (god, I loved the movie! Remembering the scene at the beach with tea leoni and max schell I still get tears in my
ELEven NINe - self-explanatory (for all the non-europeans out there: the russians have the european date format... Just read it backwards... NO NOT
enin nevele!!! NINE ELEVEN!)
I see... Actually I liked my solution better but let's go with the flow...
Ok, so this is uncanny... But it's getting better...
March 2011 - extinction level event eleven nine or short elenin is no comet! It's a brown dwarf!!! Wtf? As if a dwarf star isn't enough bad news, it
is brown too! (tbh I had no clue what a brown dwarf was but thanks to wiki) - ok, now it's time to start getting worried...
April 2011 - NASA is confirming the bad news! Expecting a press release I was a little dispappointed when i saw a youtube video with very ugly
graphics of planetary alignments provided by a program from JPL (isn't there an xbox version with hd graphics?) ok, in short: all the major
earthquakes including fukushima were caused by brown elenin! And we have NASA to back it up! I immediately made a list of items I may need in the next
May 2011 - Chinese scientists say, that brown elinin is not coming alone! There are alien spacecrafts right behind... Viciously hiding in the coma...
Reading it I almost fell into coma too... A brown dwarf hitting eath AND an alien invasion??? I briefly thought if brown elenin destroys earth what
are the aliens here for? to search the debris? To broadcast the descruction live to their homeworld? But I was too depressed to follow that
Ok friends... So it's goodbye then... We are done... One last month... How are you going to spend it? Any ideas...?
PS: just in case, that E is just a comet, 2-3 km in size and passing earth in a safe distance of 0,23 AU: does anybody know how to convert the
underground shelter in my garden into a swimmingpool?