What is your menu to ET?

Hey folks
Felt the need for a lighter (or profoundly more important..depending on your viewpoint) thread..something to get off birth certificates for a few minutes.

I got this inspiration from a thread Here
a story about a person meeting an alien whom then cooked said person some pancakes. Amusing, but also thought provoking (often the breaking of bread is considered a sign of peace and friendship in many cultures)

So, here is the senario

An alien species lands in your backyard. Lets say it is a unknown type...looks a bit like us, but different, whatever..enough to know that you haven't read about em before.

For some magical reason, you know they could use a bite to eat...they have never been on this planet before, this is the first encounter with anything human.

You have the opportunity to give them their first thing...be it a taste of something, a drink, some food...what would you give them that is the symbol of earth? Their first experience and impression of earth...
dead animals? sex organs of plants? embryos? Cattle Lactation?

===

Personally, I would give them a coke and perhaps some fish and rice. historical, cultural, and fixation all fit into one. Pretty sure that wouldn't cause a interstellar war (lets hope they aren't evolved fish)

reply to post by SaturnFX


here is my question to ET.


hey alien thing ....how do magnets work?


errr...my bad....i misread that as message not menu. whoops...carry on.

Originally posted by optimus primal
reply to post by SaturnFX

 

here is my question to ET.


hey alien thing ....how do magnets work?


errr...my bad....i misread that as message not menu. whoops...carry on.

edit on 28-4-2011 by optimus primal because: (no reason given)

It was message, heh. changed it

however, they may enjoy eating magnets....

I think I would pull an Obama and try to get them to drink a beer with me, assuming they even can.

Seriously, a UFO already landed right in front of you and freaking aliens just came out, why not?

As for what I would ask them? I don't think I could stop at just one question, they would have to leave or shut me up.

HA! Maybe I could get them to log on to ATS?

reply to post by SaturnFX


I would tell them stories and lie to them about everything our government lies to us about. A big old plate of hypothetical crap. I would make sure they had a birth certificate though, just to verify they are real and post it online. After it was debunked, I would pay someone millions to research it more because it is so important.

I would serve some lasange with some good bread
And a big glass of whole Milk

They get a bit of everything that way, and its my favorit food aswell

bon appetit

The first thing I would do is hide my cat, I think they like them. lol

You would need a lot of information before you could feed them. Who knows if their bodies could handle Processed foods, Hydrogenated oils, and High fructose corn syrup.

You usually can't go wrong, in any situation, by serving up some nice cheesy Mac & Cheese, Pizza, and a choice of soft drinks and fresh orange juice.

As a symbol of earth, I would let them listen to some Springsteen (can't go wrong their), and them watch some good flicks on the HiFi that epitomize humanity.

Welks with lashings of vinegar. Hmmmm

Me personally, I would want them to experience American culture firsthand. Really let them see how we live in this country.

We are going to swing through the local McDonald's, then zip on over to Wal-Mart for some fine Chinese crafted products, take a jaunt over to Starbuck's for a frothy beverage, then on the way home almost total their ship because I have taught them the joys of texting and drinking said Starbuck's all while steering with your knee, and finally, we would arrive home just in time to settle in for Dancing With the Stars.

I personally can't stand any of the above mentioned products, establishments, or shows. But hey, I want them to see how we roll here in the good ol' U.S. of A.

Off topic: Do you think somewhere, in a galaxy far far away, ETs post on a forum about how their government is lying to them about the existence of humans?

i'm pretty sure i would have to say coke, yes... followed by pizza! i agree, fish and rice are very well known in every culture, but i'm pretty sure (at least i would say) that pizza comes a pretty close 2nd! if not oh well, i love pizza so that's what i'd like to share with them...
... or i have recently found an amazing recipe for chicken curry, very light, tangy, mildly spicy and oh so awesome... so yeah, either pizza or the chicken curry recipe!
and maybe a handful of salt and pepper pistachios, or some honey from my parents beehives on a good old buttermilk biscuit, or some cousin willie's movie theater butter popcorn... okay, sorry, maybe i'm just hungry!

Actually, perhaps just some bread and water may be the best bet...too many unknowns, such as allergys, if they would find it offensive to eat animals, etc.

would still offer them a coke though, it has both the perfect joy of advancing out food source with the scientific process of yumification, mixed with the gluttony and unhealthy excess we as a race tend to push forward as our norm.

Whose going to be the first to smoke a joint with them?

I'm sure it would make the food better.

Originally posted by SaturnFX
Actually, perhaps just some bread and water may be the best bet...too many unknowns, such as allergys, if they would find it offensive to eat animals, etc.

would still offer them a coke though, it has both the perfect joy of advancing out food source with the scientific process of yumification, mixed with the gluttony and unhealthy excess we as a race tend to push forward as our norm.

No bread, bread is Yeast, (Yeasts are micro-organisms) And our water if full of fluoride and antibiotics..

Originally posted by RSF77
Whose going to be the first to smoke a joint with them?

I'm sure it would make the food better.

edit on 28-4-2011 by RSF77 because: (no reason given)

I don't think we need stoner talk on their reports back to homeworld about this planet...

"on Enigma 48 planet, we were given burning plants to inhale, then they made the universe exist in my head, then we watched animated figures passing gas and this was amusing. Then time both stopped and sped forward.
Final analysis: Destroy the planet for violating physics"

Originally posted by Tygart

No bread, bread is Yeast, (Yeasts are micro-organisms)

Fair enough, but I think you just ruined bread for me also...thanks alot, jerk!

I would probably give them fruit. Whole, raw fruit. I think they would be totally fascinated by such a food. Being space-fairing creatures, it's probably been a long time since they've had something grow directing from the soil of a planet using the solar rays of a star, if that makes any sense.

I would also like to give them something else but I don't want any mod trouble. *cough*

reply to post by SaturnFX


Maybe they will be impressed at the outrageously good chicken nuggets and cherry soda, followed up with the most delicious brownies they have ever tasted, and our species will be employed as interstellar chefs.

I would offer them some home made salsa,over some chicken fajitas,desery would be followed by some herbal brownies...lol

Originally posted by SaturnFX

Originally posted by Tygart

No bread, bread is Yeast, (Yeasts are micro-organisms)

Fair enough, but I think you just ruined bread for me also...thanks alot, jerk!

Pass on the yogurt too. lol:

Good thread, the more I think about it, I don't see how and alien could handle our current environment. :