Join the Church of Carlin today. I am starting a new religion. I believe in the prophet George Carli

Originally posted by g146541
Being the pope, will you have a popemobile as well?
If so will it have that open spot on top?
Will you be cruising around any tall buildings?
Thank you in advance.

Excellent. Excellent.

Now the hint of an assassination plot.
Hell with a popemoblile. I'm gonna get a pimpmobile.

Originally posted by Robin Marks

Originally posted by DevilJin
Ha - to all the atheists who think religion will die out or the world will be better without it. This is proof people are willing to MAKE a religion out of anything. What's ironic is that Carlin was an atheist and the OP wants a religion in honor of him.

"Facepalm from beyond the grave!!!"

First point. Carlin never said he was an atheist. He wouldn't even let himself be called agnostic. You are wrong. I am Pope. I am the only one knows everything the prophet meant.

Secondly. More negative comments please. I need all the persecuction I can get. No self-respecting religion can get famous unless there's an injustice meeted out by the intolerant old religion followers.

Let's see. So far I've been called a drug addict and I've been called stupid. I've also been told that The Prophet is rolling over in his grave with the idea that I would start a religion in his name. Carlin speaks through me, I am the Pople, so as the devil always says on his Fox show, he also goes by William or Bill, SHUT UP!!! JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN!!!!

I'll tell you right now that I'm not really into the whole martyrdom thing. And I'm not always that peaceful. I'll give up my time, but I ain't getting hung up on a cross. You've got me mistaken for the old messiah Brian.

Now go away.
Leave me alone.
I'm not your saviour.

www.youtube.com...

You have serious mental problems or maybe you're trolling. Not only are you delusional but this entire thread is an insult to Carlin and ATS' motto "deny ignorance" which you basking in.

You're right about Carlin not being an atheist, which I will admit I was wrong. The rest of your comment is just pointless, but whatever. You are doing Carlin's message a disservice by creating a religion, something he disliked and was against. You glorifying Carlin is more of a step back than a step forward evolution but idiots will be idiots.

Hope you don't claim to see Carlin's face in your grilled cheese sandwich.

And for a "pope", you're sure a childish one who can't take criticism.

see this was exactly what they did to jesus, built a whole parade show around him, making people worship him and totally forget the guy's actual message..

i havent forgot george carlin's message.

OP, this would be the last thing he would have wanted in his name.



Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

Here's a decree.

Joe Pesci is a patron saint of the Church of Carlin.

He can't be God.
He's too short.

reply to post by Robin Marks


NO NO NO!! Your Excellency.
To ummmm shower you with flowers...
Fresh air is very important!

reply to post by DevilJin


You said, "You have serious mental problems or maybe you're trolling."

Yes I do. How kind of you to notice. I have so many the doctors are running out of new ones to diagnose me with. Thank God that little nugget was brought up now in the begining. There should be no misunderstandings in my church. I mean in Carlin's church. I am mentally ill.

So now everyone can take everything I say and dismiss it. Because we all know that people with mental illnesses need to be ignore because nothing they say is of any value. Please, please, more. I love the persecution. The mentally ill are all instant members. They don't have to swear an oath. The rest of you do.

So mentally ill people have no right to speak because they are out of touch with reality.
Well, I would have to disagree. In The Church of Carlin, the mentally ill are considered shamans.

They are blessed without prejudice.

I gave you a S&F just from the title.

Then I read that you want to be the pope. Now I want to take back the S&F because I don't want any priests playing with the altar boys.

I will, however, allow you to be the Poop if you like.

Originally posted by notsofunnyguy
I gave you a S&F just from the title.

Then I read that you want to be the pope. Now I want to take back the S&F because I don't want any priests playing with the altar boys.

I will, however, allow you to be the Poop if you like.

No refunds here. Are you sure do don't want to join?
Churches are tax-exempt. You can be a bishop.
Pay no taxes.

reply to post by notsofunnyguy


Whoa hey!!
Now that i see your post i wonders...
Can i be an altar boy?
I'm old and mostly broken but ahhhh never mind it would never work

Way to go.

Make it official and log the paperwork.

Ensure you have at least 6 mates (followers) come around and
sit in your garage (church)
for a sermon (yak)
and a beer (blood of the hops).
don't forget the blessing of the Keg.

Then you should have tax-free status from the IRS.

I just thought I got a sign from God telling me I was doing the right thing.
But now I have some doubt over the sign.

I was outside and I was admiring the stars in the sky. I was just about to go inside when I saw three stars moving. I was stunned. I was sure of what I was seeing. There were three objects circling irractically in the sky. I was sure the were alien aircraft. No planes can move like that. The three specks of light were so high up there were tiny. I looked with all my attention to see what they would do next. It was amazing. I got all excited.

Then something dawned on me. During my time outside before my unidentified flying objects, I had been listening to the seagulls doing their mating thing. I then realized the objects were seagulls. They were indeed very high up in the air. And they were illuminated by the moon which was hiding over on the other side of the house.

Why has God sent me seagulls as a sign?
I would undertand the meaning if it were aliens. That's easy. There here to save us from ourselves.
But seagulls. There has to be a message in the birds.
God is testing my devotion by causing me to doubt his devine plan.
Don't worry God. I know you sent me those seagulls to test me.
I won't ever let you down.
Praise Carlin.

Did I forget to mention that the Church of Carlin is taking donations?

Huge donations. I'll accept any money you want to give to the church. You'll have to wait until the church gets an accountant if you want a reciept. I'll hold on to the money in the meantime. Don't blame the Church of Carlin. Blame the bureaucracy for the delay in recieving a reciept. Trust me. Trust in God. I'll get it to you as soon as we're accredited.

If you don't need a receipt.
All the better.

second line

Originally posted by Robin Marks
Why has God sent me seagulls as a sign?

Well you are the poop.......soooo.......got any deposits lately??

reply to post by Aloysius the Gaul


You're right. Seagulls are known for pooping on people. Especially at the beach. Usually our heads or on our sandwiches just as we're about to take a bite. God is telling us that it's all one big poop sandwich. It's all about poop.

I'm poop. You're poop. The whole world is poop.
God is telling us that in the end, we're all poop.

God is warning us. God is telling us to take safety under giant beach umbrellas.
Maybe the Elenin comet or some a giant Coronal Mass Ejection thingy is going to hit us.
We need to make a giant space umbrella to protect earth from space poop.
You're amazing. Thanks.
It's all about poop.

So sayeth the revelation from Carlin.

Hey
Good Idea.
Atleast this church wouldn't be so boring.

Here is the Ten Commandments according to our Lord.

In this complex world, it's much better to economize for time.
So God has simplified his laws and made them easier to understand.

www.youtube.com...

That would be the biggest insult to George, sorry OP, terrible idea, George was always about free thinking and truth, everybody is their own leader, and George would certainly wanna kick you in the nuts for suggesting starting a Church after him...

Peace ..v,

reply to post by Robin Marks

reply to post by wlmgsmn


When I first read your post, I thought you were mocking the church.
I thought you were one of the non-believers who said Carlin would be rolling over in his grave.
Only I know whether or not our Lord is displeased with this church, for I am the Pope.
Besides, he isn't even in a grave to be rolling around in. He was resurrected.
He became invisible and took his place in heaven.

But then I reflected on the teachings in the gospel.
George loved laughter.
So I must conclude that your expression is actually the hightest praise possible.
It's obvious you can read and you have the ability to comprend language.
You should become a member.
You have been touched by our Lord, so you should become a soldier for God.

If you joined, you'd be increasing the membership by 100%.
I still don't have anyone to call back when I shout, "Can I get an amen!"