Men and Child support. What is the answer?

reply to post by CobraCommander


Because it is offsetting the economy and its hard to find work.

Originally posted by thehoneycomb
If your not understanding my humor then I will explain.

I have been fired many times. In most cases I do not blame my employer I blame myself.

This the "United States" is capitalist and any employer has the right to fire me at any time for any reason!

I have been fired a few times. Only once with legit reason. Last job I got fired from was under a cloud of suspicion after the store came up short on an audit. I was made to take the fall because I forgot to pay for a damn hotdog. A hotdog! Nevermind the fact that I forgot to pay because I was eating behind the counter and the company violates state law by not giving lunch breaks.

But the truth was, it was the manager who was stealing. He was the only person who could fence paper products and pet food, through his brother-in-law who owned a deli.

Originally posted by sonnny1
reply to post by CobraCommander

 

WTF!!

I am saddened for your loss brother. Condolences. My EX shacked up with a loser also. He repeatedly beat my son,forcing his younger sister to watch. Ripping my sons shirt off his body,to subjecting him to 110 degrees in a closed room,with no air. Blood drawn daily.Theres much more,but I cringe thinking about it. Then,my daughter. GRRRRRR.

Nonetheless,There isnt a day I dont think about it,especially when I look into my kids eyes. All legal of course,because my EX decided to move far away. With no money left,and barely enough to survive,I waited. All the time not knowing if MY kids were alive or dead. But the child support check ,kept on flowing........for the drugs. These ASSH0les make me sick. They deserve hell.

Hats off to you sir.

The foster-daughter that I lost, really broke me. I really thought I would be her Dad for life. And I sort of put my eggs in that basket so to speak after my biological baby girl was killed in a car wreck.

reply to post by CobraCommander


Job creation is boring, but if you are an up and coming entrepreneur you need any advantage you can get. That includes hiring and firing people, regardless of reasons, you might fire somebody cause they are creepy or they just cant perform their job and there is nothing wrong with that. As a business owner you would probably expect to run your own business and not let others run it for you.

Originally posted by thehoneycomb
reply to post by CobraCommander

 

You should try getting donations from poor people like me.

I would be happy to donate!

We have been working hard, but sadly, as you point out, our biggest supporters have the least they can give. No shame on them, just the way it is. I will say this though, $50 from someone who can't afford it is more touching than $5,000 from some company who only gives begrudgingly to avoid bad press.

Originally posted by bluemirage5
reply to post by CobraCommander

 

Ok so now we have agreed what man and women are quite capable of doing......what is your point?

What is your point? You're the hypocrite in this thread, not me. The rest of us here have been arguing for true equality all along.

reply to post by lifeform11



A more realistic and fairer approach is if both parents had shared custody where they have their child 6 months of the year each. It works for afew who are well organised, however, they have good communication skills and have private agreements between them that work well for both parents and their children. No child support changes hands where there is a 50/50 custody agreement.

The Family Court system automatically starts from 50/50 share basis however a majority of fathers refuse the opportunity and/or there are litigating circumstances or there has been Police involvement. Thats how it is in the UK and all Commonwealth nations.

Originally posted by thehoneycomb
reply to post by lifeform11

 

The system has no way of judging. But honestly that sounds better then here, if a woman wants 99% custody she could probably get it, regardless of what the fathers circumstances are.

well i am not sure about there. but it is the same where custody is concerned here, the women is going to get 100% custody, however that does not prevent you being able to look after them for 2/3 days a week in the u.k. so that you are contributing. unless the mother refuses it.

she will only refuse it usually for two reasons, one the father can not look after themselves let alone a child, they have no sense of what being a father is, or two the mother wants to take the father for everything they have and make their life a misery therefore puts a block on it to punish them in some way due to holding a grudge.

in both cases the system is not to blame, the parents are.

reply to post by CobraCommander


Show me and if I like what I see I will and I cant do much today, but that could change any day. But me personally have been through it and I know that there is nowhere to go unless you have friends.

Originally posted by bluemirage5
reply to post by thehoneycomb

 

If I recall, and I'll double check my sources to be absolutely sure, but 3 male shelters opened up in Australia some time ago........they shut down......not because of lack of funding at all......but because they were always empty. It would be a challenge to see afew open up in the USA and see if they get the some response. Don't you think?

In my county, especially during cold weather months, our shelters are filled well beyond capacity and food banks run dry. If men who were in standard shelters sent their overflow of men who were DV victims, it would ease local poverty conditions in general, helping the entire community, not just the men themselves.

reply to post by CobraCommander


No, you have'nt been fighting for true equality at all. A majority of you men don't want equality. You just want your wallets and all the matrimonial assets intact. Most fathers can not have shared custody because either they refuse it, it does'nt work around their hours of of employment, there are litigating circumstances which may have included Police involvement.

Originally posted by thehoneycomb
reply to post by CobraCommander

 

Thats any place in america. So I guess I do not know your background, but I do know that you are doing something to change it, so how do we change it? I suggest that the thing we are fighting against is an idea, just like the United States was an idea or Child Support was an idea, so how do you fight against an idea? The cards are stacked against us and we know this, but we also know there are only 52 cards in a deck 54 if you count the joker which describes this place in time so there is a variable but obviously we have different ideas but a common place in which these ideas spawned, so how do we proceed?

We should start by addressing issues instead of jumping in political bandwagons I think. Most people will agree, that when they vote, it usually comes down to the one or two MOST important issues to them, and their candidate never delivers anyway. And usually too, that candidate that I voted for, winds up implementing some policy that EVERYONE, across the board is actually against.

Originally posted by sonnny1

Originally posted by laiguana
I think the best solution is that the child be taken away from both parents. Both parents should be sterilized and fined, if they fail they should be incarcerated. The child will be raised by foster care and will later serve in the armed forces. It's the only solution actually...

People need to start thinking about the consequences and our system as it is now doesn't allow it.

Brilliant!!!!

PolPot,Adolf Hitler,and a few Communist Leaders would agree wholeheartedly.......

Say what you will...Custody disputes are a by product of reckless breeding. People need to learn...and people learn best the hard way. At least their children will come out better than them. Without consequences people will never learn.

reply to post by lifeform11


The parents are not to blame, this is not the minority report, the government is not psychic and in the US the woman always gets custody the 2/3 rule in america means that if you haver your kid over 93 days (which is nearly impossible with current system) that the father may have a reduced child support obligation. It does not guarantee nor promote the father any access to the child, rather it discourages it.

So yeah dads have it better in the UK but that doesnt mean your situation is any better and the government cant manage itself, why would you want then to raise your child?

Originally posted by bluemirage5
reply to post by CobraCommander

 

Oh I see, so you think there is no necessity for women's shelters and they only exist because it looks good politically?

More assumptions? I said that was the only reason people donate, I didn't say they weren't necessary.

reply to post by CobraCommander


Thats because in life their is a balance, havent you seen the yin and yang? ancient concept yet true today.

reply to post by lifeform11


The UK system is quite a bit different. It wasn't long ago that in the UK, a man did not have to pay support at all if he was never married to the mother.

here is a better explaination for u.k. parents. wrong link bare with me.

correct link.

www.csa.gov.uk...


i feel for american father it sounds a lot worse than here in the u.k.

but what parents here in the u.k. need to understand is that it does not have to mean one parent is drained financially, both parents need to grow up and plan what is best for the child and drop all the grudge stuff, a homeless father does not benefit the child. and vice versa.

Originally posted by thehoneycomb
reply to post by bluemirage5

 

Why would there be a shelter exclusively for women? If it is a shelter, it should be accessible by anyone who needs shelter, not just women.

I actually do see a need for segregated facilities, especially in cases of severe trauma. But I do see your point nonetheless. And I also think it has something to do with the design of the shelter too. DV shelter or not, I can see a certain need for segregation if all you have is bunks available. Some homeless shelters around here are auditorium cots, and that is no good for anyone really.

But if you have something like a converted motel say, no need for segregation when everyone has their own room, or only two men are sharing a room, two woman, a woman with kids, etc.

But try this on for size. If a family, a man with woman and kids comes to a shelter, they will be denied in almost all cases. The woman MUST ditch the man to get a place to stay in a subsidized facility.

reply to post by CobraCommander


So you do have shelters of some kind.

You said in another post and I'm quoting you here.....we should start addressing the issues instead of jumping on the political bandwagon. Wrong. Thats exactly how you get things rolling.....you get on the political bandwagon just as women did.

Action speaks louder than afew drop kick words on a public forum. Roll your sleeves up matey, get a minimum of a million non-custodial fathers on board and start writing letters. Grow some b*lls and show us all some action.