OP s+F An excellent poem
Shows an real depth of self understanding, and also awareness, of where you are.
Have you ever thought of writing a poem from the opposite place?
as if all was well?
as if you were writing a poem in 6 months time, and the possibility that you might look back accept and feel that at this time its true, but at that
time it is not anymore, and you can see this time with a different experience?
I have been heartbroken and truly thought would never happy again, never smile again, never have joy again.
Looking at a diary 6 months later, I realised that it would have been soo much easier to get to happiness, joy and hope again was one thing.
Warning what I write below might make you angry, upset etc I make NO EXCUSE for this as its your choice, it is not directed an any person on this
thread and certainly not the OP, unless it reasonates with them and they want to accept it, it is an story of my experiences of depression and how I
got out, mixed with some very brutal honesty to those who might read this and be in that place now.
I was focusing soo much on what was "missing" "wrong" "bad" "negative", that I couldn't even let the light in. Even if it was in my life, and looking
back help and love was there, I did not see it as such, did not notice the opportunity, because I had blocked it out endlessly focusing on what I did
not like, want or had happened, rather than focusing on what I wanted, How I wanted to feel, what opportunities and blessings were there.
Please look at the following link below this post, a bit of my personal history there, I DO know where you are now, I HAVE been there, I did find a
quick way out (though this was many years ago and a different way, this way I offer through a friend for free has helped my clients, and also friends
BE HAPPY in weeks at the most.)
I say the following to all who are in that place now, and it from love and compassion and also experience of it myself. If it pushes your buttons GOOD
and think about that.
DEPRESSION LOVES THE PAST AND FANTASY
DEPRESSION LOVES DEPRESSION
DEPRESSION LOVES EXCUSES
DEPRESSION LOVES ITSELF AND NOTHING ELSE
Whats YOUR EXCUSE to be SAD DEPRESSED?
what do you gain from DEPRESSED? (sympathy, excuses?)
Where you abused as a kid or adult Physically, Emotionally Sexually Financially Spiritually?
Good excuse? NOT you must actually love your abuser and want to be like them, you are abusing yourself and all others around you. You are copying
them! you are becoming like them more and more as you are getting more and more down.
If thats your excuse it a lie as shown. How can I say that poor people upset reading this, you dont understand etc....another excuse to not think why
what I say that may make you angry or even more upset.
Me my story as a kid trust me got the badge, uniform and experience and many more than most, abused, all forms EVERY care giver I was with did it one
way or another.
It was my excuse to be like the abusers for years to be angry, sad, self hate just like them.
Homeless or no secure accomadation?
Lived in subways when 17 for a while, lived in homeless communities. On streets to run away from abuse at 13 yrs 14 yrs much at least 2-3 nights a
Oh please financial depression I will accept from someone in the somali famine camps, if you have food every day, clothes and medical things its an
Cared for a member of my family rather than them going into secure mental unit, lost my business set up for 10 years. The state could provide no help
for care, 10 year business down the drain that I started seeing clients by walking miles in the rain with holes in my shoes.
Current client base that I had to let go, and growth from that point in 2005 to now would be £100k a year and more.
Had no income for six months at all NONE, sold most of my things and all savings gone at the time, no state help they wont if you choose to leave a
job or employment business, I had no choice they wont care the person If I do they say I am making myself unemployed. Then £48 per week for 3 years
caring 80 hours a week and more.
Please excuse you are still alive make the most of what you have look at Stephen Hawking, what good bits of you have you focused on?
What works well that you can develop. "oh MY poor back" syndrome Depression loves people taking ownership making it an thing that seems there forever
cant be changed.
Take ownership of "oh my wonderful artistic skills" See the link below and read rest of my story and the FREE solution if you are on a Physical
Illness trip/excuse Again a bigger badge than 99% of people who are depressed based on this. Please read my link.
Please do me a favor I was beaten up many times im white, by whites, with a close friend who was from Caribean Backround Dad, Indian Mum, "paki Lover"
and all that, seen him smashed up many times, bricks through windows when in school studying in a very impoverished area, bullied at school.
Whats he doing now Training Director for one of the largest Blue Chips in Europe. MBA Bsc whilst being beaten up younger at same time of life, he was
doing voluntary work in the community to help the type of youth who were abusing him, training them, teaching them so they would have a good
Get my drift?
Its the truth, and if anyone would have been saying that to me when I was in that, place I would have been Angry, Upset and thinking but you dont
understand, I DO and I just wished someone would have been honest with me and give me a kick up the arse.
I wasted Months of my life on excuses, wondering why things were soo bad and getting worse, but all I was doing thinking about and reinforcing was the
excuses, reasons and very things I was complaining about.
In my book if anyone is depressed and wants to stay there, fine free will, but be honest and admit its an choice.
If you are depressed and saying actually want to be happy want to not be this way, GREAT but realise that its not "out There" or "their" fault "this
happened" to me reason, its a CHOICE.
When did you choose to be depressed and why?
When do you plan to choose not to be depressed?
If you can choose to be depressed because that's all it is, then imagine what other positive choices you can make.
What happened to me?
I started spending as much time by CHOICE to do so, focusing on what was good, where I wanted to be and go, not had been, decided not to be the same
as those who abused me, was I not hating myself by being like them , as surely you hate your abuser?
Asking myself "what 1 thing can I do today to get/achieve/be/come closer to "
then as that builds now its every day for years "what 10 things can I do today NOW to "
Different life, feelings, experiences, health, finances etc within just 12 weeks.
How long have you laid in bed with your depression?
How long have you embraced welcomed and thanked it asked for more by focusing on it?
When did you CHOOSE to let events situation and people from the PAST or even now to take all your power and free will away?
When will you choose to be happy, healthy, wealthy, joyful and of benefit to those around you?
WHY ON EARTH NOT NOW?
Choice Love the Depression and all the excuses, then shut up and stop sharing it spreading it.
Choose the opposite of what you complain about to yourself and others.
The energy of anger has a flip side of the coin, imagine if all that focus energy and feeling was one of love and focusing as a drive to achieve
instead soo simple use the energy flip it spin it so thats its opposite.
Same for all emotions
Fear flip it = Confidence etc.
My story and Solution for you.
Simple Solution to Riots etc
Love to all really and honestly.
Edit to add story out today proves what I was saying above:
Balme Causes us to be sick
edit on 10-8-2011 by MischeviousElf because: (no