posted on Jul, 13 2004 @ 09:24 AM
Pizza gets to your house faster than an ambulance
There are handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
Drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
People order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a diet coke.
Banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counter.
We leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
We use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we
won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
We buy hot dogs in packages of 12 and buns in packages of 8.
The Canadian Civil War was a bar fight that lasted a little over an hour.
We use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures".
We have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
***How Canada got it's name***
The original name for Canada, dreamed up by a parliamentary committee in London, was "Cold North Dominion," but that was too long, so they
abbreviated it C.N.D. The King's Royal Governor presented the new name to the inhabitants, and they didn't say a word. Just looked at him.
"Well, what do you think?" asked the Royal Governor?
"C., eh?" said the first fellow, and just looked at the Governor.
"N., eh?" says the second guy.
"D., eh?" says a third one. Then silence.
"Hey," says the Governor. "I like that. It's a helluva lot easier to pronounce when you spell it that way."
So that's how Canada got its name.