Who I "was" is proving to be one of the greatest mysteries I feel I need to solve before I leave this life, perhaps so that I can learn/grow from
While in Europe, I met a guy who I had not known previously. (This was before I truly believed in reincarnation.) We seemed to connect on a level so
deep, that I had never felt before...certainly a strange feeling. During a dinner with him one night, he spontaneously told me that he remembered a
past life, and went on to describe in great detail a setting in a large grassy area where he was on horseback in full armor. While he was telling me
this, I suddenly remembered a quite detailed memory of a house...not sure of the timeframe since I'm not big into history...thatched-roof and timber
framework with concrete(?) (some kind of stone work) poured inside. A couple windows, a wooden door on the left side with a small, worn-down path
leading to it. All of this was in a very deep-woods, mossy area...definitely not from the Americas. I drew this for him when we returned home, and he
thought it was "our house"...but what that means as to our relationship, I don't know. I think this memory comes from medieval times or earlier. It
suddenly made sense; it wasn't as though I had made up this image. It was as if I had always remembered this house, but it had just come to me. I
then remembered being very young and always admiring/commenting to my mother about the only timber framework house in our small town each time we
passed it. I always liked it for some inexplicable reason, and now it makes more sense to me.
I also have the nagging suspicion that I was somehow involved in the Holocaust. As I've said, I'm not a history person AT ALL, but I've always had
a deep and sincere interest in it, and always felt a connection to it and the 20's/30's. I'm not sure if I was killed during that time, survived,
wasn't involved at all, or the event just really gets to me. While in the Mauthausen concentration camp in Austria, I became seriously overwhelmed
with the deepest sense of darkness, pain, and sadness...like a brick to my gut...and I could have fallen to my knees while in the gas chamber. I also
found myself thinking, "No, I can't go back in there..." Again, before I really believed in reincarnation.
While I was still young (ages 5-7 or so) I had constant recurring dreams of guns and being shot. One such dream really stuck out, where both my
parents had to face me, and an officer behind me forced me to go down on my knees while he shot me through the back. Even though I was so young, I
never felt something so real in a dream...I definitely don't know what it feels like to be shot, but I'm sure this was close! The bullet wound was
burning and dripping hot, sticky blood down my back as my vision faded to a dark red and I fell onto the gravel underneath me. I could see my
parents' faces the entire time.
The interesting thing, is that where I was shot in my dream, the curve to my scoliosis in my lower back begins...and I also have a large mole on my
stomach that could easily be an entry wound.
I have also seen visions of one of my closest friends in her past life, as what I believe to be a war secretary in WWII. I saw the complete image of
her with the same build, same basic face, but wavy bobbed hair and dark red lipstick, typing a letter on an old typewriter in front of a large _
Outside, I saw a large expanse of blacktop and most likely runways, along with hangars and several planes. The name Howard also came to me...the
strangest part is, she's a VERY quiet secretary-like person, and has a complete obsession with the Japanese...
So, I have the very beginnings of a couple lives...I just really need to see a past life regression therapist now, and get this all straightened out!