Ask JaxonRoberts!

reply to post by Nosred


Dear Horrible Babysitter,

The answer is ALWAYS eat the child... they are both tender and delicious...

reply to post by hhcore


Dear Freakazoid,

It's the pink tutu... that and the lack of any other clothing...

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Dear Jaxon,

Does observing a green apple increase the likelihood of all ravens being black?

Sincerely,
Nosred

reply to post by Nosred


Dear Whack-a-doo,

Did your parents have any children that lived?

reply to post by JaxonRoberts

Dear Jaxon,

It seems i have lost my pink tutu, do you know where it is?

reply to post by locster


Dear Frill Seeker,

Check Nosred's closet... He has been known to help himself to frilly and 'purty' things...

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Dear Jaxon,

Thank you for your help, i found it!
It's covered in a mucus like substance, is it weird that i hope its eel mucus?

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Dear Mathematically Challenged,

Should one tolerate intolerance; if intolerance would destroy the possibility of tolerance?

Sincerely,
Nosred

Dear Jaxon,

You seem to share the same infatuation with bacon as my younger brother who's 9 years younger... 26... are you my little brother in disguise or is this a generational thing?

reply to post by pianopraze


When Jax says "Bacon" he's not talking about food.

reply to post by locster


Dear Lost & Found,

It is not weird at all, in fact I hope it's eel mucus for your sake... Hell, I hope it's ANY kind of mucus for your sake!

reply to post by pianopraze


Dear Puzzled about Pork Products,

I am not your younger brother... It is because Bacon is quite literally the food of the Gods... EVERYTHING is better when prepared or served with Bacon... Consider Filet Mignon, the best cut of beef available... The only way to make it better??? WRAP IT IN BACON!!!

I suggest you check out the BACON thread to see some of the wonderful things that are made of bacon or bacon flavored...

And for the record, when I say bacon, I mean bacon... Pay no attention to the gnat buzzing around this thread...

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Dear Jaxon,

Why didn't you answer my last question?

Best wishes,
Nosred

reply to post by Nosred


Dear Clueless in Cyberspace,

This is hopefully the one and only time that I will dispense serious advice here, since this was posted in the jokes forum, but you seem to be begging for it, so here it is.

While you have in the past shown a pretty high level of intellectual knowledge, you have continuously shown a total lack of emotional and social maturity. Whether it is your real personality, or it is some façade you are putting on only while you are here on ATS, both would indicate someone who is sorely lacking in maturity. You seem to continuously be seeking the approval of others and try way too hard to be 'funny'. Your ejection and banning for life from chat and the circumstances leading up to this action on the part of Staff only reinforce this observation... Quite simply, you try too hard. Now you have decided to hijack this thread in another apparent cry for attention, much as your attempt to have me and many others add you to their contacts list on Skype. These constant childish antics are not endearing you to anyone, and are not making you any friends. Perhaps if you didn't try to annoy everyone, and keep nipping at their heels, you would actually be able to make some friends here, and this advice would also translate into your real life. If you behave in a similar manner there, I suspect that you lack many friends there as well.

So, in short, you need to make a sincere effort to 'grow up' and if you cannot or will not, then don't be surprised if everyone just rolls their eyes at you and ignores you, as I will from now on... So, if you are wondering why I have not, and will not answer your last question or any future question, just refer back to this post and it will become clear to you... I sincerely do hope that you take this advice to heart and become a better man, because the one you are is not well loved here by the membership who has interacted with you...

And you indeed owe every Australian member here a sincere and heartfelt apology for the things you posted in chat that got you banned for life there...

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Thank you!

It's so obvious, why couldn't I see it?!

reply to post by hhcore


Dear Pretty in Pink,

Because you are from Canuckistan....

Are twinkies wrapped in bacon any good?

reply to post by Lurkerlaker


Dear Heart Attack Waiting to Happen,

Only if you deep fry them! And make sure that you are not using any of that supposedly 'healthy' vegetable oil... Bacon Lard works the Best!!!

reply to post by JaxonRoberts


Thanks for the info! Do you happen to know where I can buy some bacon lard? Or should I make it myself?

reply to post by Lurkerlaker


Dear Cardiac Arrest,

Best to make it yourself... That way you get to eat all that yummy bacon first!