posted on Feb, 14 2011 @ 09:37 AM
First off, probably a good idea to get your nose out of Crowley. Not everyone is well-equipped to stare into the deranged, and come out unscathed.
Crime investigators often need to take breaks, otherwise they would go crazy with the bizarre crap they have to deal with.
I'm not saying that research into this icon's life and work is "bad", but there could easily be a psychological aspect to your dilema, and to
approach "health", you need to simultaneously take real steps away from the unhealthy in your life.
The poster who mentioned heavy metals, that's something I completely agree with. The air needs to be cleared there, if nothing else, most of us can
benefit from a bit of detox.
I'm going to share a personal story I've never shared on ATS before.
Brain tumor. It's not generally recognized, but these are not as uncommon as the medical establishment would like to believe. The
reason they probably are missed by multiple physicians is because they can "hide" very well. For MANY years in some cases.
I recall an episode from "House" where this issue was taken up. They subjected the patient to various high tech diagnostic procedures, and only
just barely found a tumor that had eluded them before. All in the nick of time of course.
In high school, there was a guy who was "normal" freshman year, and by junior year was violent, antisocial, and basically dangerous to himself and
others. Everyone thought that "something" must have happened, you know, maybe some terrible experience, sexual molestation, etc. BUT it was none
of that. In his head, just behind one of his ears was a very small tumor. It was found and removed that summer before his senior year, and almost
"miraculously", he enjoyed a very normal senior year, got a girlfriend, went to prom, etc.
I really feel this issue because I suffered from a brain tumor myself. In fact, it was not a "real" tumor, it was a meningioma (located
outside the brain, but still inside the skull). It had grown there for a very long time, and no one ever noticed. Doctors guessed that it had begun
to grow when I was 9 years old, because at that time I had suffered a violent head injury (waking up in the hospital three days later). It grew
there, ready to kill me at any moment, until at age 31, my wife woke up one morning to witness me in a grand seizure. Had it happened while
driving, someone probably could have been killed!
There were no "symptoms" per se. No headaches, etc. But who knows about "personality issues", since it had grown with me for so long? Was I a
bit antisocial because my mother lay dying in a hospital when I was in the seventh grade, or could there have been more? My father leaving the
family...that's enough for more problems in the teen years, but was there also a "medical" situation brewing?
Within a year of having my tumor removed, I was perhaps "changing". I was a mid-manager at the time, and some of my employees had noticed, and one
even said so. My wife, not so sure. Long story short, I quit my job, and became self-employed, having found "new courage" in the risk-taking
department, where there wasn't much before. Fortunately, I was in a good place at the time, and remained stable in the transition.
It was a long time ago now, but in these years in between I have never regretted my choice, and have earned far more money than I ever could have
working for someone else. Not to mention, the personal satisfaction of working for myself!
Where would I be now, if this hadn't happened? "Who" might I be, had this brain tumor episode not played it's part?