This is one of my favorite topics to talk about, and yet so few opportunities to do so.
In 2005 I had some interesting time slip experiences that completely changed my perception of reality. I had recently moved back to my home state and
wasn't back to work yet, so I had a lot of free time on my hand. It was a beautiful sunny, warm day. I went to lay down for an afternoon nap (just
because I could
I woke up a little bit later, and it looked like it had become cloudy and darker outside. I walked into the living room and stopped cold. Everything
"seemed" ok....except there was a playpen in the middle of my living room. And my computer monitor was on and had a "My Little Pony" wallpaper
background on it. Nobody else was home at the time. But....at the time I had a 10 year old son, and was single. It was just us living there. Where
did the playpen come from? I was thinking maybe I had put the "My Little Pony" wallpaper up as a joke on my son.
But, it was starting to sink in that where ever I was at the moment...my son had never been born. I started to look around, trying to keep the panic
in...but the tears were already started to well up. In this new place I had a baby girl, and was married. I ran into the kitchen and there were
pictures all over the refrigerator. I wanted to see a picture of who I had married and I "knew" one was on the fridge. I was looking at a balding
man with a beer belly, and he had a large family. I started quizing myself....why was everything different?
Choices...I had made different choices in this life. What choices had caused this? I was frantically scanning memories that were mine, but not mine.
I was still able to see both timelines and keep it clear which was which. In this new life, I had decided to not marry my son's father and
therefore never had my son. This couldn't be really happening. I refused to let it actually sink in. What was I doing right before this? I had
been sleeping. I'm dreaming. That's it. I just need to wake up. How do I do that? I started pinching my arms, and I mean I was seriously trying
to hurt myself. And it hurt like a mofo. And I wasn't waking up.
At this point, I started to officially freak out. I had to get out of there, so I went to the front door and opened it. While I was in the same
apartment building, instead of being on the 3rd floor in one building, I was on the bottom floor in the building next to it. I was seriously starting
to feel my sanity slip.
My son. I'm stuck here. I don't know how to get back to my son. I've lost him. How do I explain to the people here that I'm mourning a child
that never existed as far as they know. OMG, is this why there are crazy people? Is this what happens to them? Nobody is ever, EVER going to
believe me. I don't know any of the people here, nobody to confide in. How am I going to move forward while remembering a completely different
life? And why? Why did it happen? And if this sort of thing happens, then why be cruel and let me remember my old life. Did the person who was
living this life go to my life and is now mourning her daughter and husband.
I was totally bawling at this point. I couldn't think of one place or person to go to for help. Is there some secret hotline that I can call to let
the universe know that a mistake was made? I felt so totally and completely helpless. I closed my eyes and crumpled to the ground crying.
I don't remember feeling anything changing. Except I was reset to right after I woke up from my nap and I was heading towards the living room. I
bolted towards it and it was sunny again and no playpen or "My Little Pony". I'd never been so happy to be standing in my living room in my whole