OFFICIAL!!! The Beatles brought forth the end of the world!!!!

Now.. this is just a theory of mine but you will soon see how good i am at making stuff fit into whatever box i want it to.

I have been doing science research for many many years. 40 yrs in fact. I am 33 yrs old and spent 7 yrs studying in the womb (it was a long and painfull pregnancy).

I have found over my many many years of scientific research a direct undeniable link between the beatles and the coming of the end of days!!

Now.. stay with me on this one as its based on the UK LP releases spanning the length of their carreer.

Please Please Me (1963)

In 1963 the band was formed as a joint MI6 and CIA operation as part of operation artichoke and also cointelpro. This first album was actualy writen by the ex-nazi scientist Wernher von Braun and was tested on monkeys who... during testing.. they noticed that the female monkeys would jump around screaming whilst the male monkeys became pacified and subservient. I have sources for this.. usually BBQ and Tomato.

With The Beatles (1963)

Quickly after the first release.. Majestic staff were brought in to write a second album for the puppet band to sing. The title itself was an exercise in mind control to quite litterally people get the world to feel like they were "with the beatles". When this album is played on its original vinyl... the listener would become mesmerised and actually beleive that they were sitting at home having tea with the beatles.

A Hard Day's Night (1964)

This is the first Elenin reference made by the band via the shadow government of both the UK and the US. The title being a play on words regarding "night" meaning "space" and the "hard days" being the trouble to come via the large planetoid shooting towards earth on its odd orbit.

Beatles for Sale (1964)

This WAS actualy referencing the very real SALE of the Beatles to communist Russia. For the next few years the Russians used the Beatles as a propaganda tool to help continue the cold war between themselves and the US. All songs were written by Viktor Vladimirovich Khartov and were designed to instil fear into the American and British people... however.. it was found not work on German's.. and science still has not found out why?!?

Help! (1965)

This album was the first album to actually be written by Paul and John and was a very real cry for "Help!" as they did not like their new Russian homes and wished america and the UK to buy them back. This did take a while for America to raise the funds via the black budget to buy the band back to safety and continue with their experiments. Finally ariving back in the UK in september 1966.

Rubber Soul (1965)

A very clear and obvious message lays within the title of this album. The title of the album is an anagram of "Rubble Ours" which references the destruction of the planet.. and that the remaining "Rubble" will be "Ours" or belong to the British/American coalition. So.. they message was already being sent out to eager listeners!

Revolver (1966)

This album was a reference to the american people to take up arms in preperation to protect themselves from the oncoming cataclism.. if only the Beatles had named the album "giant ELE proof bunker" instead.. maybe we would have noticed the reference sooner.

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band (1967)

Sgt. Pepper was the knickname the US military gave to the chemical "agent orange". And the "lonely hearts club band" was a reference to those that lost loved ones during its use in the vietnam war. Also if you rearrange the letters the way i want you to .. then it spells "A Cabbed Helper Lens Sloppy Runt" which refers to astronomers giving sloppy data to the public via the internation telescopes in existance.

The Beatles (aka the White Album) (1968)

Sold back to the USSR.. again for propaganda reasons.. hence the song "back in the USSR".. however the Beatles were not "lucky" to be there.

Yellow Submarine (1969)

Which is an anagram of "Beware Noisy Mull". Mull being the technical NASA term for a large ELE sized planetoid heading towards earth... im sure Mull stands for something but not being a NASA employee I do not have access to that information right now.. but i will make something up later on when i think of it.

Abbey Road (1969)

Probably one of the most infamous anagrams in music history! "Aboard Bye" directly references the Bands and governments plan to leave earth in early 2012 on a spaceship built by mr Von Braun in the early 60's. I have seen a model of the "Ark" on youtube so it must be real! also it was on some movie i watched once.

Let It Be (1970)

The subbliminal messages within this album give the listener a complacent feeling and continued use can have serious side affects leading to the well documented "sheeple" syndrome with leaves the victim lifeless, energyless and unable to stand up for their basic human rights.


Now... notice that all of these albums on vinyl were ROUND!!!!! ROUND!!!!!!!

Thats when i really put the pieces together! All the albums were ROUND just like our solar system and our planet!!!!! I was like holy **** sauce its totally true!!!!

So.. as of today.. i no longer listen to the beatles.. instead i have switched to Elvis.

Your thoughts on my theory?!?!?

This just proves that you can make a conspiracy out of everything.

Well, that's how I see this thread. S&F, sir!

Get a job! And a haircut!

Now THAT was funny!

Second line to say

Originally posted by iSwag
This just proves that you can make a conspiracy out of everything.

Well, that's how I see this thread. S&F, sir!

edit on 8-7-2011 by iSwag because:

Hehehe.. cheers bro! That was the exact point i was trying to get across based on a thread i just read involving the beatles.... quite bizarr how people make things fit into their strange realities!

cio!

Originally posted by Hawking
Get a job! And a haircut!

Funny you should say that .. as i wrote that entire post during work... I do however need a haircut!!!!!

HOW DID YOU KNOW!!!!

I will PM you the next time i am in need of your psychic services!!!

I love it.

The most thorough hypothesis I have read in at least 20 minutes.


S&F

What - NO mention of Michael Jackson being killed by McCartney and Sony??

Heck,

MJ stated ages ago that he was bequeathing the Beatles copywrite ownership back to Paul on his death...

Paul was whining that he had to pay a royalty to sing his own songs.
Sony had a 50th Beatles anniversary game and remastered editions ready to go.
Neither would have wanted MJ to profit off his copywrite ownership for their hard work....

Great Post anyways!
.

reply to post by CitizenNum287119327


No.. sorry mate.. I was focussing on complete rubbish as opposed to actual facts. I did find that the whole MJ and Beatles thing to be a tad much.. however.. good old wacko obviously had better business sense than that of Paul Mcartney and the rest of the gang.

Oh man I didn't realize this was in the Jokes section. By the time I got to the end I was like either this guy is joking or is crazy. I'm glad it's the first... I think.

Anyway another great example of how people try to connect two unrelated things to try to prove their theory. But it also made me think, what happens if some government did create a band or music to try to influence pop culture. I'm sure it's happened before, maybe in Nazi Germany.

Nice thread, Let it Be is my favorite Album by the way.

reply to post by asmall89


Yeah lol.. I am glad that you worked out i am not a complete loon! however.. some people do shock you on this website i must admit.

deny ignorance?

Really?

Hard to fathom with some of the utter **** theories that people "make up".. and its dissapointing too as it makes the rest of us look bad, unplausable and generaly stupid. =(

Cheers for stopping by and having a giggle.

P.S.. my fave beatles album is the magical mystery tour album! which i removed from the list as i thought it too good to ruin with comedy! hehe

I didn't realize this was a joke thread 'til after I read it. Awesome post! Listening to Sgt. Pepper right now. Man I hate "She's leaving home." Anyway, thanks for the laughs.

No, but they DID bring down communism in Russia.

For real.