I've been in conflict with myself over whether I should share an experience I had a few weeks ago publicly, or keep it to myself. It was a difficult
decision, but ultimately I came to the conclusion that I couldn't keep something like this to myself. I feel that it might offer people a different
perspective of the world around us, maybe validate some outlooks on life, or simply entertain a few individuals who might find it inspirational.
Let's just say that a few weeks ago I found myself in a very deep meditative state. I felt myself slowly being separated from the room I was in. It
was as if I had been a two-dimensional being all my life, and suddenly I had stepped off the screen into a more three-dimensional space. Maybe it
would be better described as a fourth dimension? I don't know. The objects in the room were all the same, yet different. The way in which I became
separated was very interesting to me. The room seemed to slightly pixelate in the process, as if it had not been "real" all along, as if it had been
programed. As I was sinking deeper and deeper into the dark caverns of my consciousness, I found myself in an unexpected place. Although I could still
see the room around me, I was looking at it through what I would describe as a spherical wall of screens. To help you imagine it, think of the way a
bee or a fly might see the world through it's hundreds of eyes.
I was standing (though not physically) in a dark center of space surrounded by these "screens", and I saw the room. I got the sense that this was the
"control center" of my mind. Time had completely stopped. Time was irrelevant. A minute or an hour could have passed, and I would not be able to tell
you which was true. I was in the midst of eternity. I felt something else was with me. It wasn't physical, but I could feel it's presence close to me.
I want to say that it was separate from me, but I suddenly realized that I was it, and it it was me. I asked it to tell me why I was shown this place.
It told me that sometimes it needed to remind itself where it had come from and what it's purpose on earth was. It told me it had left small clues in
our world to help us remember where it came from and why. Suddenly I was thrown even deeper into space only to find myself (my consciousness)
floating above an incredible sight.
In the middle of dark space I witnessed something unexpected. I'm not quite sure how to even begin to describe it. I'm not sure words in the English
language exist that would be adequate to describe what I saw. In fact while I was deep in it, I thought to myself "How the hell do I describe this
when I'll want to explain to someone what I saw???" but I will try. I witnessed our universe being born and reborn over and over and over again at
very high speeds. It wasn't like the "big bang", it was more like a loop that constantly turned inside out. It was like the shape of an
inverse-rotating donut, or I suppose what some would describe as the symbol for "infinity". It was a giant, infinite fractal. This Universe was not
what we believe it to be. It performed a function, and that function was to constantly generate new possibilities. Much like computers in our world
(though extraordinarily/severely basic in comparison) the Universe was like a giant calculator/generator producing infinite possibilities through
complex mathematical equations.
There was a strong presence/consciousness hanging over it. This "calculator/computer" Universe was the creation of this consciousness, and it
overlooked every single little action with incredible yet effortless and tireless concentration. I suppose that this presence is the thing to which
many people refer to as "God". I felt a oneness with this being. I finally understood that I was it, it was me, it was you, it was the grass, it was
the rock, it was the ant, the bird, the wind, the sky, the earth,.... it was everything. It was love, hate, anger, sadness, it was us. Imagine
yourself being cut into a quadrillion pieces, and those individual pieces being able to have experiences of their own, separate from the whole.
According to my vision that's what our world is. The world and all of us, we are IT.
Since I realized what an important moment this was, I did not want to miss asking the big question. My question was "How did you come to be? Where did
this start?" It replied in a form of exchanging a thought in my mind, and the answer was that it simply WAS. It just IS. It did not know why or how,
in fact it did not care for why or how, it didn't feel the need to know why or how, it just WAS. Since we humans experience a "beginning" and an "end"
on this earth via birth and death, it is very difficult for us to imagine something having no beginning and no end. It seems inconceivable, much like
the idea of infinity, something without an end. We try to imagine it, but we struggle to come to terms with the fact that something may not have an
end or a beginning. I can't say I felt satisfied by that answer for the reason I mentioned just now, but I accepted it. My next question was why we
were here. Understanding came to me in the form of seeing. In a manner of speaking it split itself into an incomprehensible number of pieces in order
to learn. It was like an enormous calculator producing new possibilities, just churning them out constantly without end. The purpose was to learn. It
had an insatiable hunger for information.
While there, I came to understand a few things (assuming that what I have witnessed is true).
1.) It is all-knowing, all-powerful and ever-present, because it is us and we are it. It is not an old man deciding our fates, it is a consciousness
that is inside all of us. We are God and God is us.
2.) It is both partial and impartial to our suffering, because it is experiencing this world through us. To make it easier to imagine, just picture
being one of it's atoms. (Hmmm.... Adam/Atom ...
3.) We are powerful and we have the capability to influence the world/reality around us. We are creators and engineers of this world, because we
originated from the ultimate creator. Though we are stronger as a whole, we (the individuals) do posses some of this ability as a result of
originating from IT.
4.) This "physical" world we live in is a mathematical illusion. To help you understand better, it's like an extremely intricate virtual reality
program complete with physics assigned to our world, which we are forced to follow.
5.) In order to keep our experience as "real" and pure as possible, we CHOOSE to stay "blind" to our origins.
During my "outer space" experience my earth life seemed almost unreal, as if I had been playing a game for decades. I felt satisfied knowing this,
because I realized what was truly important in life. There were things that I fretted over, and now I knew they were not important. I finally knew my
purpose. My purpose was to have the experiences that I have, so that we as a whole would learn from it. You and I, we are one piece of a giant puzzle.
As strange as it may seem, I actually began to miss my "virtual" life a little, and couldn't wait to return to it so that I could continue. I was told
that it was best if I return and immerse myself back in this world, because if I didn't, it would be impossible for me to continue my mission. Since
IT was me and I was IT, I knew that I had chosen to be here. I was slowly eased out of my meditation, the room came back, the pixels began to
disappear as I "stepped" back into our three-dimensional world, time began to tick again, and the earth seemed like a real place once more. I was
happy to be back, and I was completely blown away by what I had seen during my little adventure.
Ever since I've been trying to figure out how to put the whole thing into words, and whether I should tell people about it. I guess I finally found
the courage. So, there you have it. Make of it what you will. Truth? Delusion? A little bit of both? You decide. My words are here for your
consideration, entertainment, thought, opinion, or whatever else you choose to do with them. I'm not preaching by any means. I'm only offering my
perspective of the world based on the experience I just shared.
edit on 28/3/11 by masqua because: inserted pic as requested