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My NDE changed me forever

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posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 10:27 AM
My NDE took place in November 2007. It IS what got me interested in everything paranormal. After this experience, I became completely obsessed with learning as much as I could about ancient religions, aliens, human kinds history, as well as things like the brain and soul. I have to start by saying that all my life, I was raised Christian and was taught that UFO's or aliens were demonic, that psychic gifts were of the devil, and especially that no other religion, but Christianity was the "right" religion.

I was 34 years old when I had my 13th surgery. I have had more health problems than you can possibly imagine. They started when I was 25. I had an unusual tumor on the backside of my uterus. So unusual in fact, that they video taped the surgery and now use it as a teaching tool at OSU. From that surgery, I grew adhesions. Basically scar tissue inside instead on the outside. My body did not know when to stop the healing process and this scar tissue began to cover my vital organs. I have absolutely no female organs left. I've had my appendix and gall bladder removed. I have had all but about 6 inches of my large intestine removed, several feet of small bowel and 6 of my lymph nodes all cut out due to adhesions. Not to mention the heart attacks I've had due to all the strain this has put on my heart.

My 13th surgery was in October 2007. I had to have a double bowel resection. I had my 2nd heart attack on the table and wound up recovering in the CCU. (cardiac care unit). I spent 14 days there, none of which I remember, and then was sent home to recuperate. I do remember waking up in my bed at home less than 48 hours later. It was completely soaked with this nasty brown fluid that drained out of my incision. I had 26 staples holding my stomach together and that is where the fluid was coming from. I vaguely remember going to the ER.

I now know that I was taken in for emergency surgery and that they called in the family because they did not think I was going to make it. My lungs had filled up with the same fluid that was seeping from my stomach. My liver ruptured and I had congestive heart failure and respiratory failure. Technically, I died for 7 minutes. The infection was in my blood stream and had gone to the brain as well. To this day, they were never able to "type" the infection. They even flew in a man from the CDC in Atlanta. It wasn't any of the obvious, staph, MRSA, etc. I spent a month and a half in ICU in a coma.

This is where my NDE starts. I was floating over my body, looking at myself and the doctors around me. I then floated out somewhere in the hospital where I seen my half sister, her children, and her mother coming in the main entrance to the hospital. I had not seen my sister for 6 years before this, and had not seen her mother since I was 14. But I seen them coming into the hospital. And, yes they were really there. Found this out after all was said and done.

I then floated back to where my body was. Only things had somehow changed. The doctors who were there, gone. There were now 3 "beings" standing on one side of my bed. They were all tall and the same height. I could not make out there faces because they were masked in light. Their faces were like light refracted off a lens or something. Looked smeary. I was then sitting on the edge of my bed or something and 3 other "beings" walked into my room. They were all short and had the faces of light also. I had an overwhelming sensation of happiness and joy that I can't quite explain.

The shorter beings told me, telepathically, that I had died. All of our communication was done in "thought". They had told me that I had died, but that I had to go back. I asked how I was going to go back and they told me that I was going to have to be"born again". Again, I asked them how. They led me out of the room that I was in and to another room where there was large circular "room" with a black weird looking chair in the middle of it. It was see through so that you could see in and out of it. They told me to go in and sit in the chair, that the room was going to fill up with this fluid. I asked how I was going to be able to breath and they told me that it was like being back in my mother's womb and that instinct would take over. I was unusually calm and happy.

I went into the room and sat in the chair. I could see them, and they could see me. The room began to fill with this warm, pink, clear liquid. I literally remember feeling it. Then all of the sudden, I am some place else. I was in "The Light". It was just light, everywhere. No floors, ceilings or walls. I did not know that I had died, that I had children, or that I was ever sick. It was the ultimate feeling of joy and peace. Then this man appears. I recognize him as the same man from a really vivid dream I had as an 8 year kid. I knew that I knew him. It was the only thing I knew other than I was happy.

He tells me that I have died and that I need to go back. Again, we are communicating in our minds. He tells me that it my choice though. That I have to choose to go back. I then begin to have all these memories flash in front of my eyes. I then realized that I have 2 children that need me. Then instantly, as quick as I could think it, I am laying in a hospital bed. But I am still in the light, and can see "the tunnel" behind me. The man begins to move away from me and he is taking the light with him. I am now remembering that I was sick and was rushed back to the hospital.

As the man is moving away from me, taking the light, I began to feel scared and yelled,(in my head) for him not to leave me. He tells me that my mother has to take me back and that she has to take me through the door on the right. And instantly she appears by my bed. She had her head buried in her arms, crying on the railing of the hospital bed. The light has moved farther away and I am now half way into the tunnel. I can see a distinct separation from the tunnel and the light. I yell to him again, not to leave me. That my mom thinks I am dead and he needs to tell her I'm not.

Again in an instant, the light moves further away and I am deeper into the tunnel. I can clearly see a "door" on my right side and my mother looks up at me with a surprised and happy look. The tears still streaming down her face. I look up at her and say, "Mommy, I'm alive."

This is where it changes again in an instant. When I looked up at my mom, she was now standing in front of the window in my room in the ICU at the hospital. I was alive and awake. I then repeated again that I was alive and she said, "I know you are honey,". I asked her where the man went? And she asks me, "What man?" I tell her emphatically like I knew that she knew who I was talking about.

"The man standing at the foot of my bed, dressed in white. Was that a doctor or something?" And she looks down at the foot of my bed and back at me, with the biggest smile on her face. She says, "Honey, there hasn't been anyone but me in here for the last 4 hours."

I was disoriented a bit, but this is my first moment being "alive". Only a month and a half had gone by. I had been in a coma and was just waking up from it. I turned 35 while in this coma. I had been on life support and had tubes and drains everywhere. I spent over 3 months in the hospital recovering. I had 8 different teams of doctors. I literally had to learn how to do everything all over again as my muscles had atrophied.

I have to point out that my mother told me that right before I told her that I was alive, that I said, "Thank you Jesus. Thank You." And she truly believes that the man I asked about was Jesus. He was also the man from a very real dream I had when I was 8 years old, that I have never forgotten. What are the chances of that happening? I don't know. I do know that he was one and the same.

I had several doctors and nurses tell me that they knew God was real because of me. That there was absolutely nothing they did or could have done to save me. They called me "Miracle" because they said that's what I was and that the only reason they could come up with was that "God", or some higher power wanted me here. That they couldn't explain my recovery, because they had absolutely no idea what happened to me. They told me they threw every experimental drug out there at the time (Dr. from CDC) into me cause they had no idea what to treat. Some of these drugs had to be "green" sheeted, or signed off on. And I can never have them again.

This event is what lead me here to ATS. This experience totally changed me. This is my first time publicly sharing it. My Christian mind can comprehend some of it, but the first part is what totally freaked me out. Don't know any other way to put it. I still haven't settled things in my mind about it. I also know that these were not hallucinations. They were very real and had a deep impact in my life. They changed me.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 10:39 AM
reply to post by cloudwatcher

i had an OBE once but nothing like that. sounds cool try and remember it well and go back to that place when you get scared or lonely.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 10:45 AM
Thank you for sharing. This is different than other NDEs but every NDE is different.

We believe your story.

You said that your life/outlook has changed?

How do you view life or live your life differently now because of your experience of "what the other side is like"?

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 10:46 AM
Thank you for sharing your Amazing Experience ! Wow ! I've had obe's most of my life but never anything as intense and , to me, reassuring , as yours. I wish you much Good Health , Love & Joy .

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 12:11 PM
reply to post by cloudwatcher

I believe your experience.

Thank you for sharing it.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 12:12 PM
reply to post by cloudwatcher

Thank you for going to such lengths to share what is clearly difficult to put into words. It would be fascinating if you could collaborate with a talented artist to put together a series of images.

You might find some of the previous discussions of interest, such as Near-death experiences are real, and we have the proof say scientists. (Some interesting medical evidence is presented in the last two posts on p.6 & covered on p.9, etc.)

And here's someone else who had his mind blown: he went beyond working with an artist and made an entire video.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 12:22 PM
reply to post by theprofessionalnyc

It is hard for me to put into words the changes that I have gone through. And a few paragraphs on here is hardly enough to describe these changes in me. I do feel more aware, awake, and better informed somehow. My memory is sharper than it had been and besides knowing that I would be leaving my children behind, I am not afraid to die. I see humanity as a whole. A wonderful creation, one of many with so much potential for good and evil. It is just too difficult to put into a few words on here.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 12:36 PM
reply to post by cloudwatcher

You'll never be able to adequately put it into words. All the sights, sounds, touches, smells, are yours and yours alone.

It's a wonderful story. You've touched me and I'm sure many other readers, but there has to be a bigger reason for your recovery than that. I suspect you will one day figure out why you are still here with us.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 12:58 PM
reply to post by pause4thought

Thank you for the links. I appreciate all the well thought out views and stances on these ever so delicate issues. I would say that for the most part, my experience confirmed things that I had already believed. But led to a quest to answer why I believed that way because not all things were lining up with how I had preconceived things. If that makes sense?

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 01:13 PM
Very interesting, credible and moving account. Thank you for sharing.

Kind of freaky though to consider the degree to which there is more going on than meets the eye.. that there may be watchers and helpers, etc. etc. who lives in worlds, and who access...technologies, that we cannot even imagine.

Reassuring also, to consider that it's not just a WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get) Materialist Monist (matter is primary) Godless and impersonal world and universe.

It makes me sad for the atheist, who think they are so right, but are so wrong, and who seem angry even hateful and hard hearted towards those with faith and/or who have had these types of experiences, and who betray their ignorance to try to chalk these things up to the spasms of a dying brain, which just doesn't pass muster as a valid explanation.

Too bad we can't all access that pink fluid rebirthing process without having to go through the health issues you have.

May you be well and happy, and may the love and power and glory of God (whatever that may be, or mean) continue to be made known through you and your testimony.

posted on Dec, 1 2010 @ 09:23 PM
Thanks for sharing with us, Cloudwatcher; there are several of us here that have had NDE's, and they almost always have a very profound effect on you afterwards; also, the NDE experience is always different but usually basically the same for most people; Dr Raymond Moody did extensive research on the phenomana and wrote several books detailing numerous case studies.

Here is a link to my NDE thread

perhaps you will find it of interest, for mine was a tad bit different than yours...

blessings to All.


posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 08:30 AM
reply to post by the seeker_713g

Thank You so much for sharing that with me. Your experience reminds me of the "dream" I had when I was 8. When I began to read your experience, I was taken aback by the similarities. I haven't looked into the book yet, but rest assured, I will. My hesitance to share this experience was because of the fact it was so different than others that I had read. Part of it, my Christian faith embraced without reservation, but the other part of mine, I had never heard of anyone else having this kind of experience. Funny thing is, I do not feel confused about it. I just haven't decided that the explanation I came up with, is one that I am ready to accept. On a personal note, were you given anything in this place? Something you may have brought back with you?

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 08:46 AM
reply to post by NewAgeMan

So, Newage, do you know something about this pink liquid and rebirthing place? This is the part that I can't quite settle my mind on.

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 09:01 AM
reply to post by cloudwatcher

Hi, I was just wondering if you had ever been baptized? I wonder if the man you saw sent you back so you can be 'immersed' first?

edit on 2-12-2010 by iamnot because: (no reason given)

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 09:53 AM
reply to post by iamnot

Yes, iamnot. I have been baptized. I was raised Christian. Saying this, my preconceived notion of death was of the Christian persuasion. Something I think the latter reflects. The first part is what I am questioning.

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 10:26 AM
reply to post by cloudwatcher

I don't understand clearly, you mean the first part as in the Christian view is what you're questioning? Thanks for clearing that up about the baptism by the way. It took a load off my mind when you confirmed that. To me it shows how it matters not that a person ritualistically enters into a literal baptism of water but that a person have a complete change of mind about Jesus. This is true 'immersion', one must personally believe. You are a miracle of Jesus, thanks for sharing your story with us.

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 05:29 PM
Very inspirational story.
Thank you for sharing it with us, and welcome to ATS

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 05:59 PM
Firstly, I am sorry to hear you have had such a difficult time medically. I sincerely hope everything is on the upswing for you now, and that you are as healthy as you can be, considering your medical history.

Your OP comments that the experience changed your life, and I would be interested in knowing some of the ways it was changed, if you would indulge commenting on this aspect.

I will join in with the others by expressing my appreciation in your willingness to share this amazing story.

posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 06:59 PM
reply to post by cloudwatcher
Cloudwatcher, all I will say that I brought back with me is the memories of my experience, and the peace of mind that comes with knowing that this is but a brief stop on the long journey home; I do honestly feel that our CREATOR is not interested in the convolutions of religion, but in the depth and quality of our spirituality.

In other words, I realise that I am a spiritual being having a human experience, not a human having a spiritual experience.

blessings to all


posted on Dec, 2 2010 @ 07:24 PM

I would like to say that your are lucky that you have had such a wonderful experience but no one should have to go though what you've been though. I would like to ask have you come out of your NDE with any strange abilities? Things like seeing strangers face while trying to sleep and/or hearing a females voice just before you nod off?

I ask because I have been having these experiences since I had my accident around two years ago(Which didn't envole an NDE I shoud add). It is said that people who suffer trauma or NDEs come away with phychic abilities.

Here is an artical that talks about NDEs activating the third eye, that I think you might like:

And a link to my thread about my experiences:

Thanks for sharing.

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