My mom emailed this thought I would pass it along...




>>DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS:
> >>40-ish.............................................49
> >>Adventurous.................Slept with everyone
> >>Athletic......................................No tits
> >>Average-looking....................Ugly
> >>Beautiful........................Pathological liar
> >>Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills
> >>Emotionally Secure......................On medication
> >>Feminist..........................................Fat
> >>Free spirit....................................Junkie
> >>Friendship first..........................Former slut
> >>Fun..........................................Annoying
> >>New-Age............Body hair in the wrong places
> >>Old-fashioned.............................No BJs
> >>Open-minded.................................Desperate
> >>Outgoing......................Loud and embarrassing
> >>Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk
> >>Professional....................................Bitch
> >>Voluptuous...................................Very Fat
> >>Large frame.................................Hugely Fat
> >>Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker
> >>
> >>WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
> >>1. Yes = No
> >>2. No = Yes
> >>3. Maybe = No
> >>4. We need = I want
> >>5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
> >>6. We need to talk = You're in trouble
> >>7. Sure, go ahead = You better not
> >>8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later
> >>9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron!
> >>10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think
about?
> >>
> >>MEN'S ENGLISH:
> >>1. I am hungry = I am hungry
> >>2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
> >>3. I am tired = I am tired
> >>4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
> >>5. I love you = Let's have sex now
> >>6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
> >>7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
> >>8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
> >>9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
> >>10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
> >>11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

Originally posted by TrueLies
> >>Athletic......................................No tits

LMAO!!!Oh god, that was hilarious. Especially the last 6 ones in the Men's section lol...

It's pathetic, but so true most of the time lol...