posted on Apr, 29 2003 @ 12:25 AM
Not to shabby, I would say.
I read what you said about Cali, I think it's F*cked up you moved away.
I've known Cali to be heaven on earth. Everywhere else is so midiocre.
Your story seems like you made a lot of personal choices that determine where you are today. Its not your fault until you admit you are the
It seems as if every morning you look in the mirror and say, "your looking at the problem." When you should be saying "I'm looking at the
Don't try to look at the past with such hatred (hatred being to strong of a word). I've learned that if you want to defeat an enemy that is no where
but in your mind. Then a person must first understand that their is a gap their that must be filled.( I hope this is making sense).
You told me you have meditated, meditation does nothing but give you a better understanding of yourself and raises your awareness level anything else
is details to those two things.
You have to use the knowledge and awareness you have gained from meditation. Don't do what most people do, like meditate for 30 minutes and then
continue on with the same problem. You must use meditation to clear your mind of problems and worry and fill the gap of your mind that is causing this
problems with solutions. ( I dont know if that makes any sense to you.)
You've had a rough childhood, your not crazy in my oppinion, just lost.
"You can be surrounded by millions of people and still feel alone, you can be in a desert surrounded by nothingness and truely see who you are." -
Me and many others.
You need to find direction, I don't mean it literally, I mean spiratually. You need things of a good nature to take your mind of your problems.
Its been my experience that you can be with friends (good friends), spend time with your kids, Learn the Art of Chilling, or have Sex, ect....
Luxuries are the ultimate aphrodiziac (proably misspelled)
You live only to understand one thing, your reason for being, unfortunately nobody knows that answer, and strange enough the answer is in the question
Tell me what your interpretation of this is.
P.S. if your moving back to the states, make it Cali
[Edited on 4/29/2003 by FoxStriker]