Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

I am so glad we have a place here to vent out feelings of this nature.

For the last 3 and half years I have not had any companionship with a girl, but I always meet women who want to have fun. Even my friends older than me just want to have fun. I feel that I suffer so much because I know what love is. If I didn't know than I would be like other emotionally stable people who don't really want to get married that much. Like the example of me walking by my ex everyday at work, she's one of the most sexually attractive girls I have ever known, again she just wanted to have "fun." I am not a competitive guy who wants to chase down girls. If I didn't go through my whole life competing with other guys for a mate than it is all likely I would never meet anybody. Women need something extra, these days they don't just come out and like you. It is all about you choosing where to go on the first date, about you wanting to be romantic with them. They make it clear that they do not "chase" men, but men must chase them (generally speaking).

If you say to let it come to you and have it be natural, I would said its not because of my looks or personality, but that girls don't love guys anymore, they just love social status, or what they would socially want. I moved to a new state 3 and a half years ago and left my girlfriend, if I was the college football star over here I would have had companionship by now for sure. Definetly I have learned through these years the person for me is far away from the social scene.

I always say you would and other guys would be better of like me, just do not bother with females, i do not and have never, its not my bag.

Your not really missing anything i would suggest either. But if your really into it, you will have to do what you have to do.

Personally males are better off like me, and i am glad i never bothered with them.

reply to post by HRegressor


Um nope, not all woman. I'm not about social scenes on first dates. In fact, I would rather order pizza and play some Halo for a first date. Plus it's almost free with the exception of the pizza Also, I am ALL about connection. I've dated many hot guys but could not "feel" a connection and stop pursuing them. They couldn't understand lol Call me old fashioned I guess. What do you mean by fun though? I love to have fun, video games, water parks, four wheelin, watching the stars and starting a campfire and road trips. There is nothing wrong with having fun, life is short. You need to live it! Sorry about it being all me, I only know how I am about these situation. You will find her. Finding the "right" one is like finding 1 fish out of thousands. It takes time and patients going through all of them.

Well dude, I suggest you sign up for some of the relationship websites. Sounds like your looking for depth and meaning over the trivials of social gatherings.

So, you need to stop seeking out people in social gatherings obviously.

Now, all females want to feel wanted of course, and so a bit of a chase is required overall, but the games played in social society is meant for both partys that simply want to have fun. There are many match websites out there that can help you out. Just answer the questions honestly for yourself and if something comes from it, great...otherwise, just focus on yourself.

Well, I'm going to assume your a bit younger than I am, but don't give up. There really are plenty of girls/women out there like myself that could give a rat's butt about social climbing and all that. The real problem is how to meet us since we are off doing our own thing, not needing a man. I do love men, my husband infinately. I grew up a tomboy and still choose to live that way. Try stores, classes ect. that entail the types of things your truly interested in. You may be surprised.

Originally posted by HRegressor
I am so glad we have a place here to vent out feelings of this nature.

For the last 3 and half years I have not had any companionship with a girl, but I always meet women who want to have fun. Even my friends older than me just want to have fun. I feel that I suffer so much because I know what love is. If I didn't know than I would be like other emotionally stable people who don't really want to get married that much. Like the example of me walking by my ex everyday at work, she's one of the most sexually attractive girls I have ever known, again she just wanted to have "fun." I am not a competitive guy who wants to chase down girls. If I didn't go through my whole life competing with other guys for a mate than it is all likely I would never meet anybody. Women need something extra, these days they don't just come out and like you. It is all about you choosing where to go on the first date, about you wanting to be romantic with them. They make it clear that they do not "chase" men, but men must chase them (generally speaking).

Not true...

I chased my man and that is one thing he said he loved about me. I was persistent and forward. I am not going to wait for some guy to ask me out, if I am interested I will make my move.

First dates don't matter to me as long as we have a good time. I had a first date at a bookstore once for coffee and it was great...Only shallows women really care about that stuff.

If you say to let it come to you and have it be natural, I would said its not because of my looks or personality, but that girls don't love guys anymore, they just love social status, or what they would socially want. I moved to a new state 3 and a half years ago and left my girlfriend, if I was the college football star over here I would have had companionship by now for sure. Definetly I have learned through these years the person for me is far away from the social scene.

I met my man who just recently shattered my heart because of the kinds of women you seem to seek as well, and we met by fate as we both called it. It was natural and amazing. I love him more than anyone I have ever loved in my life even after him hurting me. I don't hate him and I am right here when he snaps the hell out of it. I get having bad experiences but not everyone is the same. Maybe you look for the wrong type..My experience is when a guy actually gets the good girl they always complain they could never find, they get scared and run and the same can be said for women when they find that guy they always wanted. It happens to me and I have seen it happen many times. I just can't be that girl guys complain about. It's not me but it seems like so many like that and want it...

Don't give up. Someone is out there just for you

I found my soul mate and right now we are having a bump in the road. Things will work out as they slowly seem to be.

Maybe look for women in places you feel most comfortable and yourself in.

Thanks a lot for all of your positive feedback, it is all directly on point. I instantly felt more healed after posting, it means a lot for people to hear from you and understand. Since then I have been realizing, its not just girls, we all want to have fun even me. No way ever you can blame a gender for this stuff, we experience these same type things equally in the same way, all of us at one point or another for different reasons. I just wish everybody meets the perfect one, because why would you not want to best drug in the world? The best drug and its natural, how can you beat that lol.

I would said its not because of my looks or personality, but that girls don't love guys anymore, they just love social status, or what they would socially want.

Sounds like you may be looking at the wrong candidates, my friend.

eh they grow out of it once they finally realize their looks aren't always going to stay. I'm well HE'S lucky that I rather have a guy who loves me for me than for how I look.

Originally posted by noobgal
eh they grow out of it once they finally realize their looks aren't always going to stay. I'm well HE'S lucky that I rather have a guy who loves me for me than for how I look.

edit on 18-1-2011 by noobgal because: (no reason given)

Originally posted by noobgal
eh they grow out of it once they finally realize their looks aren't always going to stay. I'm well HE'S lucky that I rather have a guy who loves me for me than for how I look.

edit on 18-1-2011 by noobgal because: (no reason given)

By then though they are "used up"(in a mostly mental/emotional aspect, sometimes it isn't until their looks already are going that they "grow up" and it is more of a matter of desperation on their part) and not worth the effort...

Either way just try and be true to your own-self. Keep your standards, never lower them and always seek self improvement. I remember once on another forum got into an argument about gold-digging type mentality a lot of women(and some men) have. This one chick said "I am not like that" and used how she met her husband as proof[the story goes like this, he asks her out she said no, year later when he had his own place,car etc he asked her out and she said yes, that was awesome amusing to be like "umm you are a gold digger"].

But I find it amusing how everyone is different online and "not like that". When in reality most people are "like that".
Even the OP, whining like women are objects to be used. He is only whining because he isn't getting any.
That type of mindset just comes across to me as the "unsuccessful jerk" type mindset.

Some people might find this hard to believe but the male and female consciousness are very similar(varying more individually than gender after adjusted for social conditioning). Sure hormones and genetics play a role, but that role only exists really on an instinctive layer. The layer before thought emerges. The world, life, is often a cruel and tragic thing. The only thing we can really do is just be realistic about it. Or at the least have a healthy dose of cynicism.

Originally posted by innervision0730
Um nope, not all woman. I'm not about social scenes on first dates. In fact, I would rather order pizza and play some Halo for a first date. Plus it's almost free with the exception of the pizza

Also, I am ALL about connection. I've dated many hot guys but could not "feel" a connection and stop pursuing them. They couldn't understand lol Call me old fashioned I guess. What do you mean by fun though? I love to have fun, video games, water parks, four wheelin, watching the stars and starting a campfire and road trips. There is nothing wrong with having fun, life is short. You need to live it! Sorry about it being all me, I only know how I am about these situation. You will find her. Finding the "right" one is like finding 1 fish out of thousands. It takes time and patients going through all of them.

To me it is all about location, the reason why you're so cool is because your from Indiana. Those I have met from Indiana are very down to earth and really cool people. I agree that when you find the connection everything turns into the real 'fun' where your in a relationship that is full of smiles and laughter, so you can go any place, do anything and it is fun. I moved to Arizona for my business, and to me the only things that are liked in the social crowd are tattoos, watching ufc, and going to the desert to shoot guns. Being from northern California I have a nice guy attitude. Girls hate nice guys in az, they like the bad boys. So my soul was torn apart for years. Now when I go back to northern california is the only time I can feel ok because people are so nice up there they talk to you in the grocery store or the gas station, it reminds me why I actually have a nice guy personality and how much I hate arizona for not accepting me.