Ask JaxonRoberts!

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Alright, so would this meal go better with Coke or Mountain Dew?

reply to post by Lurkerlaker


Dear So Many Questions,

It would go best with a Coke... So long as it's a Jack & Coke!

Dear JaxonRoberts,

I find myself drifting from reality into fantasy. I wish to escape this rock and journey into space. Is it possible I could build a rocket fueled by bacon grease?

reply to post by AMANNAMEDQUEST


Dear Space Case,

You could, but there is a much easier way to see the stars... It involves a rubber mallet, a sturdy tree stump and your testicles...

Dear Meat lover,

Why are you an anti-smoking nazi? and why won't your mother get off my bacon?

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Thanks for helping me prepare the best dinner ever!

Dear vengeful one,

What is the proper way to apologize for unintentionally offending someone in chat whilest trying to be funny?

-- Tactless

Dear Jaxon,I have a deep need to spank other people.
I always want to bring a belt with me when on chat.
Tell me,what is wrong with me,I need your help?

reply to post by mamabeth


It's only natural mama. The people in chat (with the exception of myself) deserve a proper spanking by a genuine mama.

reply to post by v1rtu0s0


I know that you are always good
I admit that I need help.

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


JR,

I am at a loss here...

How can I find it?

reply to post by tempesillest


Dear Necrophiliac,

I am most certainly in favor of smoking... as long as it's bacon that is being smoked...

And speaking of bacon, my mother has been pushing up daisies since the bicentenial, so the only way she could be on your bacon is if you used a shovel and...

reply to post by Lurkerlaker


Dear Twinkie the Kid,

Anytime my friend, anytime...

reply to post by rogerstigers


Dear Wannabe Comedian,

I would suggest that you start by trying to actually be funny... You will find many joke books available at your local bookstore...

reply to post by mamabeth


Dear Chat Mistress of Pain,

It's perfectly acceptable, just go buy yourself a nice leather teddy and they will BEG you to do it...

Start with v1rtu0s0... He's been a VERY bad boy!

reply to post by ugie1028


Dear Dorothy,

Follow the Yellow Brick Road... and watch out for flying monkeys!

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Dear JR,

I followed your advice...

I carried a shotgun and had infinite ammo using the contra cheat (Up down up down left right left right ab start.) and the monkeys were not an issue... but i reached the end of the road... and wound up with a holographic face in front of me controlled by a man behind a curtain... I shot him too...

this didn't solve my problem...

I have 2,000 dead monkeys and a dead man... at my feet...

How do i find my loss and get rid of this mess?



I think your advice caused more problems than it solved.

reply to post by ugie1028


Dear Jaxon,


I'm afraid Ugie needs to change his ATS avatar before the feds track him down. The question is, what should he change his avatar to?


Also, the poor little buddy had his heart torn out by a mean witch. What should he do to get over it?


Thanks

reply to post by ugie1028


Dear Gun Crazy,

This is one of those problems that is best solved with the proper use of tactical nuclear weapons... Now getting your hands on one might be a little tricky...