The real John Boehner!!

I have done a search on the internet to no avail. I have not been able to find Mr. John Boehner's birth certificate. Maybe I am not looking hard enough or maybe he is not showing us because he is not who he claims to be. We all know the speculation that Obama is actually a Kenyan but we have a possibly new birther movement coming around and this time it's about Mr. Boehner.

If he thinks he can lead the House of Representatives without showing us documentation that makes me mad. It also makes me speculate upon who he might actually be. Now please follow along as I will try and keep this a simple as possible.

We all know Boehner has an unusual color to his skin, no I am not racist to John Boehner, but it lead me to serious searching for a possible people with a tan that looks like his orange glow, yet no success. So I then decided to look for a race of people that have this orange glow and you will be shocked to discover that Mr. Boehner is not who he claims to be or tries to make you believe he is.

No, he is not British or German or French. Mr. Boehner is not even of European descent!

Look at these pictures below and you tell me if you see the resemblance!

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/a545c12dfe2b.png[/atsimg]

That was a picture of Mr. John Boehner and his orange glow.

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/f913de2092d0.png[/atsimg]

AAAHHHAAAA!!!!!

He is a child of the Oompa-Loompas from Loompaland. These Oompa-Loompa's are descendants from the African Pygmies! Mr. John must have escaped Willie Wonka's Chocolate Factory possibly because he was freakishly tall for his kind which are naturally knee-high. Could he be the son of the supposedly fictional character Willy Wonka who mated with an Oompa-Loompa to create John Boehner!?

YOU DECIDE!

Pictures provided from these two links

Oompa-Loompa

John Boehner

I'ts about time you added a dislaimer to your threads Misoir

No, I am not Racist ...

We all know the truth here.

reply to post by Misoir


Actually people with an orange (orange/olive complection) glow to their skin can be found among the Semitic tribes - namely those with B Blood group.

I have the exact same complection as does many of my family members.

I hope he would reply with "in my pants", that way I could applaud him for accepting his name is actually pronounced as bone-er like the term used for an erect penis, and for stopping to try and convince me his family heritage is not a complete joke.

Miso.. Not cool at all.
The Oompa's were there because someone tried genocide on their people or similar.. They were refugees and Gene Wilder gave them honest work... How can you be so heartless as to give them the Boehner?

That picture though, same one on his GOP Bio one... It's like a drag queen gone horribly astray.

I hate to break up the comedy hour but I don't believe the speaker of the house needs to be a natural born citizen, Presidents however do need to be, at least according to the constitution, since it is a requirement I see no reason not to make sure. And don't be racist against orange people, Snookie never did anything to you.

reply to post by The_Phantom


Snookie took "Smoosh Smoosh" away from me.. It used to mean something profound, and beautiful. Now... Now I can't even look at my abdominal tattoo that says it without thinking about the Juliuses...

I look at Boehners picture and think.. "America has been conned by an Orange man.. An Orange Julius lurking on capital hill.. Biding his time to use the American tax-payer in a similar manner as he mis-uses his mascara eye-liner as shown in that picture above his rosey cheeks.. He will use them,, In a wholy inappropriate manner."

Don't be so paranoid, it's not like a little O.J. ever killed anybody. Never mind, run for the hills!

Stop mocking my thread! This is serious business here. I think I am onto something!

Originally posted by Misoir
Stop mocking my thread! This is serious business here. I think I am onto something!

I think so misoir, .... this could be a conspiracy which reaches into the highest echelons of our Government, military, media, .... and the very fabric of society itself.

There is an old Mayan prophecy which warns against " the rise of the orange ones".

Holy cripe !
You guy's are killing me !
Good stuff.

reply to post by The_Phantom


But where's his paperwork, showing that he was a US citizen for 7 years before he was elected? This has me worried! Our country is being usurped! This orange man came from no where!

And what kind of a name is Boehner, anyway??? Isn't that foreign? And I hear he's a Catholic! Idol worshiper! There's just so much wrong about this guy! :shk:

Two words: Lisbeth Lyons

And as much as this guy cries and worries over his appearance? Not to mention his obsession with Barney Franks... C'mon!

Well even if he was bright(er) orange he still looks more human than the plastic skin zombie that was the Speaker before him!

reply to post by Benevolent Heretic


He has never had citizenship in another country, so unless he was born on the moon and brought here as an "illegal alien" five years before getting involved in politics by the oompa loompa race then his story seems to add up. He graduated high school from Cincinnati in 1968 and became a representative in 1984. So that is seven years, I hope he was paying his taxes that whole time, it seems that is a problem with some representatives. But if you want to go check the records I encourage it, wouldn't want anybody sneaking through the system when they shouldn't be. Tell you what, if he pays a million dollars to hide his records then he might be hiding something and the first thing you should do is find Willy Wonka to see if you can get some answers.

EUREKA!
Proof that Boehner Bin Ladin is NOT a U.S. Citizen:

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/ae57de65a575.jpg[/atsimg]

reply to post by lordtyp0


Born 2004? See now you went and made this whole thread very silly.

Originally posted by The_Phantom
He has never had citizenship in another country,

How do you know this? Can you prove it?

And it doesn't matter anyway. Congressmen can be foreign-born.

reply to post by The_Phantom


Just.. LOOK at his birthdate! How can you trust someone that young, but matured that fast?? The creature must have molted to have aged like that.

How can you be sure of his intentions either? I bet his jaw dislocates before he eats blond babies or something... David Icke may have been right O_o

reply to post by lordtyp0


"Sex: Boehner"

Freudian Slip? LMAO!

It's obvious that he is an Ompah Lompah! And apparently a sexual deviant by birth!

reply to post by lordtyp0


I edited before I saw your new post. All dignity and realism has now been lost on this topic, he is at least 8 or 9 years old, give me that.