Being Photogenic - why are some lucky & others not-so-much?

If my partner takes a picture of me I look totally stupid! In some weird pose or look or there will be some odd thing out of place like my hair! Doesn't he see the part of me that is Gorgeous? What is he looking at when he is using the camera?

When anyone else takes a picture of me it is stunning! When ever I take a picture of him, fabulous! So I blame the cameraman for not having an "eye" for the camera!

I have some very weird crazy thing going on with photos of me in my passport, on the drivers licens and ID card etc - it doesn't look like me at all, with the result that people at airports, banks, renting cars abroad etc, need to look a couple of times extra at my face comparing it with those photos on those cards to be really sure that I am really the person on that ID card, passport etc!

A few have even said, straight out: this is not you! (when in fact, it's really me and my face on the photo)

This is highly annoying but also very funny sometimes! lol!

One time I even refused to pay my photographer at my local photo place, because when I saw the first set of the photos I knew directly that I probably could expect problems further down the line if I ever needed to use them for something important - but the guy was cool and agreed with me and took another set of photos that thankfully turned out to be better photos.

And at the Police station I had recently the same problem when I had photos taken for the new EU identity card with their new automatic photo machine thingy - the police guy looked at his computer screen and said: this is not you on these photos

So he needed to retake 2 new sets with 4 pictures in each before both he and I were satisfied and found the 2 necessary photos for the new EU ID card.

Strange stuff indeed!

Don't shoot me please but you could use a program such
as Photoshop, Paint.net, etc to enhance your photos. You can
change the lighting, soften the photo - just don't go too drastic.

reply to post by Chevalerous


That happens to me also, I've had to argue with shop keepers to sell me the booze because they think I look young in person but my DL and passport pictures are so awful and yucky... I've been accused multiple times of trying to use my non-existent 40 year old sister's IDs.

I don't think very many people take good pictures on those, normally photogenic or not. Can't recall a single ID pic ever that was very attractive. My old one I wore make-up for and turned out looking like a chola. The lighting is always horrible fluorescent makes me look like a zombie, washed out and add 10 years.

On the topic of regular everyday photos, trying to be photogenic... I feel the same way as the OP pretty much. I know I'm pretty to a degree, have been told so (apparently my celeb doppelgänger is Meg White) but I can only take decent pics maybe 2/5 tries. So I sometimes make people take multiple shots and then let me choose the best of the lot.

Other tricks I've used are a bit of make-up contouring, it isn't hard. Learned the basics from my old Kevin Aucoin book. I use bare minerals "warmth" to add slight shading under my chin cos I hate double chin in pictures! And it's good to have defined cheekbones. Powder is essential too for photos, greasy T-zone shine looks bad.

What's also annoying about trying to take nice pictures besides thinking my face look good and then be gross... is thinking my outfit is fantastic when I look in the mirror but then go out, see the pics later on facebook and the clothes are all wrong or I look fat. Alicia Silverstone was right in Clueless when she took polaroids of herself when trying them on, that's one of my new tactics.

WARNING!!

This can be some serious dangerous stuff OP...

There is a condition called BBD (Body dysmorphic disorder) which is considered to have the highest suicide rate of all mental conditions, thats why its serious stuff.

The problem with BBD is that the sufferer cares too much about he looks ending up having a distorted view of himself.

The sufferer may complain of several specific features or a single feature, or a vague feature or general appearance, causing psychological distress that impairs occupational and/or social functioning, sometimes to the point of severe depression and anxiety, development of other anxiety disorders, social withdrawal or complete social isolation, and more.

The disorder generally is diagnosed in those who are extremely critical of their mirror image, physique or self-image, even though there may be no noticeable disfigurement or defect. The three most common areas that those suffering from BDD will feel critical of have to do with the face: the hair, the skin, and the nose. Outside opinion will typically disagree and may protest that there even is a defect. The defect exists in the eyes of the beholder, and one with BDD really does feel as if they see something there that is defective.

BDD is often misunderstood as a vanity-driven obsession, whereas it is quite the opposite; people with BDD do not believe themselves to be better looking than others, but instead feel that their perceived "defect" is irrevocably ugly or not good enough. People with BDD may compulsively look at themselves in the mirror or, conversely, cover up and avoid mirrors. They typically think about their appearance for at least one hour a day (and usually more) and, in severe cases, may drop all social contact and responsibilities as they become a recluse.

Phillips & Menard (2006) found the completed-suicide rate in patients with BDD to be 45 times higher than that of the general United States population. This rate is more than double that of those with clinical depression and three times as high as that of those with bipolar disorder.[11] Suicidal ideation is also found in around 80% of people with BDD.[12] There has also been a suggested link between undiagnosed BDD and a higher-than-average suicide rate among people who have undergone cosmetic surgery

Symptoms

- Common symptoms of BDD include:
- Obsessive thoughts about (a) perceived appearance defect(s).
- Obsessive and compulsive behaviors related to (a) perceived appearance defect(s) (see section below).
- Major depressive disorder symptoms.
- Delusional thoughts and beliefs related to (a) perceived appearance defect(s).
- Social and family withdrawal, social phobia, loneliness and self-imposed social isolation.
- Suicidal ideation.
- Anxiety; possible panic attacks.
- Chronic low self-esteem.
- Feeling self-conscious in social environments; thinking that others notice and mock their perceived defect(s).
- Strong feelings of shame.
- Avoidant personality: avoiding leaving the home, or only leaving the home at certain times, for example, at night.
- Dependent personality: dependence on others, such as a partner, friend or family.
- Inability to work or an inability to focus at work due to preoccupation with appearance.
- Decreased academic performance (problems maintaining grades, problems with school/college attendance).
- Problems initiating and maintaining relationships (both intimate relationships and friendships).
- Alcohol and/or drug abuse (often an attempt to self-medicate).
- Repetitive behavior (such as constantly (and heavily) applying make-up; regularly checking appearance in - mirrors; see section below for more associated behavior).
- Seeing slightly varying image of self upon each instance of observing a mirror or reflective surface.
- Perfectionism (undergoing cosmetic surgery and behaviours such as excessive moisturising and exercising with an aim to create an unattainable but ideal body and reduce anxiety).
- Note: any kind of body modification may change one's appearance. There are many types of body modification that do not include surgery/cosmetic surgery. Body modification (or related behavior) may seem compulsive, repetitive, or focused on one or more areas or features that the individual perceives to be defective.

Source : en.wikipedia.org...

anyone interested in knowing more about my above post please U2U me, I am more than happy to help and give you some tips and suggestions

reply to post by heineken


I have heard of this condition but you have provided
additional information I was not aware of. I had a
friend in another state that I believe had this
condition. This is a serious condition, thanks
so much for the information.

Two things only IMO really....


1. Facial symmetry: Some people have almost perfect facial symmetry. Their left and right side of their face are nearly identical. Culturally this is considered attractive and desirable. This isn't my case. I'm not considered a knock down hunk. But I have been told that I'm not a bad looking man either.... [Which brings us to #2]


2. Self confidence and self perception: I notice and see all my imperfections and have judged my appearance by others standards. Self confidence and a realistic perception of self often corrects this flawed perception of self.

I sometimes see photographs of myself and think that's horrible!!

While someone else would look at it and say hey that's a nice pic.

It is what it is.

reply to post by SLAYER69


Is that you in your avatar?
Or do you look somewhat look
like your avatar?

Do we choose characters that
we think resembles our appearance or
do we choose characters that we wish
we looked like?

The internet has left us with a large
playground for images of ourselves
and others, interesting and I love it.

Originally posted by moogle
reply to post by Chevalerous

 

That happens to me also, I've had to argue with shop keepers to sell me the booze because they think I look young in person

Hehe! that happened to me as well when I was 20 y.o.

A few times I forgot to bring any ID when I went to buy some beer and wine for me and my girlfriend at one very large liquor store near from where we lived at the time - so sometimes I had to return home again empty handed and pick up some ID before I went back to the store again. lol!

I also remember one time when I was 20 and had a big beard - when they even refused to sell me any liquor because I temporarily had this big beard, and the woman in the store said it was impossible to know if it was really me and my face under that beard, when she compared my bearded face with the drivers licence photo

But the strange thing for me is that many of these photos which doesn't look like me are mostly those "official photos" in my passport, ID cards etc.

Photos taken by my friends and in other situations usually turn out to be very good, and one can directly see it's me on those photos - photogenic and all!

So my problem is mainly happening with all those important damn photos for my Identification cards, passport etc - weird eh?

Dito, only when I don't notice somebody is taking a picture of me it might turn out pretty much normal.

Hey...is the same phenomenon as hearing your own voice on recording........that's also pretty terrible.

Peace

reply to post by crazydaisy


Star for you, CrazyDaisy for an interesting point (and for having a fabulous avatar, BTW)! It's cool how avatars give us the chance to display certain selected aspects of ourselves. I always consider a person's avatar to be a telling insight into their personality. On the other hand, aside from wearing makeup, clothing or costumes or having plastic surgery, the real face that we show to the world every day is pretty much "as is."

Another weird & related phenomenon -- have you ever spoken with someone on the phone and when you meet them in person, they are nothing like what you pictured?

reply to post by cassp83


perhaps you need to learn how to pose for a photograph. ever notice children will often force a big silly toothy grin when someone is shooting pics at a family outing? it's because they have not been taught how to ready themselves for the camera.

make sure you have a clean, uncluttered background. solid wall is nice for example. as the photographer prepares the camera, breath in and then relax as you exhale. at the same time you look at a spot on the floor in front of you. slowly raise your head to normal level, bringing your eyes up steadily fixed (not staring maniacally) as you do so.

do not force an unnatural smile, do not try to look like a tough guy (LOL) gangsta rapper. relaxed face, relaxed features. calm, natural and confident is best.

you will present a calm, relaxed face to the camera. practice this, learn how to do it.

also recommend you stop by a Camera Store and purchase a good basic How-To book on taking a good photo-image. It is not difficult. Really good books are available cheap if you go with the large, old Film Manufacturer names: Eastman-Kodak, Agfa-Gevaert, Konica or Fuji.

you may also purchase such books used/cheap on eBay, half.com, Amazon or abebooks.com . Understanding the importance of lighting, balance, symmetry etcetera of photography will make you a better photographer and a better model.

Originally posted by heineken
WARNING!!

This can be some serious dangerous stuff OP...

There is a condition called BBD (Body dysmorphic disorder) which is considered to have the highest suicide rate of all mental conditions, thats why its serious stuff.

The problem with BBD is that the sufferer cares too much about he looks ending up having a distorted view of himself.

The sufferer may complain of several specific features or a single feature, or a vague feature or general appearance, causing psychological distress that impairs occupational and/or social functioning, sometimes to the point of severe depression and anxiety, development of other anxiety disorders, social withdrawal or complete social isolation, and more.

The disorder generally is diagnosed in those who are extremely critical of their mirror image, physique or self-image, even though there may be no noticeable disfigurement or defect. The three most common areas that those suffering from BDD will feel critical of have to do with the face: the hair, the skin, and the nose. Outside opinion will typically disagree and may protest that there even is a defect. The defect exists in the eyes of the beholder, and one with BDD really does feel as if they see something there that is defective.

BDD is often misunderstood as a vanity-driven obsession, whereas it is quite the opposite; people with BDD do not believe themselves to be better looking than others, but instead feel that their perceived "defect" is irrevocably ugly or not good enough. People with BDD may compulsively look at themselves in the mirror or, conversely, cover up and avoid mirrors. They typically think about their appearance for at least one hour a day (and usually more) and, in severe cases, may drop all social contact and responsibilities as they become a recluse.

Phillips & Menard (2006) found the completed-suicide rate in patients with BDD to be 45 times higher than that of the general United States population. This rate is more than double that of those with clinical depression and three times as high as that of those with bipolar disorder.[11] Suicidal ideation is also found in around 80% of people with BDD.[12] There has also been a suggested link between undiagnosed BDD and a higher-than-average suicide rate among people who have undergone cosmetic surgery

Symptoms

- Common symptoms of BDD include:
- Obsessive thoughts about (a) perceived appearance defect(s).
- Obsessive and compulsive behaviors related to (a) perceived appearance defect(s) (see section below).
- Major depressive disorder symptoms.
- Delusional thoughts and beliefs related to (a) perceived appearance defect(s).
- Social and family withdrawal, social phobia, loneliness and self-imposed social isolation.
- Suicidal ideation.
- Anxiety; possible panic attacks.
- Chronic low self-esteem.
- Feeling self-conscious in social environments; thinking that others notice and mock their perceived defect(s).
- Strong feelings of shame.
- Avoidant personality: avoiding leaving the home, or only leaving the home at certain times, for example, at night.
- Dependent personality: dependence on others, such as a partner, friend or family.
- Inability to work or an inability to focus at work due to preoccupation with appearance.
- Decreased academic performance (problems maintaining grades, problems with school/college attendance).
- Problems initiating and maintaining relationships (both intimate relationships and friendships).
- Alcohol and/or drug abuse (often an attempt to self-medicate).
- Repetitive behavior (such as constantly (and heavily) applying make-up; regularly checking appearance in - mirrors; see section below for more associated behavior).
- Seeing slightly varying image of self upon each instance of observing a mirror or reflective surface.
- Perfectionism (undergoing cosmetic surgery and behaviours such as excessive moisturising and exercising with an aim to create an unattainable but ideal body and reduce anxiety).
- Note: any kind of body modification may change one's appearance. There are many types of body modification that do not include surgery/cosmetic surgery. Body modification (or related behavior) may seem compulsive, repetitive, or focused on one or more areas or features that the individual perceives to be defective.

Source : en.wikipedia.org...

Thank you for the concern. But, I'm fairly confident that I'm just horrid in photos. Even my husband & sister say it's like I smile......and then make a stupid face as soon as the camera goes off.

Blah. I will learn to live with it I suppose.

reply to post by graceunderpressure


Yes I have talked to people on the phone and when I meet them I am surprised.
They don't seem to match up in appearance with the way they sound. It is
a little strange somehow.

I believe just about everyone who has ever had a picture taken of themselves has (or had) this problem. I use to have it bad. Not so much anymore. I began having photo sessions with me as the photographer. During each session, I will take up to 50 pictures. It was not a vanity thing. I was just trying out many different poses, angles, lighting, makeup and hair styles, backgrounds and even probs to see what worked best. I have become pretty good at it because now I can be pretty satisfied with the majority of pictures taken. My mom makes fun of me sometimes over the crazy amount of pictures I take of myself, but again, it's not because I think I am so hot that I'd be depriving the world of my beauty, it is so I can be more comfortable with what I got. I have quite a few pics I am proud of and want to hang on the walls, but I don't because people may REALLY think I am vain.


Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

Oh and here are some of tricks I use. May have already heard of these, but here ya go: When it is a full body pose I always angle half of my body away from the camera. Not dramatically though. The leg closest to the camera I always bend the knee slightly. You'll see a lot of celebs use this pose on redcarpets. This gives your body a slimming look. For my arms I usually put my hands on my hips in a relaxed manner. To avoid a double chin, I ever so slightly tilt my head back and chin upwards and press my tounge up against the roof of my mouth. Roll your shoulders back some. I also never hold the camera at a low angle that requires me to look down or lean over. Hardly anyone looks good at an upward angle.


Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

sorry, don't have that problem.

i get better looking every day.

just ask my majic mirror.



but yeah, i ain't no prize ham but don't take a bad pic. (i do some film work and tv, etc. and i am my worst critic)

you hear things like "the camera loves him/her" i believe it.

i've met some beauties that have terrible pics and i don't mean badly done. the cam just doesn't get the real thing.



and vice versa, a tabloid long shot can be better than that persons studio glam shoot.


when you get the answer to that, let me know. we can make millions!

I am the same way. I don't see shadows and such on the mirror, but in pics my eyes look hollow and sunken, laugh lines seem more pronounced and of course I would usually have to look drunk or something.

But yes, I have always wondered why some people never take a bad pic and some rarely get a good one.


Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

There have been suggestions posted so far which highlight the importance of posing, lighting and all sorts of good stuff on how to get a nice shot but no one so far has covered the fundamental error most people make and that’s the dreaded arm length self shot portrait.

It is important to know that your standard point and shoot camera has a slightly wide angle lens to allow you to get ‘just that little bit more’ in to your shots, unfortunately this wide angle lens (if you go back and check) distorts the image at the top and bottom and more so at the left and right of the image. Therefore your positioning of the camera is critical otherwise you’ll get a slightly wider face or elongated chin/ forehead. This added to the forced smile of camera terror will produce the expected result of horrible portraits.

Decent portrait shots are generally shot with 100mm or larger lenses as they reproduce a more accurate representation of what the human eye sees.

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