posted on Jan, 28 2011 @ 10:25 AM
I’m posting this to maybe help some other parents out there not have to go through such a mess.
Of course hindsight is always 20/20……
My youngest son seemed to have anger problems, even when he was little.
When he started school, he seemed to do better, but he still managed to get into a little trouble, always with the same child. I asked that they not
be in the same class, but they where put together anyway. So, in 5th grade, I moved him to the other elementary. His 5th grade teacher told me he
needed to be on Ritalin. I was a bit freaked out so I made a doctors appointment with his family doctor. After being with us for 15 minutes, he
wrote the prescription. I never filled it and found a new doctor. The new doctor actually referred us to a child psychologist who then scheduled a
three hour test for him. He did not have ADD or ADHD. He did have anger issues. No drugs were recommended.
We had some rough patches during middle school and he even had to repeat the 7th grade, although this was my choice, as the school wanted me to just
pay 150.00 per class for summer school.
As a freshman, he started out ok. He loved basketball and made the team. He did have some anger issues on the court, but made it through. That
spring is when it got even worse. He skipped a lot, and was suspended. He got into some legal trouble over the summer and ended up on probation. I
asked the judge to make an evaluation and counseling part of his probation. He did, after asking the probation officer repeated for 6 months for a
referral, I just found another psychologist myself. The man had a couple of appointments with my son, then one with me. He then set up testing for
my son. My son was diagnosed with Anti-Social behavior. That scared the hell out of me. I researched it and read everything I could get my hands
on. There are no drugs for this, not that I’m a huge fan, but I was hoping something could at least help him control himself as this was actually
hurting him too. He was let off probation without being monitored AT ALL! Never had to go to anger management or counseling.
He has been in more trouble, thankfully nothing major. Again I asked for conditions in his probation. Guess what I learned? At the age of 16, at
least in my state, I CANNOT make my child do anything. How great is that? He was kicked out of regular school and attended the Alternative Ed in
our town. That is a huge joke. They even let then have Cigarette breaks, even if they aren’t 18!!!!
Well, he is 18 now and a senior at an Alternative Ed in another town. They have a basketball program and he made the team and has not missed a day of
school yet. The principle there is a lot more demanding, but seems to really care that the kids do what they need to and really lets parents know
what is going on, even if the kid is 18. I am cautiously optimistic that he is learning a bit of control.
There are so many other details I haven’t listed about things that went on with his behavior, but this would be pages long.
I did actually write a letter about this to the opinion section of a newspaper, but after calling and verifying I wrote it, and telling me in would be
in the next week’s paper, unsurprisingly, it never was printed.
My point to telling this story, is so that parents don’t just figure because the teacher recommended it, it must be ok. I actually found out that
in our state, what she did was illegal. Don’t always trust your doctor either. If you think there may be a problem, make sure your child is fully
evaluated and just continue to fight to get them the help they need while they are young enough that you can.