"The ice cream is still cold, it's not him."

Apparently I fit the description of a local car jacker. As I was walking home from the grocery store just now (1:30 am Tuesday morning) I found myself surrounded by a combination of no less than 6 police and sheriff cars, lights and sirens ablaze. They scared the living s out of me, which I expressed by telling them that they scared the living s out of me; shined all their lights in my face, put me on the ground and frisked me. All the while I was politely asking them to tell me what I did wrong. They eventually told me I fit the the description mentioned, and then told me I was seen walking from the direction of the Goodwill store (which I wasn't, I came from the exact opposite side of the street), and would be detained while they searched me. I literally had grocery bags overflowing from my backpack, I couldn't even close it. They asked me what I was doing. For the second time in a month, I had to tell the police I was in the middle of writing an English paper on social injustice. (had a similar experience while walking home from the same store.) While the cops were ID'ing me, one of them was going through my groceries when she pulled out the Ben and Jerry's Half Baked ice cream. After a thorough examination of my ice cream and the the receipt from the store, she proudly proclaimed (I couldn't make this up) "The ice cream is still cold, it's not him." I am no longer sleepy. Back to my English paper..

Moral: Ice cream is both delicious and a great alibi. No conspiracy, no brutality, no charges filed, no harm done. But they really did scare the s out of me, and waste my time! Why do the cops keep messing with me?

Quickly, Change your hairstyle and your shopping habits.
oh, and Cherry Garcia is wayyyyy better.

Great story! I had an experience several years ago with the cops, and a possible vehicle theft. Except I reported the stolen vehicle. I had sold a man a Jeep on payments, and told him if he missed a payment the truck went on the PD's stolen vehicle list immediately. We'll he thought I was bluffing. He had a bud in the PD that told him the big blue Jeep he was driving was on the hit list, and promptly returned it to me. We'll being the ADD person I am I forgot to call, and have it taken off the list. Fast forward 9 months, and I'm returning from the shooting range in the same Jeep with a veritable arsenal in the back, and enough ammo in the console, and glove box to repel the Chinese army for a day. After several very erm...tense moments, they ID'd me, and realised I was the same person that filed the report, and I told them the whole story, and they let me go. The rookie with the shift supervisor asked why they were letting me leave with all those weapons, and I'll never forget what he said: "It isn't the guy with 15 pieces of high dollar iron in plain sight you worry about. It's the guy with 1 $20 midnight special hidden in the glove box you worry about." WHEW!!! Thank God I got a cop with common sense that day.

reply to post by ZeroReady


COP 1: "What's this...Hmmm Ben and Jerry's 'Half Baked' Ice Cream" COP 2: "Half Baked huh?....sounds like a drug reference.....are you some sort of Drugged up Hippy??? YOU: "whaaa....it's just ice cream man...from the grocery store" COP 2: "Hey SHUT UP...I'm not talking to you HIPPY!" YOU: "but you asked me a que..." COP 1: "He Said SHUT UP! ....whats the matter with ya....you so stoned your ears don't work?! YOU:what does that even mean? COP 2 "I'm Getting Out My Taser Partner! sounds like this PUNK wants to resist arrest!!!!" YOU: I'm just lying here handcuffed... COP 1: Damn your sexy when you threaten to Tase somebody...... COP 2 "Oh Yeah....You Think so huh?.....Both Cops: MMMMmmmmmphhh YOU: Dear God....are you guys making out on top of me?!?! Cop 1: Oh yeah...sorry 'bout that...go ahead and uncuff him...he's clean...we can use these cuffs ourselves *wink*
YOU: "yeah...OK...I'm just gonna go on home then.......yeah......uh, going on home.... definitely not looking behind me..........ewwww"

reply to post by bhornbuckle75


Yup that's actually closer to how it went down, but I didn't think anyone would believe it.

I've been stopped while out doing my daily walk a few times. One time they just questioned me from their car

"What are you doing out here?"

"Uhhh, walking?"

"Do you live around here?"

"Yeah, right over on xx"

"Oh ok" Drives off.

Another time I was frisked, told to sit on the curb while the officer was fooling around in his car, and was told "If you try and run I'll shoot you"

Which, by the way, was the second time I have been told "if you run I will shoot you" are they training cops in my area to say that or something?

Just unacceptable. Sorry you had to get hassled. Could have turned out worse though.