reply to post by Benevolent Heretic
What if you hadn't been able to ski for the first 25 years of your life, but
you persevered and worked hard and fought and struggled until one day, you were
able to ski! Might you be a little bit proud?
I might be. But if I was, that pride would be the result of overcoming the unhealthy condition that was preventing me from being able to ski. It would
not be pride for having been unable to ski. If a homsosexual claims to be proud for having overcome their fear of self expression, that seems
reasonable to me. But that's not quite the same as expressing pride for being gay.
I once had a conversation with a gay man in which he explained to me that he really liked sucking cock. He said it was awesome, and he had a gleeful,
happy smile on his face when he said it.
There's not much I can say to that. Here's a person who knows what he likes, acts on his preference, and takes pleasure in it. So be it. But I've
found this perspective to be very rare amongst the gay community. Far more often there's this huge pile of guilt and internal anguish. More often we
hear things like, as the OP phrased it:
What I am IS NOT a choice!!! I WAS BORN THIS WAY!!!
These are not the words of someone acting on a simple preference and having a healthy result from it. These are not the words of someone motivated by
desire to "love who they choose." These are the words of someone motivated by shame, guilt, self-pity, self-loathing, and a whole host of nasty,
Is experiencing pride preferable? Oh, absolutely. But that pride is coming from the rubber-band effect of desperately trying to escape from a huge
pile of emotional nastiness.
I assure you, they didn't feel shame because of their own judgments of homosexuality.
That came from the outside world.
Perhaps. And I would volunteer that the emotional angst amongst that "outside world" that led to their anger and accusations directed at homosexuals
probably also had its roots in unhealthy conditions.
But I don't think the cry of "it's not my fault I was born this way"
or "it's not my fault, the angst came from the outside
...I don't think either of these are likely to improve conditions for anyone.
Homosexuals can blame anyone they like, but ultimately...they're the ones who have to live with themselves. I think gays on the whole will benefit
far more from self acceptance
, than they will from getting anyone else to accept them.