Welcome to the Mental Health Response Line....

Welcome to the Mental Health Hotline...

If you're obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly...
If you're co-dependant, ask someone to press 2 for you...
If you're paranoid, we know where you are, we know what you want, stay on the line and we'll trace your call...
If you're delusional, press 7 and you're call will be transferred to the closest mothership...
If you're depressive, doesn't matter what number you press, no one will answer you...
If you're schizophrenic, press any number, and just tell yourself you'll get through...
If you're dyslexic, press 696969696...
If you've suffered a drug induced psychosis, please press the hash key...
If you've suffered short term memory loss, please call back later...
If you've an superiority complex, you're next in the queue...
If you've an inferiority complex, the operator is too busy to talk to you...
If you're anxious, please wait for the beep, please wait for the beep, please wait for the beep, please wait for the beep.

These lines were from a track I found, although it was a dubstep track, the acapella was amusing.

On that note, anyone else have another Mental Health Response line funny lines??

Good One.......

If you believe in Nibiru press the invisible button, no one will ever see you