Attraction, Repulsion or Nothing at all? The person behind the machine!

I happened to miss-click on an social network search the other day and up came a 'strange' face. Blurry, nothing much to look at, his profile was sketchy and he’d have to be my ‘friend’ to learn more but what the heck! I sent him a message.

He wrote back and parks began to fly. Not even past our second correspondence and I found myself looking forward to hearing from him, thought about him through the day and made a note to share with him this thing or that I experienced. What was he writing me before I even had a chance to? He wrote: ‘I’ve been thinking of you.’ ’I wanted to share this with you.’ ‘Isn’t this great.’

There was a connection. A click. From word go.

Now let’s focus on another scenario.

- Here on ATS a friend reminded me of so-and-so’s birthday. Well, he is a ‘so-and-so’ I thought with a sneer and begrudgingly sent him a note of felicitations. No ‘click’ there on any level.

- In another genre all together? I got some info I'd asked for from someone who I know but honestly - I wouldn’t miss if they dropped off into the etherworld. I’ll get back to them tomorrow. Maybe.

Summed up? I’ve never met any of them, I correspondence with all three via the computer - but my ‘reaction’ to each is as diverse as night and day.

So my question is this.

What's the Spark! That instant connection between people who’ve never met, never shared a voice conversation, and don’t know, well, even how the other person smells! Nope, can’t blame this one of pheromones folks!

So, if we can’t point to pheromones or some other equally elusive but powerful driving force that brings people together then tell me? WHAT IS IT? Because regardless the connection IS there!

What’s your explanation?

Could it be past life memories? Soul groups? Or just something - WONDERFUL - we can’t even put our finger on yet?

I’m looking forward to hearing your stories, and your explanations!

peace

reply to post by silo13


Honestly, I think when you meet someone over the internet and you "connect" with them you are not exactly connecting with the person as much as you are connecting with the impression you have of that person in your mind.

The first impression, and the encounters after, determine how you imagine the person. If you don't know much about the person (how they smell, look, or act in certain situations) your mind is forced to fill in the blanks, and sometimes you imagine the person being perfect and attractive, and you become attracted to your mental image of that person. Or sometimes you imagine the person being imperfect and unattractive. It all depends on the first impression and your imagination.

The same thing happens with fictional characters in a book. While reading about a character in a book your imagination builds how you think the character would look and act in real life. Unless the book describes certain details, your imagination will fill in the blanks. No two people will imagine the same character, however the more detail the book contains of that character the more similar the imaginations will be. Some people will like the character and some people will hate the character all because of their mental impression of that character.


For example, I am going to describe someone, and you can try to imagine them;

The person is tall. The person has short hair. The person has an athletic build. The person is smart. The person has light skin. The person has a funny laugh. The person is humble.

Now tell me, what color hair did you imagine the person had? What is male or female? Were they ugly or attractive? Since I didn't describe certain details your mind had to create a temporary answer to those questions. The less I describe the greater your imagination takes over, the more I describe the less your imagination takes over. If you "connect" or not to this person depends on how you imagine that person to be.

Do I make sense?

reply to post by gift0fpr0phecy


Sure, you make great sense and thanks for replying.

I still go back to the 'spark' though. And it is more than impression. And why with one and not the other.

Anyway, it's tough to explain unless you've experienced it, maybe that's the problem...

peace

one day, a guy i've met by "coincidence" said to me "souls are like trees. You were born as an acacia tree, in an acacia wood, so it's obvious that another acacias are close to you"
I think this is true, at least for real meetings.... i dunno about online ones, but i've met some people (some of them right here in ATS) that seems very "acacian" to me, if you know what i mean...

i believe its a thing that happens to us sensitive folk often on line.
it can be frustrating when you "click" w/ someone 100s of miles away though
-peace out
john

reply to post by jplaysguitar

physic ability sorta thing i ment

reply to post by jplaysguitar

i believe its a thing that happens to us sensitive folk often on line.

You know I'm beginning to think you're right. I've brought this up to a few people - off the computer - in face to face conversations and they say they've never experienced such a thing - a 'spark' - even when they're met hundreds of people online.

Wow... Maybe you've hit on something! Maybe it isn't something 'everyone' feels? OR even can...

peace

I think its better that we don't "know" what it is, as knowledge seems to detract from experience.

You never get that 'spark' unless that person has something worthwhile to share with you. You never connect with someone and then find out later that that guy was actually boring, or wasted your time, or that it was not meaningful in someway.

That spark i believe is the the synchronicity which slowly leads everyone first to awakening then enlightenment. It is the same spark which leads to all opportunities to become the person you were meant to be...

I think that in some ways, you can see into a person's personality more online. But unless you meet face to face, you really can't know the person. I personally have never done this, but I think when people "flirt"online, they have an image or a fantasy of this other person, which can be impossible to live up to in real life....because naturally, on a dating site, people will put their best face forward, and "forget" to share certain other things. I would say that if you meet someone online, and you are interested, it's best to meet asap, and always with a friend the first time. It's a shady E world, and you have to be sure that the person you "fall for" is REALLY the person you think they are.