The Rapture Report-Live testimonials from around the world, 26 minutes to go.

Originally posted by VexedSoul
I've got beer, a pot noodle, a half deflated balloon, 'The end of the world as we know it' playing and a few valium... thats my end of the world party sorted!..

To be honest I'll be pretty pissed off if I get raptured...

LOLOLOLOLOL

* zAZZbot YAWNS AND streaches awake, peers out the window, and SEES RIVERS OF HOT MAGMA

I thought we was already in hell.

reply to post by Swizzy


Right, but you didn't KNOW it wouldn't. The people making claims that the rapture won't happen are just as wrong as the ones making the claims that it will happen. Anything is possible at any time.

The rapture started in oregon already, Starbucks was out of sweetner for the iced coffe...the end is near

reply to post by MJZoo


Thinking like that is just wasting ones time with constant fear. Why even bother getting up if you could trip and break your neck. Theres a good reason to have fear in certain situations but this is ridiculous.

I hear they spotted Jesus down at the local mall, signing autographs and posing for pictures. He couldn't stay long, though, had to be in Samoa in an hour. That man is punctual!

Too bad, I wanted to get a pic with the big guy

reply to post by Swizzy


That's my point. I won't be staying up till midnight to see what happens around the world.

reply to post by VariableConstant


Yea, Lucifer was just at the chevron on 23rd pumping gas and giving out cupons for disaster kits at wallmart...

reply to post by The4thLegacy


LMAO

I wonder how many "believers" will jump in air when the Rapture happens? It'd be like the biblical equivalent to waving at someone who is waving at you, only to turn around and see the actual person they were communicating with.
Awkward...

ETA: I slipped a priest a fifty last week to put a good word in. Is that money gone if nothing happens?

Originally posted by VariableConstant
I hear they spotted Jesus down at the local mall, signing autographs and posing for pictures. He couldn't stay long, though, had to be in Samoa in an hour. That man is punctual!

Too bad, I wanted to get a pic with the big guy

Yes, I'm quite punctual, sorry about the pic, maybe next time.

My Samoan people always make me feel so good about myself when I look at our photos afterward.

And by the way, I've lost weight you know! What's that "big guy" crack about? (You know I'm sensitive...)

reply to post by JR MacBeth


LMAO!

Originally posted by xFiDgetx

Originally posted by BrokenCircles
I haven't had the time, during the last couple of days, to look at the weather forecast. I've been busy packing up for a weekend road trip. Does anyone know if they have changed the weekend forecast? Or are they still calling for pretty much the same?

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/0baec39c4a7b.jpg[/atsimg]

Winner.

Seriously, that was funny.

How can I get one that has my city on it.....where did you find that??? Thanks!

Zazzy you crack me up mate.

Glad your keeping on top of it all for the rest of us lazy folks who missed the sunrise.

Everyone stay safe out there....


Good Luck

I plan on being hungover tomorrow, so if the rapture is loud i'm gonna be super pissed!
2nd

reply to post by xFiDgetx


That's pretty funny, but this is still my fave...

I'm surprised none of you heathens have posted this yet

reply to post by Mactire


HAHA yeah I loled hard at that one

Nice

in 10hrs i find out if my family members vacationing on the other side of the globe get eaten up by these reported raptors.

S&F